spookie Posted February 8, 2012 Posted February 8, 2012 What's love all about for you people? Is it the comfort of your lover's arms, his warm body in bed after a long s!htty day, someone to stay in on rainy days with? Is it knowing you have a shoulder to cry on were something to go terribly wrong; someone to take care of you if you got sick? Is love like insurance? A security blanket to hold on to? Is the primary reason we pair up, to protect ourselves against the lows, to have someone who'll stand by us, no matter what, making our lives more comfortable with their reassurance? Or is love the recognition of a kindred spirit, a special connection, staying up till 5 AM to talk and never running out of things to say? Is it stimulating, intoxicating, does it enable you to dream? Is it the flip side of fear, knowing you'd be crushed to lose the other person, having longed for him before you even met? What's the primary objective? Does it need to be both? Which one is harder to find? Is one or the other something you can develop?
ThaWholigan Posted February 8, 2012 Posted February 8, 2012 What's love all about for you people? Is it the comfort of your lover's arms, his warm body in bed after a long s!htty day, someone to stay in on rainy days with? Is it knowing you have a shoulder to cry on were something to go terribly wrong; someone to take care of you if you got sick? Is love like insurance? A security blanket to hold on to? Is the primary reason we pair up, to protect ourselves against the lows, to have someone who'll stand by us, no matter what, making our lives more comfortable with their reassurance? Or is love the recognition of a kindred spirit, a special connection, staying up till 5 AM to talk and never running out of things to say? Is it stimulating, intoxicating, does it enable you to dream? Is it the flip side of fear, knowing you'd be crushed to lose the other person, having longed for him before you even met? What's the primary objective? Does it need to be both? Which one is harder to find? Is one or the other something you can develop? I imagine that it can be developed in some cases, and that also a cycle of both elements simultaneously over time is perhaps the best combination. I think it depends on the person and what they respond too. Some people find comfort stimulating, so I'd imagine comfort would be preferable. However, some people like excitement and drama makes them stimulated. Some girls like to argue just so they can have crazy angry sex with their man, I could imagine being like that with a woman as I have a pretty explosive temperament when it comes to arguing
oldguy Posted February 8, 2012 Posted February 8, 2012 Does the kindred spirit have anything to do with what some call the soul mate? I would think that special connection, never running out of things to say, is something that has to be worked on a lot harder & it may even result in comfort.
Ninjainpajamas Posted February 8, 2012 Posted February 8, 2012 For me, love is not necessarily those things you mentioned. Nothing you said there is necessarily compelling and emotions I couldn't satisfy let's say with someone who I was FWB's with or in some kind of a wishy washy pseudo relationship. Love is something altogether different, which I think why many people think that because they feel that way then they must be in love with somebody. Real love is an emotion that transcends all of those experiences and is what makes that particular experience more impacting than others. For example, you might love children and take care of them and be able to appreciate them...however I presume that when they are your own a whole set of another emotions takes place which negates a lot of the "average" feelings, feelings that before experiencing that were profound however that was just based off your limited or unfamiliar experience. True love is something that makes all of those intimate experiences and emotions just one big part of the larger pie, they're the slices not the pie itself which is how many people live. It's something that feels greater than your own desire to protect yourself or limit yourself by ones own preset limitations, it's something trusting and which requires no faith because you are not trying to believe, you merely do...and there's no doubts or questions that you have to turn a blind eye in order to do so. It comes from within side of you and overcomes and overtakes you, not because you are trying to form a connection with someone or make someone feel important in your life, but because you feel mutually engulfed in the experience. So for me love is real love, not the fake watered down version that most people indulge in because somebody can hold them and has a beating heart so therefore that somehow makes the experience special. You can try to manifest those elements into your relationship, but what you're really trying to do is infuse and create love, romance, and passion when If it's the right person then all those things come naturally. This is my opinion anyway, I've been in a lot of experiences of "love" and can replicate a lot of situations and emotions with people that appear to be it, however I know what the pinnacle is, and because of that I don't really crave the elements described in this post by themselves.
norajane Posted February 8, 2012 Posted February 8, 2012 For me, real love isn't about what I "get". It's about giving of myself. The more of myself that I want to give to a person and to the relationship, the more love I have for that person. I don't give to people I don't love. And getting from them is "worthless" if I don't love them and don't want to give of myself to them. Does that make sense?
Feelin Frisky Posted February 8, 2012 Posted February 8, 2012 Love is continuing to "want" someone after you have them. Before you have them, it's "romance" which is a lot of want but not really love. Love is after you've bonded and keep wanting the person for all the personal reasons that make you happy. I love someone. Why did I start to love her? Because she tuned me in where others often tune me out. She made and makes time for me even though she has plenty of other concerns. She has tried to grow to know me for me and that I am not just a unit of manhood who will treat her by some written script with dominance and harshness. She makes me feel like I matter like no one else does and cares to repair the bond when something damages it--especially when she has faltered. She's an admirable mother to her children who is very conscientious which is a super thing even if the children are not mine because a good mother means so much to her children and I have a conscientious mother who is a rock of dependability. I love her voice, her manner, her smile, her humor, her openness, her absence of negative judgmentalism, her height, her vulnerability at times and her fearfulness of certain things is endearing and makes me feel protective and masculine. She may read this and think I'm too gaga for her and will fall to pieces if she decides we must part but I'll survive and just go on being joyful that she is being the wonderful person she is and will always be a love-worthy and trust-worthy woman as long as she's alive. I am not a religious person but I pray in my heart for the means to sustain our bond and keep her and her children safe. Thank god she doesn't have bad breath or wicked stank or I'd have to take it all back.
Forever Learning Posted February 9, 2012 Posted February 9, 2012 Now that is something beautiful indeed, your sweet love. What a blessing, I couldn't ask for more. Thank you.
Feelin Frisky Posted February 9, 2012 Posted February 9, 2012 Now that is something beautiful indeed, your sweet love. What a blessing, I couldn't ask for more. Thank you. Sorry for clowning at the end.
runner Posted February 10, 2012 Posted February 10, 2012 For me, real love isn't about what I "get". It's about giving of myself. The more of myself that I want to give to a person and to the relationship, the more love I have for that person. I don't give to people I don't love. And getting from them is "worthless" if I don't love them and don't want to give of myself to them. Does that make sense? makes perfect sense
Recommended Posts