kaylan Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 (edited) ^WOW! What self respecting man collects alimony off of his ex. What self respecting person in general does that? Even if I was a woman I would not want my ex taking care of me after a split. Funny thing is guys like your ex think those women are actually only with him. If shes the kind of woman to date a much older guy who mooches off his ex wife, I wouldnt think of her to be super into him. Unless he wants to delude himself that she isnt checking out guys here age anymore. Edited January 21, 2012 by kaylan
Anela Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 I married an age peer, a man 3 yrs my senior. We are divorced now, after supporting him during the marriage I now pay him $2,750 per month in alimony plus add on's. He's living with a woman 22 years younger than I am, he tells me that the secret to is that when he gets ready to have sex, all he needs to do is to think of the fact that he's getting to use my money to support this luscious babe & he gets rock hard and has a stamina that blows his lover away. Oh well, at least 2 people are gloriously happy with this older man, younger woman pairing. What a piece of, well, you know...
PinkInTheLimo Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 I only judge my sister's fiance based on how he treated my sister, and myself. He caused huge arguments in my family, made me very uncomfortable, and tried to make me the other woman - other than when he declared his undying love for me, telling my mother that he had always been in love with me, not my sister (he's the only man she's ever loved, and slept with). I could have hurt him, badly. Anela, did you tell your sister this? A man who tries to seduce the sister of his fiancee, that's very bad news. Same thing happened to me, the husband of my sister came on to me when they were engaged (He's her age though) and no hair on my head would think about crossing a line with my sister's fiancee, and he was totally not my type. They are married now and I would not be surprised if he cheats on her.
Anela Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 Anela, did you tell your sister this? A man who tries to seduce the sister of his fiancee, that's very bad news. Same thing happened to me, the husband of my sister came on to me when they were engaged (He's her age though) and no hair on my head would think about crossing a line with my sister's fiancee, and he was totally not my type. They are married now and I would not be surprised if he cheats on her. I did, and they seem to have worked through it all, but I haven't seen him in person since December 2004. He lives in Canada. She claims that he has more grace than I do (she wanted him here for Christmas, and I couldn't take the thought of being under the same roof as him for ten days to at least a month) and that started a huge row. I'm supposed to get over it, for her sake, and I don't see how I'm going to; he caused so much trouble. I can handle saying hello over skype (just quickly) when she's on there, but don't want him in my personal space. They're getting married this Spring (put off from late last year, when it seemed like we were surrounded by death).
aj22one Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 I'd date Shakira Caine or Iman if they were single (and I was single). Even at or approaching 60, both of them are still hot.
musemaj11 Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 Money or even more money. You are never going to hear about a 25 year old woman marrying a 60 year old man who has less wealth than she does. NEVER.
Woggle Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 I don't, if they're happy. I was making an omelet, and thinking about any older women/younger men pairings that I could think of. That's one thing I like about you, Woggle: you didn't discount an older woman, but going by a lot of men, you'd think there was something wrong with that (but not older men/younger women). It's just another double standard, most of the time. I wonder how many men are all for the older man/younger woman pairing, would go for an older woman; how much older, and for a fling or a real relationship? I only judge my sister's fiance based on how he treated my sister, and myself. He caused huge arguments in my family, made me very uncomfortable, and tried to make me the other woman - other than when he declared his undying love for me, telling my mother that he had always been in love with me, not my sister (he's the only man she's ever loved, and slept with). I could have hurt him, badly. These things would be just as bad with any age pairing. My current boss is married to a woman ten years younger and they are one of the happiest couples I know. With the exception of extreme age differences like 20 and 80 age is just a number.
joystickd Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 Heck if I know SugarKane. While men in their 60s have the possibility to still have children, by 60, a man's sperms is pretty damaged. Men start a decline in fertility in their 30s. I don't think our society talks enough about male fertility issues and health. A month ago I was grocery shopping and this nice older man (had to be in his 60s) was chatting me up. I had seen him in there before. And I was thinking "awww he's sweet, he's like my grandpa". Next thing I know he's asking me if I have a boyfriend and I was so stunned I had to pause for a minute and just said that I did infact have a boyfriend even though I don't. He was all like "well that's too bad." Like I was going to actually go out on a date with someone his age! Sheesh. She felt that way because he asked her to do something he had seen on porn.
Yamaha Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 The divorce rate is over 50%. I don't know the percentage of LTR/marriages of partners with huge age differences but I'd say its pretty small. I doubt if age is the underlying problem in most relationships. If people find someone they love and are happy with, who are we to say it's wrong?
Disenchantedly Yours Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 She felt that way because he asked her to do something he had seen on porn. Lol. I think you secretly heart you some DY.
FitChick Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 Joan Collins of Dynasty fame is more than thirty years older than her husband and they are happily married. She acts younger than her age and he acts older so that narrows the age gap. I think that is probably one reason why these marriages work for some people. I personally find the whole cougar trend refreshing because it shows that older women can be sexy and attract younger men. In the past, women over 50 were seen as frumpy grannies because, frankly, that's how they looked and acted. My how things have changed! Personally, I can't wait for the day when people won't care one way or the other about age gap relationships because it will be so common, like interracial dating.
musemaj11 Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 Except a few anomalies, men arent going to stop judging a woman by her youth and beauty just like women arent going to stop judging a man by his wealth and status.
Scottdmw Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 I wouldn't even try with you, because you're nine years younger than me. It feels weird to me. I've had college students hit on me, too. Although I know a a 37 year old woman whose fiance is in his early twenties, and they now have a beautiful baby. I'm nice to them, but when I clearly see on a site, that they're ignoring women their own age, it angers me. I can understand how it can be a little difficult to see this as a women. I can see how it would seem unfair. But, men are generally attracted to younger women. Not always, but generally. It's a fact of nature. Getting angry about it isn't going to do anything. Lots of times, men complain that they are "nice" and think that entitles them to women being attracted to them. How would you feel if a man said, "It angers me when women ignore nice men?" Or whatever. Telling men that they have to pay attention to women their own age because it fits your view of the world is a waste of time. There is no law of morality that says men have to do this. They don't. It's just an idea that some people have and others don't. Trying to put guilt on them or something isn't going to do anything useful. Even if men WANTED to choose to conform to this idea, they can't. Who you are attracted to is not a decision. Ask yourself if you could choose to be attracted to someone you are not. If you can't, why ask men to be?
joystickd Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 Lol. I think you secretly heart you some DY. I do I want you so bad my d**k is hard lol.
123321 Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 When these old guys end up marrying younger women, they buy into the parenting job, in order to please their younger wives who want children, although the men don't have the energy to raise them, and may not even live to see those kids to adulthood. People die or get divorced or otherwise screw up their parenting responsibilities all the time. It's not he sole providence of the older partner. I'm nice to them, but when I clearly see on a site, that they're ignoring women their own age, it angers me. Why? What business of yours is it? By the way, I won't date over 30 as a general rule myself. The .... Dos Equis commercial arent portraying the guy as a sex symbol, hes being portrayed as a dude who always lived life to the fullest and is extraordinary. Very true. ^WOW! What self respecting man collects alimony off of his ex. What self respecting person in general does that? Many women and a few men, that's who. I can understand how it can be a little difficult to see this as a women. I can see how it would seem unfair. But, men are generally attracted to younger women. Not always, but generally. It's a fact of nature. Getting angry about it isn't going to do anything. Lots of times, men complain that they are "nice" and think that entitles them to women being attracted to them. How would you feel if a man said, "It angers me when women ignore nice men?" Or whatever. "Ladies, you should try to marry someone who earns and who probably always will earn significantly less than you do."
kaylan Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 (edited) Except a few anomalies, men arent going to stop judging a woman by her youth and beauty just like women arent going to stop judging a man by his wealth and status. Dudes need to stop pretending women arent attracted to young fit men...because they are. Men AND women are attracted to youth. Thats whats touted as most attractive if you just look around you. The only reason some women chase well to do guys is not sexual attraction, but for a comfortable life. If more women had status and money, you can bet ya there would be more mooching Kevin Federline types out there trying to get them.</p> Something a lot of people dont realize is that when older men chase young girls, its more about proving to other men that they are still attractive and have status. Some are running away from their own age, want to feel youthful again, and tell themselves theyve still "got it". You cant use evo-psych mumbo jumbo to back up why men like young gals, and then pretend it doesnt work the same way for women. If we want to use unproven evo-psych explanations, then we could easily say women are now all chasing young fit guys because they show more raw masculinity and youthful healthy power.</p> Theres a difference between choosing a mate for raw sexual attraction and choosing a mater for a comfy life. A lot of men choose a good wife over the hot girl all time time, just like women choose a secure man over the hot boy. Doesnt mean they dont find young and hot attractive. In a world that was built upon men having wealthy and security, of course some women are gonna chase those guys so they can have an easier life. Like I said before, if more women have status and things were evened out in history in terms of who holds finances, youd see more mooching K-feds shacking up with girls simply for security. </p> People seem to easily forget that evo-psych is not even accepted by most scientists and anthropologists. I think older guys want to believe that women who date them for security do it because of sexual attraction and that they can compete with younger more in shape guys. In terms of sheer sexual attraction women will be more attracted to a dude whos body excuses health and masculinity. Just because shes with a guy for security doesnt negate her attraction to physically appealing men. Edited January 22, 2012 by kaylan
123321 Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 Dudes need to stop pretending women arent attracted to young fit men.. People decide what they want to do in a deep part of the brain and then come up for the reasons after. The old "he's a good provider" was a reason from a simpler and probably more honest time but it's not cool any more. Here is an interesting experiment that I read about. Researchers took a bunch of men and put their photos on a sheet of paper, a head shot and a full length shot, with nothing else in the blank space. They then asked a bunch of randomly selected women (for each guy) "how hot is this guy?" Not "how much would you like to date him" or "how desirable is he", just straight up how good looking is he physically. Simple right? Then they reprinted the papers with a short bit of information added to the previously empty space. Age, income, education, occupation, height, and so on. . They then asked a bunch of randomly selected women (for each guy) "how hot is this guy?" There was almost no correlation between the second set of responses and the first. There was strong correlation between income, occupation, and a few other items, and how "good looking" the guy was, however.
kaylan Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 My above reply should say *exudes masculinity, not exuses masculinity.In response to the poster above me....instead of giving anecdotes of a study...please cite this study and share it with us.Also, none of what you stated cancels out the fact that most young women chase after young men. If status was what made someone most sexually appealing to someone, then this wouldnt be so. Wed have the cream of the crop women all dating older(7 years plus) men who were more well off then men their age.Its no secret that youth is universally valued and attractive in both sexes. Thats just the way things work
123321 Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 ...instead of giving anecdotes of a study...please cite this study It's from 2009, in the UK I believe, and I'm not gonna dig for it. I don't make the weather I just report it, if you don't like it complain to whoever or whatever makes us the way we are.
123321 Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 Another experiment was done in speed dating sessions, with the participants unaware they were being studied at the time. In the scenario studied, people would sit and have a little time, I forget exactly but just a few minutes, to evaluate someone before they had to move on. Most of the men knew if they wanted a date before they sat down fully, whereas women took much longer to decide. I found that interesting as well. As a guy, i know if I'm interested in a few seconds. I've never been a woman so i can't confirm the second half of this.
kaylan Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 It's from 2009, in the UK I believe, and I'm not gonna dig for it. I don't make the weather I just report it, if you don't like it complain to whoever or whatever makes us the way we are. lmao...typical response from someone who refuses to back up their points...thats like writing a term paper without a bibliography.I dont care what the stats say, I am simply saying your interpretation doesnt negate anything I have said.</p></p> Status makes men and women more attractive. Its like a trophy factor. The more rare something seems to be, and the more hard it is to attain, then the more perceived value it will have. Guys fawn over plenty of celebrities that they would call plain janes if they werent famous in some way. Stars talk about this themselves all the time...how men and women ignored them and as soon as they blew up, everyone was after them.</p> How else would women like lucy liu be considered one of the worlds hottest women back in her hey day? Shes not even the sexiest asian gal out there =P</p>
123321 Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 I dont care what the stats say, I am simply saying your interpretation doesnt negate anything I have said. There was almost no correlation between the two sets of responses. Do you understand what that is saying?
kaylan Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 There was almost no correlation between the two sets of responses. Do you understand what that is saying?My bad broski. I misread what you typed.
123321 Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 I found it fascinating. The women were asked a lot of questions after they evaluated the guys, and they often said they wouldn't date a guy because of his money. They said looks were very important. Then it turns out that the guys who were perceived to be richer or have better jobs (there was a correlation to prestigious work too) were perceived to be better looking through some sort of wetware magic. I was all, "what?" Hard to believe. I always thought it was a sort of bonus, a little adder or subtractor, or maybe just add a little. No. In fact guys who were rated 8-9 (1-10) but who were given low incomes and ****ty jobs lost 5-6 points and became 3s and 4s. Guys who were 4-5 and who were given a big income or hot career, ($400K software entrepreneur or MD) jumped a similar amount. I was honestly a little shocked.
kaylan Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 Btw, your username reminds me of an episode from the old sitcom Family Matters. Carl was trying some things for anger management since Urkel was always getting on his nerves. So hed say 'three two one, one two three, what the heck, is bothering me'...he sayd this to cool off but it didnt work. Steve Urkel was a pain in the butt lol.
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