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Posted

I'm trying to decide if I should stay and fight for a (currently) failing relationship, or cut my losses and end it. We have a child, so it's not a decision I want to make lightly.

 

There's been no infidelity, no abuse, no nastiness of any kind. Just the constant daily grind of life over several years, we've both changed a lot, we were very young when we met and I definitely was not in the right place to begin a relationship so we have shaky foundations.

 

In one sense life together is easy and familiar, which makes it even harder to try and fix what is wrong as there's no 'one thing', it's just tedious and depressing. I feel like we've taken all we can from this relationship and we've both grown, but apart rather than together. We are trying, both willing to fight... but maybe there's nothing here worth saving...

 

If you've been the one to call it a day, how on earth did you manage to make that decision? And live through any wobbles you've had since the break-up that maybe you've done the wrong thing? (as I'm sure that would happen to me, I ALWAYS second guess myself!)

Posted

I think you need to look at the pro's and con's of your current relationship. Look deeply at what is causing your unhappiness and decide on whether or not it can be fixed, and if fixing it would make you happy enough to want to continue to try. But you really need to talk to your partner about this and ask that they do the same. You need to communicate your issues openly and work towards either fixing it or an amicable split.

Posted

The child's relationship is separate & first. Everyone changes, everyone grows. You will either work daily to grow together or you will grow apart. You both need to get into relationship counselling yesterday! Your the classic couple that need relationship counselling. Successful relationships are a life style of using the proper tools. Read the books later, that's more a part of maintenance, get a certified counselor who deals with family & relationships. Please.

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