PoppyLove89 Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 (edited) I haven't contacted my ex in over two months... I deleted him off Facebook and so that should have been enough distance for him if he wants nothing to do with me. But he has literally just blocked me, like within the past hour...what is the point? I can't see what he's up to anyway? And I haven't contacted him. Why????? My heart is racing!!! Edited January 18, 2012 by PoppyLove89
Exit Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 Why does it matter? And how would you know he had blocked you unless you tried to type in his name or URL and saw that nothing came up? I know the pain of being blocked too but there isn't much you can do about it. You're probably better off anyway, despite having deleted him you could still punch him in just to see his default picture and whatever information he has market as public. It hurt me when I got blocked too but it has freed me from the torture of temptation to look. Why does "why" matter? Maybe he thought you were still looking. Maybe it was his retaliation for deleting him in the first place.
flow15 Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 Perhaps he has deleted his account and not actually blocked you?? OR maybe his account is down at the moment?? What does it matter if you werent even friends on fb?
Author PoppyLove89 Posted January 18, 2012 Author Posted January 18, 2012 No he's definitely blocked me, my friend still has him. It's just like a final punch in the stomach. Why couldn't he just have left it as it was? I feel like there's something behind it as it seems odd to just randomly block someone after two and a half months. Maybe he's started seeing someone else? But I'd still find out since we have mutual friends who'd tell me. I just don't get it. It's the finality of it all. Like he's not even open to ever being friends! Only the other day his mum was telling me how he was reading my letter to him that I gave him a couple days after we split in November. It makes no sense; it only happened an hour ago as it flashed up that he'd accepted his mum's friend request and now he's blocked me?
BoredAgain Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 Slow down. Take a deep breath. Relax. You have absolutely no idea why he blocked you. Like others said, maybe it's retaliation for you deleting him. Maybe he started dating a new jealous girlfriend. Maybe he clicked the "block" button by mistake. There's no way for you to know, but more importantly IT DOESN'T MATTER. You shouldn't really be checking his profile in the first place, so think of it as a blessing in disguise. Don't concern yourself with what he's doing or thinking. You need to focus on yourself.
Exit Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 You're allowing yourself to be trapped in a situation to still be tortured by these little bits of information. Why is his mom telling you that he's reading letters from you and why would your mutual friends bug you with information about who he is dating? Remaining in touch with ex's family members and stuff like that is certainly no way to heal. Let's consider the worst case scenario, he's started seeing someone else and that motivated him to block you. So what? I mean don't get me wrong I understand exactly what you're saying that this feels like the final blow to the stomach, but maybe that's what you need at this point. It seems obvious that you're living in a state of hope thinking that something good is still going to happen, you felt good knowing that he read a letter from you a couple weeks ago, you felt good that despite not being friends on FB at least he hadn't blocked you, well now he has and it's damaging to the hope you've been holding on to. But false hope is pointless anyway. I'm sorry you are hurting and none of us know why he would do this after 2 months of leaving it alone, but it's just a reminder that staying in touch with his family or somewhat paying attention to what he does on Facebook is just going to keep hurting you. What if he didn't block you and some day you come across a new default picture of him with his arm around someone else? Would that feel any better?
flow15 Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 I have my previous ex's blocked on fb because I just feel weird that they can see my picture. I know that the whole world can see it, but I don't like the fact that they can. I don't want them to know whats going on in my life, so I have them blocked.. When I was with my most recent ex I had pictures of the two of us together, and it didn't feel right that they could see that either.
Author PoppyLove89 Posted January 18, 2012 Author Posted January 18, 2012 I just don't understand it. I've literally kept myself to myself. I haven't contacted him since the last time we spoke in November; we saw each other over Xmas by accident on nights out but that's been it! Literally, I saw him on his sister's profile one minute (i've been friends with his sisters already/anyway) and then within the hour, I'd been blocked. I haven't done anything! And it's almost like breaking up all over again; he's literally shut me out of his life. I DON'T EXIST! I'm in tears and I've been trying so hard to be strong. I can't understand why he's let things get so bitter.
flow15 Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 Calm down.. FB is stupid anyway!! and like others have said, maybe he clicked on it by accident... or maybe he has a freakso gf who did it for him! You'll never know, but at the end of the day you weren't even friends on it, so nothings rly changed!
Author PoppyLove89 Posted January 18, 2012 Author Posted January 18, 2012 I could understand if I was constantly contacting him and he just thought I was harassing him lol but I haven't spoken a word to him! Even if he has a new girlfriend he knows I'd find out, I'm friends with his sisters anyway so they'd tell me. I thought my heart was going to explode, it's never beat so fast! I can't believe it!! I know it's only a website but it's the fact that he's gone out of his way to do it; unless he just wants a reaction, there's most definitely a reason behind it! God, I never thought it would come to this.
Kamila Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 What if he didn't block you and some day you come across a new default picture of him with his arm around someone else? Would that feel any better? That would be the final blow. Be lucky you haven't stumbled upon photos that would put you more down than you're feeling right now. Believe me, there is a thing worse than to be blocked, and that is to be replaced by someone else and for the whole FB community to see it and you in particular. If he has blocked you, then don't worry about it. Don't let a little 'blocked' status put you down. Maybe he's hurt and he needs to lick his wounds in the dark...
BoredAgain Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 PoppyLove89 -- You don't seem to be taking in anything that we are saying. So let me ask you again, why does it matter that he blocked you? You're hurt, I get it, but his life is not your concern anymore. As Exit said, you're just torturing yourself with all these little tidbits about his life. Instead of focusing on yourself, you're focusing on him. If you want to stop hurting then you need to change this.
Lis007 Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 Maybe he blocked you to stop himself looking at your profile? Try not to read too much into it... easier said than done I know.
spicolli Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 Maybe he blocked you to: Get a rise out of you? Stop himself from checking your profile? Appease a new significant other? Get back at you? Get you to contact him? Whatever the reason, it may be confusing, suck, hurt etc. But im not going to say it doesn't matter, bc it does. Unfortunately you wouldn't even know about this if you weren't digging. The only way to keep from getting burned is to stay out of the fire. It clearly affected you in a negative manner, which obviously matters, but its a blessing. You now have zero control over the situation. You don't have to worry about seeing his pics, info, checking it frantically, none of it. I asked to be blocked when I found out she was banging her ex (now bf) and it helped so much that I haven't even checked to see if I was blocked in months, and I couldn't care less to contact her. try not to let it rattle you too much. Its just facebook, its not real life, and it truly means NOTHING. Keep up the NC and forget this chump.
perfectlyflawed459 Posted January 18, 2012 Posted January 18, 2012 Please take a deep breath and cool off a bit. I know when stuff like this, it is easy to assume the worse, but that is all it really is, an ASSUMPTION. Like everyone says, you do not know the real intentions behind his actions or if he even meant to do it in the first place. It could be anything really, but no matter how long we sit here and try to analyze why your ex blocked you, we will still be running around in circles and have no definiative answer for you. Only he really knows the motive behind his actions. Right now, you still need to focus on you and your healing. Let go of what happened and continue to move forward with your life. You are doing a great job at staying NC, do not let one little facebook move ruin your progression! Think of it like this, he is doing you a favor. You will no longer have to see him through social media and you abolish any risk of seeing a post or photo from him that could set you back.
Author PoppyLove89 Posted January 20, 2012 Author Posted January 20, 2012 Thank you to all of you for jumping to calm me down...proves that we're all here to support each other - means a lot Anyway, whatever his reasons, he's now unblocked me (I wrote on his sister's wall and saw his profile was back in the family bit) so that lasted all of 2 days unless he's just doing it to see my profile. My guess is he was wanting a reaction? Who knows. Either way, I've come to the conclusion that you are all right...why should I care? Someone who disrespects you isn't worth it.
Exit Posted January 20, 2012 Posted January 20, 2012 Are you and his sister good enough friends that it would be a big loss to stop talking to her? I'm glad you're feeling better but I just feel like it won't be long until you see something else upsetting on FB, especially if you are in touch with his family members. Whatever makes you happy, just think about taking some preventative measures so you don't have to get your feelings hurt like you did this week when random stuff on FB changes.
CopingGal Posted January 21, 2012 Posted January 21, 2012 I think about going to my ex's facebook page all the time...but I don't. I'm glad I blocked him. I am not going to unblock him or get to his page by other means. This thread has convinced me to keep him blocked. My ex did not block me, but he had a secret facebook page, talked to his ex on facebook while lying and telling me he did not have a page, refused to put me on facebook, and then put the woman he cheated on me with on his facebook page. Then had the nerve to try to befriend me on faceboook again. I will never go to his facebook page again. I have not been there for a long time. Facebook is a very, very painful thing for some people. Sometimes I wish it never existed.
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