nothappyjan Posted February 7, 2012 Posted February 7, 2012 Been dating a guy for about 7 weeks. It feels like a very slow moving relationship, we have steady plans to catch up once a weeknight and once on the weekend. We have not been intimate, just very basic stuff. We haven't met one anothers friends/family and we always do nice dates and he is keen to pay and picks me up etc. We havent discussed exclusivtity or anything, it has never come up. It just feels like we havent moved forward much since the first few dates. We have heaps in common, live close and he is very PDA when we are out and about etc. We still don't talk every day, mainly just when we plan our next date. I just am used to moving a bit more quickly. I can't figure out if he is just being shy (which he is kinda) or whether he is just filling time while he looks for someone else. I find myself starting to develop feelings and don't like not knowing what he is thinking. What do you guys think,
Emilia Posted February 7, 2012 Posted February 7, 2012 I remember your mentioning it in previous posts that you don't initiate contact with men you date because you are too scared to get involved too soon. Maybe he isn't getting enough encouragement from you? If you aren't being intimate much after about 2 months maybe he is losing interest.
Author nothappyjan Posted February 7, 2012 Author Posted February 7, 2012 I remember your mentioning it in previous posts that you don't initiate contact with men you date because you are too scared to get involved too soon. Maybe he isn't getting enough encouragement from you? If you aren't being intimate much after about 2 months maybe he is losing interest. I only don't initiate in the first few dates. I have been taking turns contacting him first and planning dates now so that can't be it. The intimate thing goes both ways. I'm always very keen but he stops with kissing and thats it. He admitted he is very conservative and isn't keen on sleeping with someone until they are in a relationship but at the same time he hasn't made any murmurs towards forming a relationship yet.
Author nothappyjan Posted February 7, 2012 Author Posted February 7, 2012 I remember your mentioning it in previous posts that you don't initiate contact with men you date because you are too scared to get involved too soon. Maybe he isn't getting enough encouragement from you? If you aren't being intimate much after about 2 months maybe he is losing interest. I only don't initiate in the first 5 or so dates. I have been taking turns contacting him first and planning dates now so that can't be it. The intimate thing goes both ways. I'm always very keen but he stops with kissing and thats it. He admitted he is very conservative and isn't keen on sleeping with someone until they are in a relationship which i agree with but at the same time he hasn't made any murmurs towards forming a relationship yet.
Emilia Posted February 7, 2012 Posted February 7, 2012 I suppose I don't understand why you are asking us instead of asking him. If he is this conservative though when it comes to sex, he might not suit you as a long term partner if you are more liberal.
veggirl Posted February 7, 2012 Posted February 7, 2012 OP, you need to ask him about this. Just ask if you are exclusive. I think 2 mos is just the right time to make things official. If he doesn't want it now, he isn't going to want it, I don't think. So just ask him! Do you guys hang out at each others homes too? Or is it formal dates each time?
xpaperxcutx Posted February 7, 2012 Posted February 7, 2012 Invite him over to your place for dinner, cook for him, have a few glasses of wine, then jump his bones. Problem solved.
Imajerk17 Posted February 7, 2012 Posted February 7, 2012 (edited) I'm not sure any guy is going to be rushing to get seriously involved with someone who nicknames herself "not happy" (your screen name and your avatar which has a heart shape with a crack down the middle). Maybe it is your persona just on here, but maybe not. I am wondering what kind of vibe you give across to this guy and others IRL. From your posts you do come across as an "emotional heavy". Edited February 7, 2012 by Imajerk17
Oxy Moronovich Posted February 8, 2012 Posted February 8, 2012 I'm not sure any guy is going to be rushing to get seriously involved with someone who nicknames herself "not happy" (your screen name and your avatar which has a heart shape with a crack down the middle). Maybe it is your persona just on here, but maybe not. I am wondering what kind of vibe you give across to this guy and others IRL. From your posts you do come across as an "emotional heavy". Good point. Maybe something about her personality is off-putting.
MGD3 Posted February 8, 2012 Posted February 8, 2012 Invite him over to your place for dinner, cook for him, have a few glasses of wine, then jump his bones. Problem solved. OP - Do what xpapercutx says!! Wish more women would be like that!
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