LstinNY Posted February 13, 2012 Posted February 13, 2012 Hi LoveShack crew. This is my first post, although I've browsed the site for quite some time. My girlfriend of 2 years decided to break up with me last Wednesday, which has really hit me like a ton of bricks. Just the week before, she sent a response email to me telling me how much she loves me and how she looks forward to spending many more wonderful years together. She told me, and I agree to some extent, that I have neglected her romantic needs and wants and have been focused on my journalism career. She has been more than supportive of my career efforts but she feels as if they became the focus of the relationship. I'm devastated and angry at myself for being so selfish as to not see this. I wish I would have listen to her subtle hints and gotten the clues. As I said earlier, we live together and I'm wondering if I'm getting mixed signals from her. We also live together and I'm looking to move out as quick as I can to give her the space and time she says she needs. For example, we share the same bed as we only live in a one bedroom and she snuggle up to me for a while before she falls asleep. And she also still kisses me on the lips when I drop her off for work in the morning. I know that I shouldn't get my hopes up and that these actions don't mean anything, but part of me wants to believe that it means she still has a bit of an interest. I genuinely feel terrible about this whole situation and I've shed many tears over losing her. I never meant for things to get this way and I'd like to know if there is anything I can do that can help my chances of getting her back? Thanks in advance to those who respond.
Chi townD Posted February 13, 2012 Posted February 13, 2012 Well, you know where you screwed up. Has she talked to you anymore about it? Is she the one stating that she needs space? Two things come to mind. 1. She's having the case of the G.I.G.S. (grass is greener syndrome) 2. or there's another guy that she's interested in and wants her "space" so she can make a move.
Author LstinNY Posted February 13, 2012 Author Posted February 13, 2012 Well, you know where you screwed up. Has she talked to you anymore about it? Is she the one stating that she needs space? Two things come to mind. 1. She's having the case of the G.I.G.S. (grass is greener syndrome) 2. or there's another guy that she's interested in and wants her "space" so she can make a move. Yes, she's the one stating that she needs space. It could be another guy, but it would surprise me. I really believe it's because she truly feels as if I didn't appreciate her/make time for her relationship needs. She also went home to her family several days before this happened and I know for a fact that she's talked to her sisters about this. I just don't know how to handle it best. It's killing me.
SincereOnlineGuy Posted February 14, 2012 Posted February 14, 2012 I contend that because she is still there in your immediate proximity on a consistent basis, you should tell her directly that SHE bears some responsibility for offering no more than "subtle hints and clues" as to what she wants/needs. If we share a society which lately encourages women to say things like: ""I want to be licked, LIKE THAT!!"" ... which has long evolved away from "(women should bend over backward to please their men, while at the same time requiring no reciprocity)"... THEN IF you are reporting things accurately, SHE needed to be more clear and direct, and YOU needed to allow this every time. (were you not still in such close proximity, the right thing to do would be to move on and learn from your experiences)
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