soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 I am in counseling. The problem with me is that I very much don't want to mistrust women but every time I hear about a guy going through drama with a woman I just turn angry. When I read misandrist comments or when I hear them from any particular woman I just get angry. It sets off all types of defenses against the kind of crap I have been dealing with most of my life until recently. The other thing that gets me angry is how other men on this board are treated. I very much have a soft spot for any man in pain because I know what it feels like and when I see any man on here getting torn apart even though it is obviously coming from a place of pain I get angry. I hate seeing men go through the same things I did and I get very protective. So where exactly did you get the idea that the women on this board are here to serve as your own personal toilet, as convenient dumpsters for you to unload your anger on? Let's get down to basics.. you hate women, all women & feel that your pain entitles you to basically dump all over women here, when you're called out on your crap you begin your usual mewling, sniveling song and dance act till the women here end up comforting and reassuring you all over again & again. There are a lot of really nice women here who have been soaking up your rage for years, they don't deserve it & you really should knock it off!
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 For the record my wife never cheated on anybody. She is not a pure virgin but she always did things honestly. I would never marry a woman that cheated and before anybody jumps on me I have never cheated either so it is no double standard. If you read most articles that have to do with gender you will see a ton of misandrist comments and to be fair a ton of misogynistic comments. It's not that I am afraid of these women but when I hear how a lot of men have been blind sided by women they thought they could trust it makes me paranoid. When I was single and playing around between marriages I had none of these fears.
xxoo Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 "I got a peaceful easy feeling I know you won't let me down Cause I'm already standing on the ground" --Eagles You need a solid foundation, Woggle. No one here can give that to you. Your wife can't give it to you, either. It has to come from within.
soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 For the record my wife never cheated on anybody. She is not a pure virgin but she always did things honestly. I would never marry a woman that cheated and before anybody jumps on me I have never cheated either so it is no double standard. If you read most articles that have to do with gender you will see a ton of misandrist comments and to be fair a ton of misogynistic comments. It's not that I am afraid of these women but when I hear how a lot of men have been blind sided by women they thought they could trust it makes me paranoid. When I was single and playing around between marriages I had none of these fears. Do you ever read any articles or posts about women being blind sided by men they thought they could trust? The Infidelity forum here is full of such women,faithful wives, often with small children, who's lives have been ripped apart by a husband who can't keep his pecker in his pants. Yeah.. good men get hurt... so do good women
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 So where exactly did you get the idea that the women on this board are here to serve as your own personal toilet, as convenient dumpsters for you to unload your anger on? Let's get down to basics.. you hate women, all women & feel that your pain entitles you to basically dump all over women here, when you're called out on your crap you begin your usual mewling, sniveling song and dance act till the women here end up comforting and reassuring you all over again & again. There are a lot of really nice women here who have been soaking up your rage for years, they don't deserve it & you really should knock it off! I never insult any woman personally and I don't use women here as my toilet. I challenge you to find where I have personally insulted or used derogatory insults towards women like some of the other guys. I am just honest about what I feel.
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 Do you ever read any articles or posts about women being blind sided by men they thought they could trust? The Infidelity forum here is full of such women,faithful wives, often with small children, who's lives have been ripped apart by a husband who can't keep his pecker in his pants. Yeah.. good men get hurt... so do good women The difference is is that in the comments on those articles both men and women call those guys jerks but let a man get hurt and there is a bunch of you go girl kind of comments. I admit not so much on this board but just look at the Daily Mail or AOL and click on any gender related article.
soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 The difference is is that in the comments on those articles both men and women call those guys jerks but let a man get hurt and there is a bunch of you go girl kind of comments. I admit not so much on this board but just look at the Daily Mail or AOL and click on any gender related article. See here you go again.. I suggest that you focus on faithful wives who've been betrayed & you turn it into a "yes but" situation. I give up Woggle, we're all lying cheating whores, we pretend to love you all the while planning on which of your friends we're going to sleep with first.We all love it when one of our girlfriends cheats on her husband, heck we'll help her & lie to cover for her. There, I've verified your truth for you, happy now?
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 See here you go again.. I suggest that you focus on faithful wives who've been betrayed & you turn it into a "yes but" situation. I give up Woggle, we're all lying cheating whores, we pretend to love you all the while planning on which of your friends we're going to sleep with first.We all love it when one of our girlfriends cheats on her husband, heck we'll help her & lie to cover for her. There, I've verified your truth for you, happy now? I never said that. The internet attracts all kinds of jerks anyway. Being betrayed sucks no matter what gender you are but for some reason these articles just attracted the worst kind of comments. It's like any article involving a black person attracting a bunch of racists.
soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 I never said that. The internet attracts all kinds of jerks anyway. Being betrayed sucks no matter what gender you are but for some reason these articles just attracted the worst kind of comments. It's like any article involving a black person attracting a bunch of racists. No, that is exactly what you are saying, you come here, post those articles as proof that all women hate men & challenge us to prove you wrong, again & again and again! You mention those websites so often I'm beginning to think you're being paid to shill for them! I also imagine you sitting in your den, pants down around your ankles, playing with yourself as you begin to read these so called "man hater" threads .. I almost picture you muttering "I'll show those evil biatches!" as you bring your member to fully erect status, then you click over here & drop your load both literally & figuratively on a lot of women here who've been nothing but nice to you. This stuff has become a fetish for you & you're using a lot of nice people here who've spent a great deal of time trying to be supportive of you. Just stop it please!
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 No, that is exactly what you are saying, you come here, post those articles as proof that all women hate men & challenge us to prove you wrong, again & again and again! You mention those websites so often I'm beginning to think you're being paid to shill for them! I also imagine you sitting in your den, pants down around your ankles, playing with yourself as you begin to read these so called "man hater" threads .. I almost picture you muttering "I'll show those evil biatches!" as you bring your member to fully erect status, then you click over here & drop your load both literally & figuratively on a lot of women here who've been nothing but nice to you. This stuff has become a fetish for you & you're using a lot of nice people here who've spent a great deal of time trying to be supportive of you. Just stop it please! That is not what it is at all. Honestly most of the time it is to be reassured that not all women think that way. I admit the way I do it is not right though. Nothing I do is intended to use or abuse anybody.
soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 That is not what it is at all. Honestly most of the time it is to be reassured that not all women think that way. I admit the way I do it is not right though. Nothing I do is intended to use or abuse anybody. Then why not sit here and directly say "I'm having a bad day & could really use some support" ? See, unlike the others gals here, I'm not a nice woman, not nice at all & have no problem telling you that this black hole of emotional neediness you keep erecting here isn't helping you & it's tying up the time of all the nice people who've tried to support & counsel you. Just stop it!
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 Maybe I should say that but when I am mad I do not think clearly.
soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 Maybe I should say that but when I am mad I do not think clearly. Ok and then you come here and basically abuse the kindness of the many people here that support you? Sorry but that's not okay, you get mad over comments you read in another forum? then unleash your rage there & stop using people here as dumpsters for your anger. Nobody here is responsible for your inability to tolerate your own affect.
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 Ok and then you come here and basically abuse the kindness of the many people here that support you? Sorry but that's not okay, you get mad over comments you read in another forum? then unleash your rage there & stop using people here as dumpsters for your anger. That is not my intention which is why I never insult anybody personally.
soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 That is not my intention which is why I never insult anybody personally. and that's yet another line of BS that you drag out when confronted about this never ending loop. If comments posted by women on other forums offend you, then speak up at those other forums, direct your anger at those who've earned it. From now on when you post your "proof" that women hate men, I'm going to simply agree with you as it's pretty clear that nothing anybody says to you here makes a single bit of difference.
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 and that's yet another line of BS that you drag out when confronted about this never ending loop. If comments posted by women on other forums offend you, then speak up at those other forums, direct your anger at those who've earned it. From now on when you post your "proof" that women hate men, I'm going to simply agree with you as it's pretty clear that nothing anybody says to you here makes a single bit of difference. Find an example where I insulted somebody personally without them insulting me first.
soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 Find an example where I insulted somebody personally without them insulting me first. Don't be obtuse, it doesn't become you & it implies that I'm stupid. You post versions of the same thread over & over about the "gender wars" you constantly question if any woman is truly happy in her marriage, when tons of women offer up positive postings & attempt to support you they are then discounted or hit with a "yes but.." statement from you. In a nutshell only you can decide how you feel about marriage & relationships, only you can have a direct impact on the success or failure of your own marriage. Do you believe that all women, including your own wife secretly long to be free & hate their husbands? If you believe this, then divorce your wife, set her free & remain single, take up the player lifestyle where you can use & toss aside women to express your rage against your mother. Alternatively, you can decide that your own life experiences are altering your perceptions & negatively coloring your judgements. Are you tired of this endless loop of misery that is poisoning your mind, placing your relationship both online and off into jeopardy? If you are you need to talk about what you are doing here with your therapist, perhaps give up this forum for a lengthy period to see if then you can see some real healing. Personally I think being here is hurting you a lot more than it's helping you & is very possibly putting your therapy into a stall where you aren't progressing forward. Decide.. just decide.
whichwayisup Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 Has you therapist thought about (or have you asked) going on meds? This pattern, this habit.. Looking online, reading stories and situations which set you off IS addictive. The cycle has to stop. It's one thing to feel pain and mistrust from your past - What you suffered and went through is something nobody should go through in life.. But, you're not making this any easier on yourself by purposely looking for (and asking for) trouble. Someone mentioned you should go on meds, so think about it. Your mind is obsessed, you look for articles that feed your anxiety, feed your anger and you yourself have said that when you and your wife were away for 3 weeks, you felt great!! Then came home and poof! Back to reality (sorry but the internet is NOT reality, some people exaggerate, some people lie, some troll, so don't base your beliefs on what you read online) and you felt bad. Instead of reliving the great memories of your wonderful holiday with your wife, staying happy and feeling good - You chose to dive right into your 'comfortable habit' of looking for things that get you going. This is why meds can help control your thought process and reaction. Even you out so that anger and anxiety doesn't affect you like it does now. Thoughts??? Please, let me know what you think Woggle.
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 I really do not want to go on meds. I never even take aspirin unless a headache is really bad. I will stop looking at gender war crap and see how things go. When I am on vacation with my wife I never have freakouts.
soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 I really do not want to go on meds. I never even take aspirin unless a headache is really bad. I will stop looking at gender war crap and see how things go. When I am on vacation with my wife I never have freakouts. Question for you, what makes you feel entitled to dumping your "freakouts" on people here? Are we like your emotional cum dumpsters Woggle? Why not dump your freakout's on your therapist,after all you're paying him/her, not us.
whichwayisup Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 I really do not want to go on meds. I never even take aspirin unless a headache is really bad. I will stop looking at gender war crap and see how things go. When I am on vacation with my wife I never have freakouts. Completely understand with the meds, I'm with ya there.. BUT .. During my worst time suffering from anxiety and panic attacks, my T told me she wouldn't push any meds on me UNLESS she felt it was really necessary. The reason why I didn't go on meds, sorry, didn't have to is because I did CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy) and I think you need to talk to your T about CBT. It's one thing to talk about your issues in therapy, try to resolve them etc, it's another to retrain your brain and habits into a more positive way of thinking and reacting. Woggle you need to be PRO ACTIVE into your changes..You truly have to want to rid of this habit.. Promise me ONE Thing for now.. STOP going on "other" forums. Quit those and just stick to LS. Delete your account(s) if you're allowed to. You have support on LS, you don't on other boards, so quit them!! They harm you. This is a first of many things I'm slowly going to ask you to do so you can slowly get out of the habit of going on those types of boards. Date nights with your wife. MORE than once a week. Get off the computer and spend time with her. Go for walks, shoot some pool, join a gym and work out together, swim or something .. or do yoga classes, dancing classes! GO places where you'll see other couples doing FUN and LOVING things together! Feed off of that. Hope this helps.
whichwayisup Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 Question for you, what makes you feel entitled to dumping your "freakouts" on people here? Are we like your emotional cum dumpsters Woggle? Why not dump your freakout's on your therapist,after all you're paying him/her, not us. The thing is, I really don't believe Wogs is 'freaking out" on people here. Sure, he IS freaking out but he isn't being pissy or calling people names. He goes through these cycles and most of us who know him see this pattern and know what to say and how to help him diffuse his own bomb. Reassurance, positive words..
soserious1 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 The thing is, I really don't believe Wogs is 'freaking out" on people here. Sure, he IS freaking out but he isn't being pissy or calling people names. He goes through these cycles and most of us who know him see this pattern and know what to say and how to help him diffuse his own bomb. Reassurance, positive words.. and that's the job of the therapist that he pays, why is our job to "diffuse his own bomb" Seriously, I actually like Woggle but am coming to strongly believe these threads of his are actually impeding the work his therapist is undoubtedly trying to do with him. We're all helping him to stay sick, not a good thing.
Author Woggle Posted January 29, 2012 Author Posted January 29, 2012 I will stay off those other boards. When I think about it they seem to attract idiots no matter what the topic is.
whichwayisup Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 and that's the job of the therapist that he pays, why is our job to "diffuse his own bomb" Seriously, I actually like Woggle but am coming to strongly believe these threads of his are actually impeding the work his therapist is undoubtedly trying to do with him. We're all helping him to stay sick, not a good thing. Why is our job? Because this is a 'help' forum and as a member (atleast this is how I feel) it IS part of my job to help someone, try to reach them and try my best to make a difference in their life that will ease some of their pain and strife.
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