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i met this guy at a party...where do i go from here?


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Posted

last week i met this guy at a friends party and i really was attracted to him, and he had a great personality. i really want to get to know him more. unfortunately my friend was tired and i went home with her, but i never got to say goodbye to this guy. we spent a lot of the night talking but he had a lot of friends at the party so he was busy when i left. there are certain things that happened that night - certain looks and things he said - that make me wonder if he is into me. i just cant tell. the next day some of his friends added me on fb (but not him) and i thought of adding him to start messaging him but i didnt and now i feel its too late. the same friend is having a party next week. i guess i will wait until then to make a move? but what do i do to show him i like him? how should i flirt to let him know? and should i ask him to exchange numbers? or wait for him to do it?

 

im kinda new to the dating scene after being in a LDR for a while, and then after a long break up and single-dom i finally met someone i had an instant spark with - i just dont know if he feels the same. im also pretty shy...

 

thanks for the help LS!

Posted

You will never know if you don't try...

 

And -- seriously -- what have you got to lose by reaching to him?

Posted

It sounds positive. Go to the party. Smile at him, say hi, ask how his week was, acknowledge that some of his friends 'friended' you on FB and say you wanted to know if he'd be your FB friend (I say this so as he knows that you're not interested in his friends, but in him), and just have fun! I think things will evolve naturally and he'll probably make a move and ask you out.

  • Author
Posted

update...he wasnt at the party and im not sure when im gonna see him again! i really want to get to know but i dont have his number! where should i go from here?

Posted

Send him a FB friend req or msg saying "hey! was hoping to see you at XYZ party, how have you been?" or some such thing.

  • Author
Posted

i sent him a friend request a few days ago but he still hasnt responded! (but he also has not been on it for a week)

Posted
i sent him a friend request a few days ago but he still hasnt responded! (but he also has not been on it for a week)

 

I'm curious as to how you would know if someone has been on Facebook a week or not? If you're not friends with them, that status should not be on public view.

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Posted

i guess not everyone has supreme privacy settings. and also my friend who is friends with him said he hasnt been on.

 

i am really frustrated that he doesnt use his fb because i really want to see him! but without his number i have no way of contacting him and our mutual friend hasnt had a party in a while so i havent seen him for 3 weeks now :(

 

i guess there isnt anything i can do?

Posted

The signs for this one aren't great. Normally if a guy likes a girl and the girl tries to add him to facebook the guy will instantly accept. You could send him a message if you felt like it, but I would say just move on. I'd probably do one or the other of these things fyi. You would personally be better served directing your guy-dar at another guy.

Posted
Normally if a guy likes a girl and the girl tries to add him to facebook the guy will instantly accept.

The OP said he hasn't checked his facebook account. Since she friended his friends, she should try to contact him through them.

  • Author
Posted

no his friends friended me!

and i know its weird he hasnt accepted me on fb since when we met it seemed like we clicked...

Posted

Am I the only one who thinks FB request by someone you hardly know creepy? I even get creeped out when guys do it, let alone girls.

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author
Posted
Am I the only one who thinks FB request by someone you hardly know creepy? I even get creeped out when guys do it, let alone girls.

 

i honestly dont think its creepy - but maybe it is a generational thing.

 

i still havent seen him but i cant stop thinking about him! i think creepy would be asking his friend for his number...

Posted
i honestly dont think its creepy - but maybe it is a generational thing.

 

i still havent seen him but i cant stop thinking about him! i think creepy would be asking his friend for his number...

What generational thing? Im not some 40 year old grandpa.

 

Looking up someone you barely know on the internet and adding him as a friend is rather stalker-ish.

 

Ask for his number or tell him that you are going to look him up on FB in person.

  • Author
Posted
What generational thing? Im not some 40 year old grandpa.

 

i personally dont know any 40 year old grandpas... :p

 

but thanks for the advice, always good to get another perspective

 

and i would ask him in person if our paths ever crossed...

Posted

Many women on this forum and elsewhere have stated they'd be creeped out if a guy asked for their phone number via FB. Why should guys think differently?

Posted

If you are friends with anyone who is also friends with him and they see him OFTEN, ask them point blank to ask him if he was interested in you. Most guys will respond positively to a girl being forward like that.

  • Author
Posted

well today he accepted my friend request!

 

not sure if i should message him asking him if he wants to hang out. or be less forward and give him my number or something

 

thoughts??

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