shadowwave Posted February 14, 2012 Posted February 14, 2012 Said by my boyfriend to me....."you are the most normal gf I ever had, you have a job, car, home, are understanding, best sex, make me laugh, we get on so well" Followed by "I love you like a sister" I take that to mean he prefers drama, dysfunctionality and women who have no boundaries and are easily manipulated, with no job and a ton of baggage who put up with his bull. Moving on and letting go is so bloody hard...
Titania22 Posted February 14, 2012 Posted February 14, 2012 Wow, it sounds like he considers sex with his sister normal. Men can be really strange, in a disturbing way.
kaylan Posted February 14, 2012 Posted February 14, 2012 (edited) @OP Um....I thought everything he said was cool until he said the part about loving you like a sister.... Creeeeeppy. Who the hell sexes someone they love like a sister? But what he said doesnt mean he prefers all that negative stuff you spouted on about. Hes simply saying hes used to messed up relationships, and hes glad to have found someone like you. But what the hell is wrong with you? Why would you want to move on from him? @Titania I think the dude just used the wrong wording...as creep as it was to say haha. Some men AND women can be really strange. Oh do I have stories to tell you about some girls Ive dated lolz. Edited February 14, 2012 by kaylan
Author shadowwave Posted February 14, 2012 Author Posted February 14, 2012 Let's just say I wasn't happy with the sister comment. We then had the conversation that even though we have a great friendship, I will not be his friend if/when we break up. He seemed upset. He told me he sent a card today.....I didn't receive it. He told me he is working tonight but is quiet. Has 2 mobiles glued to his hip, he don't get quiet. Why he can't just admit to having met someone else is beyond me!!! I don't know who is the bigger fool....me or him.
Author shadowwave Posted February 14, 2012 Author Posted February 14, 2012 He lies. He gets caught out. He omits telling me things in case so as not to upset me. I haven't met his friends or family. He goes quiet after 10pm and he texts at 10am to say morning. I guess I just need to hear/realise once and for all tonight it would be better to be single.....
kaylan Posted February 14, 2012 Posted February 14, 2012 Let's just say I wasn't happy with the sister comment. We then had the conversation that even though we have a great friendship, I will not be his friend if/when we break up. He seemed upset. He told me he sent a card today.....I didn't receive it. He told me he is working tonight but is quiet. Has 2 mobiles glued to his hip, he don't get quiet. Why he can't just admit to having met someone else is beyond me!!! I don't know who is the bigger fool....me or him. Ok the sister comment was silly, but everything else he said before that sure made it sound like he appreciated the connection you two have. Also, most people dont stay friends with exes after a break up. Its a hard thing to do, especially if feelings are still lingering. However, if you truly suspect he met someone else, then be honest about your insecurity and ask him whats up. Tell him you notice his behavior is a bit off and that youd like him to be honest about whatever happens to be bothering him.
kaylan Posted February 14, 2012 Posted February 14, 2012 I'm missing something here abuot what he prefers. where did he say that? Only you know this guy but, perhaps when he said 'sister', he didn't mean a family 'sister' but rather that he felt emotionally close to you.. you and he understand eachother. He was trying to express a bond of intimacy. I agree with this. He lies. He gets caught out. He omits telling me things in case so as not to upset me. I haven't met his friends or family. He goes quiet after 10pm and he texts at 10am to say morning. I guess I just need to hear/realise once and for all tonight it would be better to be single..... Oh...well you didnt say all this in the OP. Lying is a BIG no no for me. If I catch someone in one lie, Im done right then and there. But what do you catch him out on? And lies of omission are just as bad as outright lies in my opinion. How long have you two been together? That would help in addressing the meeting family and friends part. Is it possible hes sleeping after 10pm? and then texts you once hes at work the next morning? Either way its apparent this relationship isnt working well.
Author shadowwave Posted February 14, 2012 Author Posted February 14, 2012 7 months. I'm still struggling to understand when he says he loves me and doesn't want to upset me why he would think its easier to say nothing about what he is doing, seeing, working than just telling the truth. Says hang in there when he is busy with work. I wouldn't be so insecure otherwise.... It's very hard to walk away.
Oxy Moronovich Posted February 14, 2012 Posted February 14, 2012 How long have you been dating this dude?
Titania22 Posted February 14, 2012 Posted February 14, 2012 @Titania Some men AND women can be really strange. Oh do I have stories to tell you about some girls Ive dated lolz. I love those sorts of stories, please pm me, or start a thread to share. I agree both sexes can be very strange.
Fondue Posted February 15, 2012 Posted February 15, 2012 7 months. I'm still struggling to understand when he says he loves me and doesn't want to upset me why he would think its easier to say nothing about what he is doing, seeing, working than just telling the truth. Says hang in there when he is busy with work. I wouldn't be so insecure otherwise.... It's very hard to walk away. You seem very possessive. These things are not lies, what you stated is him just not informing you of every detail in his life. If a woman expected me to "report in" at every interval of my life, I would leave that relationship as soon as I can, without second thought. He doesn't answer his phone past a certain time because he doesn't want to. He may be sleeping, he may consider it "after hours" for him. I do the same EXACT thing. I refuse to answer my phone or reply to texts past 930. It's just respecting yourself, to shut off the entire world for the evening and not be bothered. Everyone needs alone time. He may also be private. I don't know what the big deal is about not meeting his family. You may want the relationship to be progressed to a certain point. he may be slower. Meeting the parents is a major step, that takes a certain level of commitment-- which you may have, but he doesn't (yet). His statements were obvious of what he feels for you. The sister comment was a little weird, but he probably phrased it wrong. He's telling you that he APPRECIATES your sanity, down to earthness, etc. He's glad he's not dating crazy. But unfortunately from the sounds of this thread, you may be turning into that crazy girl he is trying to avoid.
chelsea2011 Posted February 15, 2012 Posted February 15, 2012 Said by my boyfriend to me....."you are the most normal gf I ever had, you have a job, car, home, are understanding, best sex, make me laugh, we get on so well" Followed by "I love you like a sister" I take that to mean he prefers drama, dysfunctionality and women who have no boundaries and are easily manipulated, with no job and a ton of baggage who put up with his bull. Moving on and letting go is so bloody hard... I had a whole different response typed out because I thought your last line said, "Moving on and letting go of this blow hard." I almost choked on my drink with laughter. I said to myself, "Now there is girl who knows who she is and what she wants! Good for her!" So there ya go...subsitute my line for the one you wrote and carry on girl. He's not worth it.
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