123321 Posted January 29, 2012 Posted January 29, 2012 The poster said she's 26 and is asking about men 15-20 years older, so that 41 not 42, reading fail for me. I would call 26 middle 20s not late 20s but whatever. Now getting back on track, the statements I took issue with are these. Usually the problem with dating older is that eventually things can not work out .... Which turns out to not be the case so much, and ... Um...actually the average age gap in relationships is 3 years in the US. A simple google of stats will show you the averages for different countries. Lets not pretend older guys trolling for young gals is about what women want. When you were arguing over the finer points of 3 vs. 5 year age gaps. For the men in question (41+) the gap is actually more than 5 years and it grows as the potential for gap increases. In other words, as to possibility of a gap increases the actual gap also increases. Hmmm.
kaylan Posted January 30, 2012 Posted January 30, 2012 (edited) The poster said she's 26 and is asking about men 15-20 years older, so that 41 not 42, reading fail for me. I would call 26 middle 20s not late 20s but whatever. And she got several answers from posters on the subject.Which turns out to not be the case so much, and ...Incorrect. Most people will tell you exactly why their age disparity relationships havent worked. There are reasons behind it. Its not simply because an age difference exists, but what differences and dynamics such a difference brings about. They work out less than people who date those nearer their age. If youd like to go over those exact studies that go over relationship success based on age gap...feel free to PM me. The study you provided cannot and does not make assertions on marriage success based on age gap, if not only because the larger age gap marriages make a smaller proportion of marriages studied. The study simply said that age gaps alone dont do anything to divorce rates, but they also said they didnt control for anything else. All that means is that age gap on its own merits doesnt cause problems. But that is not what I and other posters have said. We have stated that issues that increase break ups and divorce are more prevalent when there is a larger age gap. You could only assume this is why people under 40 mostly marry close to their own age. The younger one is, the more they have in common with people their own age. As people grow older they are usually able to relate to a larger age spread, rather than mostly people close to their own age. However, the study doesnt control for this...nor does it contain a sizeable proportion of larger age gap marriages. Its also doesnt study relationships in general...only marriages...so it would miss tons of failed partnerships that go down the tubes for whatever reason. When you were arguing over the finer points of 3 vs. 5 year age gaps. For the men in question (41+) the gap is actually more than 5 years and it grows as the potential for gap increases. In other words, as to possibility of a gap increases the actual gap also increases. Hmmm. The study showed that for SOME men aged 41 plus, there was more than 5 years gap. And we already established that this age group makes a small proportion of those getting married so it doesnt disprove my original claims. So half of a small percentage of those getting married are marrying with more than 5 years age difference...um ok? I was arguing 3 vs 5 because any numbers I saw show people date within their age group...averaging 3 years difference. Your study showed no different than what I said. Most dating people do date within their age group...the study showed the majority of the under 40 crowd never reached a 5 year or plus gap. It did show that more 40 plus year olds reach that gap but not all. But since those under 40 year olds make up 80 percent of those marrying according to your study...my claim stands. Also, if you really want to argue this, itd be better to provide a study that gives info about how many marriages were actually studied. I found that bothersome myself, that they didnt tell us how many people we studied in their research. So even though your study supports my claims more so than yours, Im not gonna put much stock in that. As I said, PM me if you wish to continue this...I have a couple of studies you should see. Edited January 30, 2012 by kaylan
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