Kate Posted June 3, 2004 Posted June 3, 2004 Is he? If he is trying to get financially comfortable, still lives with mom, trying to run his own business, doesn't have a real relationship with his dad, doesn't really like his sister, very quiet by nature? What's the deal with guys this age? Do they WANT to be ready but aren't?? I'm confused -- I also wrote the link about my best frined who broke up w/ me yesterday....this is the guy....help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ready2moveon26 Posted June 3, 2004 Posted June 3, 2004 If he doesn't want to commit...there is NOTHING you can do about it. He has to grow up first and if you can wait for that, you can make it. My husband (soon to be ex) is 27 and is so incredibly inmature it isn't funny. Age is JUST a number.
wideawake Posted June 4, 2004 Posted June 4, 2004 Originally posted by moimeme Age and maturity have little to do with each other. no doubt on that one. I know a bunch of 35-45 year old guys that I would lable as children. And than you have guys like our Mr. Zepplin....
vhshowdown Posted June 4, 2004 Posted June 4, 2004 Ya but you cant stereotype us though. Not all us 20s guys are immature. But chances are if he still lives at home with mama, then ya he is not ready for a mature relationship, cause he has mom to contend with. And more than likely, she is a MAJOR influence on him, so she is number 1 right now! And he hasnt really gotten out there to experience life. Once he breaks out on his own, sees how hard it is to take care of yourself, etc..... then maybe he will be ready. Just be weary that he looks for someone to take care of them........
jk Posted June 4, 2004 Posted June 4, 2004 I'm in the same boat, Kate. My boyfriend said he couldn't commit anymore after 3 years. He's turning 25 this year and he keeps going back and forth on what he wants to do in life. It was just very frustrating....AND, on top of that he was flirting around with his co worker who is much much younger than he is. I don't know if this is typical of guys in their mid-20's- like a mid-20's crisis? Do they just wake up one day and start freaking out and feel like they need to seek approval from 18 year old girls?
Samson Posted June 4, 2004 Posted June 4, 2004 There is a clash between mother nature and our societal expectations. The phase shift has left 20 somethings behind. Evolution has made them what they are--reproductive tools. Society is forcing them to successfully mate for LIFE, which is longer every year. A Life Sentance used to mean about 20 years. Historically speaking this wasn't very long ago that we could expect to mate and die within 20 years. Yes, those were the days, my friends: Fewer divorces! But regardless of the lengthening longevity, men continue to be pressured to marry in their 20's. Let's just end the insanity here and now: Raise the legal age that we can get married to 40! Write your state legislature today!
mendingmyheart04 Posted June 4, 2004 Posted June 4, 2004 I'm a transplant in the deep south and it blows my mind the way everyone here is still expected to marry in their early twenties and start having kids. And, THEN the grandparents end up raising the kids...I've never seen anything like it. I work with two women in their 50's who are basically the main care-givers to their grandchildren while the adult children are going out and having fun...yet they act like this is normal. I'm in my early 30's and have had the same job for over 10 years. There are people my age still living with their parents...it's pathetic. And, it's hard for me meet a guy my age from around here who has had a steady job for over 5 years and who doesn't have an ex-wife and a couple of kids to support. Marrying in your 20's should definitely be outlawed.
jk Posted June 4, 2004 Posted June 4, 2004 My ex and I agreed that we would never marry until we were 29-30. I have never EVER even talked about getting married- he's the one that would tell me that I was the only one he could see himself marrying and having kids with. I just don't understand how he can love me wholeheartedly for 3 years and then start getting interested in some 18 year old. Is he chasing after her because he knows she won't ask him for any sort of commitment right now? Because he knows that there is no way they would ever work? It's just something I keep thinking about...
BlockHead Posted June 4, 2004 Posted June 4, 2004 The cost of living is getting higher and higher, and wages haven’t kept the pace. There is also a serious lack of job security. It appears that the demands by women have outpaced the ability of men to meet them.
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