Freddys Posted February 2, 2012 Posted February 2, 2012 Hi people, Months after "dating" - "seeing" this woman I can tell for sure she is using the reverse psychology game. Most of the times she says exactly the opposite from what she really means or wants. Never speaks clear and she prefers me to read her mind, which means she wants to see if I do really care about her. (but truth is I really do care). Moreover, she is always using another technique and trying to appear that i'm the one wanting her and not the opposite. There was many chances (some good ones) to kiss her but I didn't, cause I was aware of this game playing. But, last time we were on a date together and she was acting hot and trying to approach me and hug me, but I was acting cool. Her, seeing my attitude she said: "Hmm, I can see things don't move forward", and she looked aloof. Then I approached her, and kissed her. Then she said: "Why did you do that?!", then she started crying (!!) and said: "I never wanted this to happen and I was avoiding this for months" (!!). Later on, we had some more kisses and foreplay, but she was saying: "I feel really embarrassed now (!), I can't evolve emotional with you, I still have my heart & mind thinking my ex". Then, I said her: "Ok then, no more seeing me again, I don't want to be friends with you, I WANT you", but then again she was saying - playing games with words. Any help please? I have feelings for her, she knows it, and looks like she has taken me for granted.
poodle Posted February 2, 2012 Posted February 2, 2012 This doesn't sound like reverse psychology to me. I think this girl has serious mental issues. Please accept that she's not into you. No girl who is would bring up feelings for their ex and start crying after you kiss her. Even if the two of you end up together, do you really think the relationship will be healthy if she's this unstable? Good luck.
Jynxx Posted February 2, 2012 Posted February 2, 2012 Later on, we had some more kisses and foreplay, but she was saying: "I feel really embarrassed now (!), I can't evolve emotional with you, I still have my heart & mind thinking my ex". Then, I said her: "Ok then, no more seeing me again, I don't want to be friends with you, I WANT you", but then again she was saying - playing games with words. Any help please? I have feelings for her, she knows it, and looks like she has taken me for granted. You're doing it wrong. You're using rational arguments against her emotional reasoning. The girl is confused. She doesn't know what she wants, it's up to you to make her like you. She's obviously attracted to you, otherwise she wouldn't have kissed you and had sex with you, so your job is to make her feel relaxed and forget about her ex and take it from there. Good luck.
Author Freddys Posted February 2, 2012 Author Posted February 2, 2012 @ poodle, She is visiting a psycho-therapist lately, to boost her mind balance. Not into me? May be the case, but this is happening for months. @ Jynxx, Yes, I do this wrong but already being into this for months (now & then) and tried various methods, I really don't know what else to try. As about rational arguments, I totally agree with you. She is always give me hints that she wants to take things slow, fun and with no pressure at all. Moreover, she said (with hints again) that she wants to know me much better, so she opens her heart. Next time she acts hot, should I lead her to sexual things and touches? Sure, it's up to me to make her like me, but I can see after so many months she is still naming her ex when things get hot . . and I suppose she needs much more time to recover. Good luck to me then :laugh:+
poodle Posted February 2, 2012 Posted February 2, 2012 (edited) She is visiting a psycho-therapist lately, to boost her mind balance. Not into me? May be the case, but this is happening for months.If this is going on for months, I'd be even more suspicious. Maybe she's scared of being alone and is using you to fill up that gap. Someone who really cares about you won't treat you that way. Why don't you try showing less interest in her and more in other girls to see how she'll react? There's a chance that if she realizes you won't be available forever, she'll know she has to get over her ex or she'll completely ruin her chances with you. Edited February 2, 2012 by poodle
Author Freddys Posted February 2, 2012 Author Posted February 2, 2012 If this is going on for months, I'd be even more suspicious. Maybe she's scared of being alone and is using you to fill up that gap. Someone who really cares about you won't treat you that way. Why don't you try showing less interest in her and more in other girls to see how she'll react to it? There's a chance that if she realizes you won't be available forever, she'll know she has to get over her ex or she'll completely ruin her chances with you. Yes, I gave her lot of attention then I started to "ignore" her and now she is confused with me . . . She is acting jealous when she (or he friends) see me with other girls. I "disappeared" for a while just to make her wonder and she was "dying" to know if there is another girl in my life. Truth is, she isn't ready at all to start a new relationship, hasn't recover from her ex (or she is just playing games) and she doesn't know me at the level she wants to open her heart. Well, this started months ago, but there were big gaps between us. For example, we haven't seen each other the last 2 months until the last date.
PrincessPeach Posted February 2, 2012 Posted February 2, 2012 It might be less reverse psychology and more the fact that she doesn't actually know herself what she wants. that's really the case with all girls and people. I may think I know what i want, but then when I get it, it turns out to not be what I thought it would be. Or maybe I get something different from what I want and I learn that I was wrong about what I wanted. We don't really know ourselves well enough to always know what we want from others or for ourselves. And other times we might subconsciously know what we want, but we say something else because it would make us feel bad about ourselves to tell the truth, so we lie to ourselves to feel better. Regardless it seems as though she might not have the emotional maturity or balance to be in a serious relationship. To me it sounds like the both of you are playing games more than you are interested in the development of your relationship. Games can be fun, but not if you are playing the same game forever. Games can be good to develop early attraction, but that trick isn't enough to maintain a healthy relationship. If you think you are just a placeholder for her ex, which it sounds like might be the case, then you should get out of there in my opinion.
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