madball2289 Posted February 16, 2012 Posted February 16, 2012 Ok, so I was dating this girl for a while and everything was great. At one point she said she was depressed and all that so I figured ok I will just stick with her and help her. New Year's day we broke up because she said she wanted to be single and didn't want to be in a relationship.( SO I am the dumpee in this case) Mind you, for christmas i bought her very expensive jewlery. So I feel like I might have been played in a way. She said she wanted to be single, but made it out like she wouldn't be talking to other people. Regardless, whether she is or isn't, I've been trying my best to meet other people. I contacted her once after the break up, just to say hi, and she said she was sorry for everything and that this was best for her. She said she missed me, but she feels like this is the best thing for her. It's been just about a month and a half since I've seen her. I have bumped into a friend of hers since then and didn't even mention anything. I figured it was best not to say anything. As hard as I've been trying to meet other people, I still think about her. I want to contact her but I feel like I did everything I could and I even contacted her once to say I was ok but am really not. So I was wondering what you all think? If any move or contact is made at this point, I think it has to be on her end. She could be talking to another guy for all I kno. I in the back of my head I really do want her back, but I'm really trying to just meet other people and move on. It's been hard.
EgoJoe Posted February 16, 2012 Posted February 16, 2012 Welcome to LS. Why not tell us a bit more and get some of the other stuff off of your chest?
Frank13 Posted February 16, 2012 Posted February 16, 2012 There is no point in contacting her. She wanted out to be single. There is nothing you can do to fix that. I agree with you that any move for contact has to be on her end. It doesn't matter if you want her back. She is the one that wanted out so she is the one who would have to contact you to get back together.
EgoJoe Posted February 16, 2012 Posted February 16, 2012 There is no point in contacting her. She wanted out to be single. There is nothing you can do to fix that. I agree with you that any move for contact has to be on her end. It doesn't matter if you want her back. She is the one that wanted out so she is the one who would have to contact you to get back together. I of course agree with Frank, but, it would be cathartic for him to go more in depth I think.
NopeNah Posted February 16, 2012 Posted February 16, 2012 I of course agree with Frank, but, it would be cathartic for him to go more in depth I think. why? He should just take his lumps and bounce..what more do you need to hear? 1
Philosoraptor Posted February 16, 2012 Posted February 16, 2012 I can't disagree, there is no reason to contact her. If she wanted something she could make contact, but she wanted out because she was unhappy with things at that point. The "I wont see other people" line is usually bullcrap and just a way to try and lessen their guilt. 1
chelsea2011 Posted February 16, 2012 Posted February 16, 2012 Yeah, just keep doing what your doing and don't worry about her. Live your life and if she comes back she does, if not, you will already be ahead of where you were. Don't waste your time on someone who is on and off liike that..it's simply not worth the energy.
Author madball2289 Posted February 16, 2012 Author Posted February 16, 2012 thanks for the input everyone. I feel like I'm not 100% over it yet, but I'm pretty much just about at the final stretch of shaking this off and being over it. I just hate how this girl made it out in the beginning like she wanted to be with me and now she's gone. Of course I check on her facebook (shame on me) and she seems to be doing fine. I'm just trying to do my own thing and let it go. Just sucks being with someone all the time, then all of sudden they're gone. But like i said I'm just about seeing the light at end of the tunnel as far as getting over it goes.
CaliBabe Posted February 16, 2012 Posted February 16, 2012 She walked away do not be the one to contact, let her do the contacting at this point. 1
EgoJoe Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 I was trying to encourage the OP to vent a bit more. Not contact.
Author madball2289 Posted February 17, 2012 Author Posted February 17, 2012 there's not really much more to vent about. She obviously doesn't want to be with me so there's nothing else I can do. Haven't heard from here since I initiated contact to say I was ok with the break up, even tho, deep down I really wasn't. I really did have strong feelings and she doesn't feel as strongly for me. That's all I can say. I feel very heartbroken and I am just trying to take all that negative energy and depression and put it into meeting other girls and finding someone who wants to be with me.
Chi townD Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 Geez, every post you've put out there you've mentioned about "putting yourself out there" or "meeting girls" The fact is, you're not over your Ex, if you were you wouldn't be on here. And it's okay to be single yourself for a while so you can FULLY heal from this relationship. Becuase, if you aren't FULLY heal then you're not being fair to yourself and you're CERTAINLY not being fair to the girl you would date. Relax! heal...work on yourself.... 1
Author madball2289 Posted February 17, 2012 Author Posted February 17, 2012 I understand what you're saying, but I'm just trying to keep living, that's all
Chi townD Posted February 17, 2012 Posted February 17, 2012 I understand what you're saying, but I'm just trying to keep living, that's all And that's okay dude! But, you can do self improvements to yourself without having to put yourself out there. Going to the gym, getting a new haircut; a new wardrobe. Going back to school. Working on that promotion at work. Taking a vacation to a place that you've always wanted to go. Dog sledding in Alaska, Diving in the Florida Keys, white water in West Virginia, cattle run in Montana (if your in the states). Girls aren't going anywhere, in fact there's more of them than there are us! It will come in time. 1
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