beenburned Posted February 4, 2012 Posted February 4, 2012 Well, it's that time of year again. I am celebrating another year of life, good health, wonderful grown children, and loving grandkids! But you know as I look back with hindsight, my perceptions of what I thought my marriage would be like was seriously altered. Call me young, naive, sheltered, but I never imagined I would live through all that has happened to me in my lifetime. Make me feel good, tell me I wasn't the only one that was delusional about marriage. If everyone knew in the beginning, just what all they would go through, many people would be too scarred to ever get married. So, how has your journey compared to what you thought it would be?
frozensprouts Posted February 5, 2012 Posted February 5, 2012 call me stupid, but i never really thought much about it,not in any kind of concrete terms anyway. I expected there would be challenges and times we did not agree, but we do see eye to eye on an awful lot of things, and we were mostly happy and had a lot of fun together. I never want much as far as material items go ( apparently this makes it hard to find me a birthday gift, as there's not a whole lot that i want:laugh:), but I put a really high premium on the intangibles of life ( family, friends, love, companionship, the chance to do good work for others, etc.) We still do have a lot of fun together, and I am very happy, but our marriage has been nothing if not challenging and full of the unexpected
frozensprouts Posted February 5, 2012 Posted February 5, 2012 Well, it's that time of year again. I am celebrating another year of life, good health, wonderful grown children, and loving grandkids! But you know as I look back with hindsight, my perceptions of what I thought my marriage would be like was seriously altered. Call me young, naive, sheltered, but I never imagined I would live through all that has happened to me in my lifetime. Make me feel good, tell me I wasn't the only one that was delusional about marriage. If everyone knew in the beginning, just what all they would go through, many people would be too scarred to ever get married. So, how has your journey compared to what you thought it would be? By the way.... a very happy birthday to you...may the coming year bring you many good things ( and one very minor no so great thing to help you appreciate the good:laugh:)
g450 Posted February 5, 2012 Posted February 5, 2012 Happy birthday! Yeah I noticed that a lot of divorces and affairs happen at the mid life stages. I guess most of us re-evaluate our lives at that point since we are reminded of our mortality. My XW turned 50 six years ago. There were a lot of signs I did not heed like her wanting a sports car, no emotions at her own fathers funeral or at our only Son leaving home. Her getting a bit too cozy with her old High School Friends over the internet. Her menopaus and her nasty disposition towards me the past five or years of our marriage etc etc. Some of us are blind and then blindsided. It's sad. But Im pretty happy in my life now and guess what...Ill be 50 in a few months myself. And although my body does show it's age Im still the same guy I was when I was 25, only my relationship skills are much improved as are my awareness. Enjoy your birthday.
Afishwithabike Posted February 5, 2012 Posted February 5, 2012 Happy Birthday! Marriage isn't for sissies. It's the biggest roller-coaster you'll ride in your lifetime.
Author beenburned Posted February 5, 2012 Author Posted February 5, 2012 Thank you all for the well wishes! g, Life throws us curve balls whether married or not. You learn to roll with the punches.(whether you like it or not) I do agree that mid-life is a time when you think about where you've been, and where you're going in the future. You tend to plan more because you don't want to waste the years you have left. Menopause is especially challenging for women, as the hormones control everything in our body. But when it is all over, a woman is much less emotion driven, and more rational thinking. I even wondered if this was what men felt like all along.
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