Does she even like me? - why the back off?

[BlueKnight21]

I've come on here to try and get some understanding to what is going on. I work with this girl in Peterborogh, who unfortunately is already seeing someone. We've worked together for years and we grew closer as a result. For months we have text each other everyday getting to know each other better and better, playing 20 questions and joking/flirting. Texts used to start at 7am and go on until 8pm. I'm not ashamed to admit that I initiate the text all the time, but she responds and carries on the talk.

 

It all came to a point recently when during one of our daily conversations we both admitted an attraction to each other. I immediately felt bad about this because as I mentioned she is spoken for and I do not want to be 'that guy' so once I admitted liking her, I made sure she knew that I didn't want it to ruin our friendship. If anything this made her talk to me more and she invited me to a meeting the next day outside the office seeing a client. That day was the best of my life, we had coffee in the morning, met the client, went out for lunch, text into the small hours of the evening - it really was amazing to know her like that and just be so happy spending time with her. I kept talking to her as normal over the next few days, but something was suddenly off. A few weeks go by and now she still talks to me, but the closeness we shared in those texts has gone, there's no flirting, no joking, just general chat about work and a few question to get to know each other more. She was ill for a while and was looked after by her bf so I don't know if this has impacted our friendship. It drove me crazy, I just wanted to go back to how we were before, so I began to feel like my liking her had ruined our friendship. One day I just asked her over the phone if it was still OK to talk to her everyday because I felt things weren't as they were. She let me know she always wanted to talk with me, but didn't want to talk about our feelings. Now weeks later we've just been talking and it seems we still make an effort, but the spark is no longer there - and I just do not understand what I did to make it go? A few times she has not replied to texts now and I've yet to see her because she is working in another area at the moment but will be back soon. Was it simply a case of as soon as I admitted liking her she got bored? Why spend the whole day with me only to go cold after? I said/did nothing bad on that day we were out of the office that I know of...and we ended that day texting and still liking each other

 

So please, someone tell me what I did wrong here? Did she like me? Why this friendship/more has suddenly changed?

[Easyguy14]

I've come on here to try and get some understanding to what is going on. I work with this girl in Peterborogh, who unfortunately is already seeing someone. We've worked together for years and we grew closer as a result. For months we have text each other everyday getting to know each other better and better, playing 20 questions and joking/flirting. Texts used to start at 7am and go on until 8pm. I'm not ashamed to admit that I initiate the text all the time, but she responds and carries on the talk.

 

It all came to a point recently when during one of our daily conversations we both admitted an attraction to each other. I immediately felt bad about this because as I mentioned she is spoken for and I do not want to be 'that guy' so once I admitted liking her, I made sure she knew that I didn't want it to ruin our friendship. If anything this made her talk to me more and she invited me to a meeting the next day outside the office seeing a client. That day was the best of my life, we had coffee in the morning, met the client, went out for lunch, text into the small hours of the evening - it really was amazing to know her like that and just be so happy spending time with her. I kept talking to her as normal over the next few days, but something was suddenly off. A few weeks go by and now she still talks to me, but the closeness we shared in those texts has gone, there's no flirting, no joking, just general chat about work and a few question to get to know each other more. She was ill for a while and was looked after by her bf so I don't know if this has impacted our friendship. It drove me crazy, I just wanted to go back to how we were before, so I began to feel like my liking her had ruined our friendship. One day I just asked her over the phone if it was still OK to talk to her everyday because I felt things weren't as they were. She let me know she always wanted to talk with me, but didn't want to talk about our feelings. Now weeks later we've just been talking and it seems we still make an effort, but the spark is no longer there - and I just do not understand what I did to make it go? A few times she has not replied to texts now and I've yet to see her because she is working in another area at the moment but will be back soon. Was it simply a case of as soon as I admitted liking her she got bored? Why spend the whole day with me only to go cold after? I said/did nothing bad on that day we were out of the office that I know of...and we ended that day texting and still liking each other

 

So please, someone tell me what I did wrong here? Did she like me? Why this friendship/more has suddenly changed?

 

I think its fair to say that she realized where things stand with you and her boyfriend so its not your fault. things might've gotten awkward so she backed off to save face. dont make a big deal out of it.