Concerns regarding Facebook

[usthinker]

Hi everybody,

 

I currently have an inactive account on Facebook (i.e. I only check it a few times a year) and have only one "friend" only because he was insistent I friend him and decided to go ahead and do it at the time. I got back from a trip and met lots of new friends, almost all of who use Facebook. I kind of want to join but have concerns about privacy. It is also hard for me to determine, if I do decide to be more active, how to decide who I should friend and who I shouldn't.

 

What are your thoughts regarding Facebook? Good things and Bad things? Things to be careful about or watch for? Any advice would be greatly appreciated, whether or not you use Facebook.

 

Thanks

[poodle]

I understand the privacy concerns, but the moment you use the net, you give up some of that. Facebook gives you a lot of control over who can view certain information. You can set it to 'only me', 'friends', 'friends of friends', 'public' and 'custom' (people you select). You can also hide your profile from search results and make your friends list private so only you have access to it. Go to 'privacy settings' and play around a bit.

 

The only bad thing I can think of is that all users can see a thumbnail of your profile picture. A few years ago Facebook gave users the option to hide it. It's a shame that it's no longer possible.

 

Enjoy it! It's always fun to catch up with childhood friends.

[oldguy]

Remember, the net is like Vegas, what happens there, stays there, FOREVER! seriously.

[usthinker]

I am beginning to look at Facebook and its privacy policies and will go from there. I do have some concerns, but it seems like so many people are using it these days that I feel left out by not using it, so I can kind of see myself using it some time in the future.

 

At the same time I can see your point about being able to catch up with others and the fact that privacy settings can be adjusted which should help at least some what.

 

I agree with the sentiment totally that what gets posted does stay there forever If we could make money off of all the gossip that occurs on the net (or any group for that matter) I could see us all living the good life now...

 

Thanks once again.

[in_absentia]

My rule is that I only add people who I would stop and talk to in the street, I don't add strangers, acquaintances, or people who are looking to become friends with me. I only add people who are existing friends. And I don't write anything which I would be uncomfortable showing to everybody I love. I also have my privacy set very very high, so prospective employers can't see anything I write.

[HeavenOrHell]

I use a made up name on facebook and everywhere else online.

The thing I don't like about facebook is that you can see what people are writing on other people's walls on your newsfeed and ticker even though you're not friends with them and their wall is private, so everyone can also see what you are writing on other people's walls. So I don't write things as freely as I might if I didn't feel all my friends and could see everything I write outside of my wall.

 

Other than that, I love it!

[Emilia]

My rule is that I only add people who I would stop and talk to in the street, I don't add strangers, acquaintances, or people who are looking to become friends with me. I only add people who are existing friends. And I don't write anything which I would be uncomfortable showing to everybody I love. I also have my privacy set very very high, so prospective employers can't see anything I write.

 

This. I'd also like to add that I don't have embarrassing photos uploaded and generally post what I would be happy with if it was made widely public associated with my name.

 

So just a little decorum and reasonable privacy settings will ensure you don't get into something you regret later.

[creighton0123]

Umm... what is it that you're concerned about, really? Specifics. When it comes to online privacy, don't provide any financial information to non-trusted vendors. Don't use the same password for everything and always use an alphanumeric password.

 

Don't post anything that you wouldn't want other people to see, read, or associate to you. Aside from that, it's pretty safe and straightforward.

[usthinker]

One of the main concerns I have really is not what I say on my page, but rather what other people say on their pages, especially when it pertains to me. Granted, people can already talk about me on Facebook right now, even if I were not a member, but it seems like it would be much less likely if I were not a member.

 

Also I have noticed that people can tag my name to certain posts and/or pictures, without my permission. I know I have control over it at my end, but if I want the tag removed from their Facebook page, I have to send a message over to the person who posted it. If they refuse to do it, I would have to go through the process of "unfriending" them, which seems like something I would not want to do.

 

And talking about "friending" someone on Facebook...how does one handle a situation if a friend request is received from someone you don't want to be "friends" with? I know I could ignore or delete the request, but does that cause some sort of hardship between me and that person?

 

And, lastly, I have been trying to read up on the privacy policy on Facebook and try to figure out how things are organized. I must say that everything looks like it is organized like an index would be organized. It is one of the most un-user friendly sources of info I have run into. There is no tutorial or anything to introduce new users to their service.

 

I am not sure if I am being overly cautious, but I don't want to ruin my reputation, especially when it comes to future employers.

 

If anyone has further comments, I would love to hear them. Otherwise I would finally like to add that I appreciate all the hints and tips everyone has provided thus far. If anyone is so inclined, I would appreciate any insight you could provide on the other post I have written in the family section of this website. I have to warn you that it is on a topic totally unrelated to this one.

 

Once again a BIG thank you to everyone!

[Emilia]

You can't control what others post but if you only friend people whom you trust (I assume you wouldn't be friends with anyone you don't trust in the first place) then surely that's not an issue. What I have with my friends is banter and friendly chat. I have put my settings so that tagging has to be approved by me but nobody has ever attempted to tag me in anything remotely embarrassing.

 

The best way to control what appears about you on facebook is to control whom you friend.

 

I reject any friend requests I don't want OR if it's really awkward, I friend them first and de-friend them a couple of weeks later. Most people have hundreds of friends and they never notice it. It's common too, people's numbers go up and down all the time.

 

You need patience for facebook privacy settings, they try to make it hard for you to use them on purpose because they want people to expose themselves as much as possible. The truth is though, most of us don't have that much to expose in the first place (except for information that could be used for identity theft, you have to be careful with that).

[SincereOnlineGuy]

Hi everybody,

 

I currently have an inactive account on Facebook (i.e. I only check it a few times a year) and have only one "friend" only because he was insistent I friend him and decided to go ahead and do it at the time. I got back from a trip and met lots of new friends, almost all of who use Facebook. I kind of want to join but have concerns about privacy. It is also hard for me to determine, if I do decide to be more active, how to decide who I should friend and who I shouldn't.

 

What are your thoughts regarding Facebook? Good things and Bad things? Things to be careful about or watch for? Any advice would be greatly appreciated, whether or not you use Facebook.

 

Thanks

 

 

 

Just plain DON'T use it...

 

for reasons not the least of which is that they effectively make you disclose your full, true, first and last names. Why there was even some guy named "Ahmed Rushdie" who, for the longest time, couldn't even get the morons at Facebook to allow him to use his far more/('less'?) popular middle name, "Salman" (Rushdie). He practically had to win a court battle...

 

Ultimately, Facebook just encourages you to foolishly compile all of your personal details in one spot so that anybody with any interest in you at all has a much easier time tracking down every minute bit of data about you.

 

Example: The other day I recalled a truly stunning, young adult woman I'd seen at a certain establishment. So I googled the name of that establishment and the woman's first name (which was ALL I knew). Sure enough, on her Facebook account she'd listed that establishment among her favorites, and there were photos of her to clarify I had the right person.

 

From there it was a cinch to find her last name, her home address, her date of birth, and scores of pictures of her. It was barely a challenge - since she herself compiled so much of that data in one spot. (and I say that while being someone who has never HAD a Facebook account - how much more data is available about many more people to those who HAVE such an account??)

 

Facebook just encourages people to practice truly senseless behavior. Remember all of those admonitions about remaining anonymous on the internet??? - Well they're the first things out the window on Facebook.

 

And who you "friend" is a question long beyond the point where you've already compiled enough of your own data in one spot to potentially damage you later.

 

Not only that, but then there is the occasional story of a Facebook witch hunt wherein some terrible citizen does something to spark the ire of his community, only to be targeted by scores of Facebook users. Unfortunately those with the same or similar names in other states and countries can often be the fully mistaken targets of such verbal attacks.

 

Here is something from Microsoft related to online data and privacy, which might be worth a reminder:

 

blogs.technet.com/b/microsoft_blog/archive/2012/01/24/microsoft-amp-data-privacy-day-put-your-best-digital-foot-forward.aspx

 

(I tried to remove the 'link' element of that for fear of this dumb LS website banning my posts for X days while determining the legitimacy of that offering --- vs. spam counterparts)

 

 

Be careful out there...

[WhatTheHeck702]

Stay away from Facebook! I had it and when my ex became bitter used my photos on it to use for another website.

[darkmoon]

u don't have to post your secrets on it or photos of yourself either

[Emilia]

I think anyone that discloses too much private information is looking for trouble but it doesn't need to be that way.

 

I don't have my address on facebook, I've put an incorrect date of birth in their database (the year is correct but not the day and month) and it isn't displayed on my profile. It shows my phone number and one of my email addresses to my friends, not to strangers. Both of those are already in the public domain since I use them for job searches. Facebook is not less safe than the countless recruitment agencies that already have that email address and phone number.

 

Out of the photos I have, about a dozen show my face, the rest are of my friends or of interesting landscapes because I used to travel a lot. I suppose if anyone ever used face recognition software on some they could find me but even my own company posts photos of me online.

 

You can control what data you provide and you can control what you display as well.

[usthinker]

Just plain DON'T use it...

 

for reasons not the least of which is that they effectively make you disclose your full, true, first and last names. Why there was even some guy named "Ahmed Rushdie" who, for the longest time, couldn't even get the morons at Facebook to allow him to use his far more/('less'?) popular middle name, "Salman" (Rushdie). He practically had to win a court battle...

 

Ultimately, Facebook just encourages you to foolishly compile all of your personal details in one spot so that anybody with any interest in you at all has a much easier time tracking down every minute bit of data about you.

 

Example: The other day I recalled a truly stunning, young adult woman I'd seen at a certain establishment. So I googled the name of that establishment and the woman's first name (which was ALL I knew). Sure enough, on her Facebook account she'd listed that establishment among her favorites, and there were photos of her to clarify I had the right person.

 

From there it was a cinch to find her last name, her home address, her date of birth, and scores of pictures of her. It was barely a challenge - since she herself compiled so much of that data in one spot. (and I say that while being someone who has never HAD a Facebook account - how much more data is available about many more people to those who HAVE such an account??)

 

Facebook just encourages people to practice truly senseless behavior. Remember all of those admonitions about remaining anonymous on the internet??? - Well they're the first things out the window on Facebook.

 

And who you "friend" is a question long beyond the point where you've already compiled enough of your own data in one spot to potentially damage you later.

 

Not only that, but then there is the occasional story of a Facebook witch hunt wherein some terrible citizen does something to spark the ire of his community, only to be targeted by scores of Facebook users. Unfortunately those with the same or similar names in other states and countries can often be the fully mistaken targets of such verbal attacks.

 

Here is something from Microsoft related to online data and privacy, which might be worth a reminder:

 

blogs.technet.com/b/microsoft_blog/archive/2012/01/24/microsoft-amp-data-privacy-day-put-your-best-digital-foot-forward.aspx

 

(I tried to remove the 'link' element of that for fear of this dumb LS website banning my posts for X days while determining the legitimacy of that offering --- vs. spam counterparts)

 

 

Be careful out there...

 

It is a little disturbing that you were able to find out all of that information with just the person's first name and the name of an establishment she frequented. It does seem like she put a lot of info on the site and made it public. I can definitely see concern about this type of exposure and will keep this in mind as I decide whether or not to keep using Facebook in the coming weeks.

 

You can't control what others post but if you only friend people whom you trust (I assume you wouldn't be friends with anyone you don't trust in the first place) then surely that's not an issue. What I have with my friends is banter and friendly chat. I have put my settings so that tagging has to be approved by me but nobody has ever attempted to tag me in anything remotely embarrassing.

 

The best way to control what appears about you on facebook is to control whom you friend.

 

I reject any friend requests I don't want OR if it's really awkward, I friend them first and de-friend them a couple of weeks later. Most people have hundreds of friends and they never notice it. It's common too, people's numbers go up and down all the time.

 

You need patience for facebook privacy settings, they try to make it hard for you to use them on purpose because they want people to expose themselves as much as possible. The truth is though, most of us don't have that much to expose in the first place (except for information that could be used for identity theft, you have to be careful with that).

 

 

I think anyone that discloses too much private information is looking for trouble but it doesn't need to be that way.

 

I don't have my address on facebook, I've put an incorrect date of birth in their database (the year is correct but not the day and month) and it isn't displayed on my profile. It shows my phone number and one of my email addresses to my friends, not to strangers. Both of those are already in the public domain since I use them for job searches. Facebook is not less safe than the countless recruitment agencies that already have that email address and phone number.

 

Out of the photos I have, about a dozen show my face, the rest are of my friends or of interesting landscapes because I used to travel a lot. I suppose if anyone ever used face recognition software on some they could find me but even my own company posts photos of me online.

 

You can control what data you provide and you can control what you display as well.

 

Thanks for your advice Emilia. As a trial run, I am friending a few people at a time to see what things are like. I have also limited the amount of info I place on Facebook, as well as set the privacy settings fairly high.

 

To Emilia, Whattheheck, and Dark Moon--I have not put any pictures on yet, but was thinking about it at some point. I probably won't use a real picture in my public profile, but rather have them some place where only friends can see them.

 

To Dark Moon--I am definately going to be careful and try not to post secrets.

 

I will continue to welcome any other comments people have on this subject in the coming weeks.

 

Thanks.

[goldengirl11]

I had a wierd thing which happened to me towards the end of last year when a man I was getting to know looked me up on Facebook and mentioned that he had read my wall - when realised that I hadn't accepted him as a 'friend' yet and am positive had set my privacy settings so that 'friends' could only read that info. Regrettably, I didn't report it at the time but undid the settings and immediately set them again. Then wierdly that man (who I am trying to shake off regardless) had deleted himself off Facebook as if he may have only registered to see my profile!

Edited February 16, 2012 by goldengirl11

[FitChick]

Because they are always changing the security and privacy settings and telling you later, I deleted my profile and now have a fake one that is empty except for basics (I pretend to be an elderly man) that I use to read other people's pages, generally public figures whom I follow.

[Art_Critic]

Example: The other day I recalled a truly stunning, young adult woman I'd seen at a certain establishment. So I googled the name of that establishment and the woman's first name (which was ALL I knew). Sure enough, on her Facebook account she'd listed that establishment among her favorites, and there were photos of her to clarify I had the right person.

 

From there it was a cinch to find her last name, her home address, her date of birth, and scores of pictures of her. It was barely a challenge - since she herself compiled so much of that data in one spot. (and I say that while being someone who has never HAD a Facebook account - how much more data is available about many more people to those who HAVE such an account??)

 

 

The flip side to that is the info that you found out may not be true...

 

My birthplace on my FB isn't correct.. I was actually born in a suburb..

My birthdate isn't shown.

My name whoever is real.. but who cares if someone knows my name...

My name and my profile pict. is ALL you can find out from my FB account unless you are one of my friends..

 

Now the other side of that SOG is that what you did was just creepy.. plain creepy...

Maybe that could show as to why putting incorrect data on your FB account might not be a bad idea...

Edited February 16, 2012 by Art_Critic