bubble_pink Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 my ex from two years came back after all her extream behaviour. i found out her mum passed away with cancer and she made a lot of terible mistakes and out of all them she said she was trying to replace me in other people and was trying to get my atention. she is with someone else and we spoke as friends and the convo had died as i wont give over infomation to boost her ego. she tells me that her partner reminds her of me and she has met me on a couple of ocassions not of my choice just by turing up out the blue. we both spilt mutaly there was no cheating and neither of us wanted to split but she wanted other things at the time so to save hardship and a bad falling out we went our seperate ways. what is this person after?
EgoJoe Posted February 13, 2012 Posted February 13, 2012 Guilt relief and looking for a new branch to swing to. Nothing short of I made a mistake and you are the love of my life is good enough to talk to her. Also, don't talk to her when she is in another relationship.
Dark Phoenix Posted February 13, 2012 Posted February 13, 2012 what is this person after? Ask her! None of us are mind readers but if shes showing up out of the blue, shes trying to tell you something
Philosoraptor Posted February 13, 2012 Posted February 13, 2012 It sounds like you split up the right way which is very admirable. But it sounds like she might be unhappy with her current relationship and is testing the waters to see if you would be available. I'm not saying not to date her again, but she needs time alone to heal herself and not use you as an emotional bandaid. If her intentions are as they sound, and you'd be open to trying again, then you need to enforce strong boundaries and make sure she has healed and matured within herself or your relationship is likely to follow the same path.
Author bubble_pink Posted February 14, 2012 Author Posted February 14, 2012 I have spoken to her and it is clear that she feels guilty for leaving and that she is unhappy from time to time in her relationship. this came to light while sitting in her car talking her partner called and she awnserd the phone and put her on mute and her gf was fixated on her ex and where she would be drinking tonight. my ex off loaded a heap of infomation to which i pointed out i can not fix your problems thats up to you as to which i left. I left the relationship loving her and still do she knows of this now it has been two years since the split. having said that she also knows how i respect boundries and relationships and will not entertain any form of contact why she is in one as it is unfair on the other person my ex knows that even though i love her there is nothing to be gained from me. she pushes old issues and retreats by saying she loves her partner and that if she gets cheated on or hurt she will find out the hard way. i figguer she is verry lost and as much as i love i am not the one to help her so i have stoped all contact and continue as normal. as my ex will only contact me when she is floatin on a old feeling when times have got tough for her and she thinks of my once unconditional support.
g450 Posted February 15, 2012 Posted February 15, 2012 My take on this is that the grass was not any greener on the other side and her new boy hurt her so she wants to use you as an emotional tampon. I would just ignore her. She lost that right when she bailed.
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