Sugarkane Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 When I see how many people on here were cheated on, betrayed or just downright treated like crap like I was, it makes me depressed. Everyone tells you to do the right thing on here. Yet the cheaters/users always end up happy with their next victim. Sometimes they even marry the person they did the cheating with. Yet they didn't have any morals.
EgoJoe Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 Because justice, morality, empathy etc. are human concepts not universal laws. While you might think of yourself as a single entity you are in fact a multitude of entities. The connotations of that reality are staggering. Emotional decisions, logic, rationalizations and the ego all factor in to our decisions. Some less than others and sometimes we disregard. The other day I came in contact with my own darker side and let out a lot of negativity. It helped in some ways and created new problems. I still have yet to see if the net relief is higher than the net grief. I am still torn and holding on to negativity and I want to let it go. It is a difficult process.
Exit Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 Just another aspect of society going down the drain. Really, we have no idea if people's behavior has changed, or if its simply that prior to technology invading all areas of our lives, maybe past generations just didn't let their personal business out into the open, and it wasn't as common to hear that someone had cheated or broken up or had some other sort of problem. Now information spreads in a matter of seconds and everyone wants to be their own reality star by posting all of their dirty laundry on Facebook and everywhere else. That may account for part of it, it may have been common before but people just didn't talk about these things, but I wouldn't totally chalk it up to that. I'd say people's behavior definitely has changed. Everything in life these days is "don't like it? get a new one. can't afford it? charge it. can't pay your bills? declare bankrupcy." People are able to cheat their way through life in ways that weren't possible before, so why not cheat on relationships as well. Sick of your significant other. Well, who cares, you don't have to dump them, at least not until you know you have someone else lined up to keep you warm. It's upsetting to me too, and I know everyone who goes through a breakup goes through the period of "I'm never going to date again", and I'm not going to be melodramatic enough to claim that I will never share a relationship in my life again, but I'm seriously turned off to it all for the time being. I try to look around on dating websites and just find myself disgusted more than interested. People suck. Broken families raised broken children who now have no idea what it takes to have an adult relationship. I'm not claiming to be above this standard that I'm setting, my family was far from perfect and I'm sure I have my issues too, but I at least have the decency to know that I would never cheat, and I put effort into my relationships. Other people just don't care. Either it doesn't bother them, or it was never programmed into them at all and they don't even understand that they are doing anything wrong. Time to be single for a while. Maybe if I keep my standards higher, some day I'll find a one-in-a-million out there.
carhill Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 Why are people so morally bankrupt? IMO, it's the lowest common denominator. In today's world, lest one has special gifts which inure one to society, doing the 'right' thing generally results in mediocrity or being left behind. I face it every day in business. I saw it in my M. I had to make some tough decisions when caregiving to deal with the government. Doing the right thing is admirable but only works when others do the same. Otherwise, you end up under the bear and the bear eats you. That's it.
Tony T Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 IMO, it's the lowest common denominator. In today's world, lest one has special gifts which inure one to society, doing the 'right' thing generally results in mediocrity or being left behind. I face it every day in business. I saw it in my M. I had to make some tough decisions when caregiving to deal with the government. Doing the right thing is admirable but only works when others do the same. Otherwise, you end up under the bear and the bear eats you. That's it. What you have written is both very true and very sad. The standard for ethics and morals is written for each person by each person based on how they were raised, primarily, and so many these days receive little or no moral training. To the words "true" and "sad" I add "scary."
wuggle Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 (edited) I think saying people are morally bankrupt is being a bit harsh, especially when it comes to the arena of relationships and sex. Sex is considered by many to be one of, if not the, prime motivating factor in human (and many other animals) existence. There are many examples from the animal world where, if morality could be applied (which I don't believe it can) you would bemoan the morals as demonic. Spiders which eat their mate after copulation, so some spiders 'learnt' to snap off their penis just after ejaculating, many animals will kill the offspring of another mate to give theirs a better chance of survival...imagine those discussions on LS If you cast your mind back over human history only a few thousand years ago, rape and murder was commonplace. There was little talk of 'cheating' just surviving. Then society formed and the common agreement was sets of laws which lessened these outrages. Then religion came along and tried to introduce more guidelines on morality and things changed again. Western society does now seem to be waking up to the inconsistencies inherant in religion and abandoning it. This is a slow process, and some would argue that it is leaving a 'moral vacuum'. I would argue the opposite. I think we are just going through a transitional period of change, new laws seem to be able to protect society just as good as religious instructions. I'm pretty sure I have read that the number of violent crimes, murders etc has been steadily falling. And maybe, improved communications (like the internet & sites like this) might be helping society moderate itself. But I suspect the issue of sexual relations will always be much as it is now, if it is a subconscious drive to mate as much as we can get away with, so that our genes are passed on, then I think we don't do too badly as a species if we manage to moderate our desires in any way at all, our subconscious is a very powerful thing. Edited February 12, 2012 by wuggle
oldguy Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 When I see how many people on here were cheated on, betrayed or just downright treated like crap like I was, it makes me depressed. Everyone tells you to do the right thing on here. Yet the cheaters/users always end up happy with their next victim. Sometimes they even marry the person they did the cheating with. Yet they didn't have any morals. Well, for one thing this is a forum for people with problems. If you want a wider net cast IMO media & entertainment have a great deal to do with it. People believe what they see even if it is the condensed carnage of the media or the over dramatized entertainment world. We see it so we believe it & practice what is preached to us. That & its pretty much always been there just not so much in your face.
Lostinlife4now Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 People are morally bankrupt because they just don't give a s... anymore!!!
EspressoTorte Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 Just another aspect of society going down the drain. Really, we have no idea if people's behavior has changed, or if its simply that prior to technology invading all areas of our lives, maybe past generations just didn't let their personal business out into the open, and it wasn't as common to hear that someone had cheated or broken up or had some other sort of problem. Now information spreads in a matter of seconds and everyone wants to be their own reality star by posting all of their dirty laundry on Facebook and everywhere else. That may account for part of it, it may have been common before but people just didn't talk about these things, but I wouldn't totally chalk it up to that. I'd say people's behavior definitely has changed. Everything in life these days is "don't like it? get a new one. can't afford it? charge it. can't pay your bills? declare bankrupcy." People are able to cheat their way through life in ways that weren't possible before, so why not cheat on relationships as well. Sick of your significant other. Well, who cares, you don't have to dump them, at least not until you know you have someone else lined up to keep you warm. It's upsetting to me too, and I know everyone who goes through a breakup goes through the period of "I'm never going to date again", and I'm not going to be melodramatic enough to claim that I will never share a relationship in my life again, but I'm seriously turned off to it all for the time being. I try to look around on dating websites and just find myself disgusted more than interested. People suck. Broken families raised broken children who now have no idea what it takes to have an adult relationship. I'm not claiming to be above this standard that I'm setting, my family was far from perfect and I'm sure I have my issues too, but I at least have the decency to know that I would never cheat, and I put effort into my relationships. Other people just don't care. Either it doesn't bother them, or it was never programmed into them at all and they don't even understand that they are doing anything wrong. Time to be single for a while. Maybe if I keep my standards higher, some day I'll find a one-in-a-million out there. All of this, I'm sad to say. All you can do is put out into the world what you would want to get back in return. That's the route I'm sticking to.
fificremefarben Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 Personally, I think it's just harder to satisfy people these days. People aren't really happy with what they've got anymore...they're always seeking the next big thing. It is something that has invaded everyday life, I think, not just within the romantic sphere. Think about it, we change our phones to the newest models, keep up with the latest fashions, want the latest gadegets...so why shouldn't the same be true of our lovers. It's the kind of thing that makes me wonder what the point is in even trying to hold onto a relationship. Maybe that sounds cynical, but it makes sense to me.
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 12, 2012 Posted February 12, 2012 I'm not morally bankrupt, and I have some very honorable people in my life. We're not the only ones. Don't focus on the negative. Try to be more positive yourself, too. If you embrace the bitterness you are only going to stay closer to all the bad stuff. Be open to seeing and experiencing the good, also.
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