How can I go about talking girl out of joining the Marines and get a degree instead?

[trojans10]

This girl ive been seeing for a while is on her way to bootcamp in 27 days, and i don't think its for her...

 

how do i handle this...she needs a few more credits until she gets her associates degree at age 18! Wouldn't it be wise to get your degree before going into the military or even think of it?

 

honest opinions please.

[Philosoraptor]

I'd agree it would be wise if she was that close to a degree.. but it's her life to live and only she can decide which path she wants to take.

[Emilia]

This girl ive been seeing for a while is on her way to bootcamp in 27 days, and i don't think its for her...

 

how do i handle this...she needs a few more credits until she gets her associates degree at age 18! Wouldn't it be wise to get your degree before going into the military or even think of it?

 

honest opinions please.

 

I had to deal with exactly the same thing 3 years ago. He went off and joined the armed forces (UK) without a degree and he is of course hating the whole thing and when he comes out he will be older without any decent qualifications to his name. He also dropped out of officer training (long story).

 

At least if she really hates it at the age of 21 or 22 she can go back to school, she won't be too old. My ex is 24 now and he will stick it out for a while so who knows what options he will have when he eventually leaves.

 

People have to make their own mistakes.

[USMCHokie]

You don't.

 

Would you still approach this the same if you were able to convince her not to join but not be able to see her ever again? I have a feeling your motivations are a little more about you and less about her...

[jerbear]

You don't.

 

Would you still approach this the same if you were able to convince her not to join but not be able to see her ever again? I have a feeling your motivations are a little more about you and less about her...

 

Ding!!!

 

 

I think she'll qualify for college payment after and maybe even during her time there.

[trojans10]

You don't.

 

Would you still approach this the same if you were able to convince her not to join but not be able to see her ever again? I have a feeling your motivations are a little more about you and less about her...

 

 

Hey brah, tbh...if she told me she was moving away for college, or moving away for various reasons i would be completely fine with it. the fact she is joining the marines is what gets me man. i know your are in the usmc, and i have a great deal of respect for you guys, but i don't believe a female especially her should be joining. doesn't make any sense at all that guys need 20 pullups, while a female just needs to hold herself up for 70 seconds???? i also believe an 18 year old girl has more options that the Marines...especially when she only needs a few more classes for a degree...why not join in as an officer later on?? also, not to mention the statistics of veteran female marines once there done...

 

overall, i hope you understand where im coming from, because i damn well understand where your coming from. our military is amazing. i would never let my sister/daughter/mother/gf/female friend to join. all im saying...there better opportunities out there for woman and the Marines is not one of them.

[trojans10]

I had to deal with exactly the same thing 3 years ago. He went off and joined the armed forces (UK) without a degree and he is of course hating the whole thing and when he comes out he will be older without any decent qualifications to his name. He also dropped out of officer training (long story).

 

At least if she really hates it at the age of 21 or 22 she can go back to school, she won't be too old. My ex is 24 now and he will stick it out for a while so who knows what options he will have when he eventually leaves.

 

People have to make their own mistakes.

 

thanks for the response. i agree that she should take another semester and finish for Associates degree, than think about whether she wants a BA or to join again. i think this is the absolute best route...

 

when you say your bf didn't enjoy it... thats what im worried about. a girl who just turned 18 doesn't know any better right now. when i was 18 i wanted to be something, but know that i just turned 21 I am know headed into a different career path. her recruiters are also all over her nuts as well, posting on her facebook and all. give me a break, a recruiter shouldn't have any contact unless at PT or if she has any questions. not adding her to fb so he can try and push it even more and look out for her in my opinion..negative way.

 

like i said above...she has more opportunities in life right now than to join the Military, if anything why not wait a little bit? why the rush? were going to have a new president soon hopefully...maybe things will change for the better or worse? i can only think of the positives when it comes to holding out to join the marines...

 

you should be joining for the right reasons, which is to protect you nation and family. THAT IS ALL.

 

If any other reason; don't want to go to school anymore, money, lost in life, travel...etc. there are more options!!! she can go study abroad in japan for ***s sake...

[trojans10]

Ding!!!

 

 

I think she'll qualify for college payment after and maybe even during her time there.

 

mehh, after speaking with a few of my marine friends this weekend. they also agreed to wait it out and get a degree especially for a female because shes most likely to do the dirty work once done with bootcamp such as cleaning, cafeteria, etc...they also expressed their opinions on women to myself and some stories that they have witnessed firsthand. as well, as telling me that there is no guarentee for anything once your in the military and that has to do with college. with the economy in the ****s now, there is no guarentee she will be funded to go to college!

 

 

thanks for the response. i agree that she should take another semester and finish for Associates degree, than think about whether she wants a BA or to join again. i think this is the absolute best route...

 

when you say your bf didn't enjoy it... thats what im worried about. a girl who just turned 18 doesn't know any better right now. when i was 18 i wanted to be something, but know that i just turned 21 I am know headed into a different career path. her recruiters are also all over her nuts as well, posting on her facebook and all. give me a break, a recruiter shouldn't have any contact unless at PT or if she has any questions. not adding her to fb so he can try and push it even more and look out for her in my opinion..negative way.

 

like i said above...she has more opportunities in life right now than to join the Military, if anything why not wait a little bit? why the rush? were going to have a new president soon hopefully...maybe things will change for the better or worse? i can only think of the positives when it comes to holding out to join the marines...

 

you should be joining for the right reasons, which is to protect you nation and family. THAT IS ALL.

 

If any other reason; don't want to go to school anymore, money, lost in life, travel...etc. there are more options!!! she can go study abroad in japan for ***s sake...

[denise_xo]

At the end of the day, it's her life and her choice. You can tell her your opinion about it, but after that it's really up to her.

[creighton0123]

You don't.

 

She's young. The best you can do is extend to her the benefits of ROTC training. We're still not at a point where undergraduate college programs are deadlining applications. If she's interested in the military as a career, ROTC is a much better choice than outright enlisting, since ROTC primes one for stepping in at a higher rank with essential skills.

[Emilia]

 

when you say your bf didn't enjoy it... thats what im worried about. a girl who just turned 18 doesn't know any better right now. when i was 18 i wanted to be something, but know that i just turned 21 I am know headed into a different career path. her recruiters are also all over her nuts as well, posting on her facebook and all. give me a break, a recruiter shouldn't have any contact unless at PT or if she has any questions. not adding her to fb so he can try and push it even more and look out for her in my opinion..negative way.

 

 

Agree. Personally, I hate that the armed forces recruit as young as 17 year-olds (though they can't deploy until they are 18 so you bring them back in a body bag as adults ) because what the hell does a teenager know about life? Nothing. I tend to blame the parents to be honest with you, the idiocity of 'it won't happen to my child'. The number of times I read grieving mothers saying they never thought it would happen to their sons and mention 'Queen and Country' in the same breath.... Like the Queen and the country give a f***. Anyway, this will just make me angry.

 

I don't know how it works in the US but it sounds like she won't be enlisting straight away so if she is lucky she will realise soon enough that she hates it.

 

My ex didn't really know what to do with his life though he is an excellent salesman with the gift of the gab and I tried to encourage him to focus on that. He wanted something with more substance. He isn't your average squaddie so of course he hates the Army. He is quite well brought up and a lot of the guys he is with are quite the opposite but he is very social usually so I have no doubt he has made some good mates there. The problem is he got pushed into officer training too young and he struggled with the discipline, now he is in the Parachute Regiment... like it could get any worse.

 

The only thing I can tell you is that there are times when you have to stand by and support the other person even if you don't agree with their life choices and even if you think they are making a terrible mistake. I tell my ex occasionally that whatever happens he can always come to me but of course he shuts me out a lot of the time - but not always

 

Don't expect many people to understand this by the way. It sucks but there are times in your life when something major happens, it doesn't make sense and there is nothing you can do to prevent it but stand by and watch it unfold.