imfromhoiland Posted January 10, 2012 Posted January 10, 2012 The title pretty much says it all. Quick background: I'm 24 years old and have not had very much "normal" dating experience. The last girl I dated just got out of an engagement, so I'm afraid I can't use that as a standard. I've been seeing this girl for about a month now. Sometimes it seems like things are going wonderful, she look at me longingly, we've kissed a couple times, and it feels right. At other times, it feels that she very detached and has her walls up. I think she's being cautious because both A) she was hurt in the past and B) doesn't want to screw stuff up. But again she is also detached at times and doesn't show that wanting to be with me. So, how do I know that I'm doing everything right, me having a lack of experience dating? How do I know I'm doing something wrong? Is this something that I should ask her or not? Please provide your experiences, how things were going, how you felt they were, and how they turned out. Thank you!
Author imfromhoiland Posted January 11, 2012 Author Posted January 11, 2012 My experience. Always be positive. Never act desperate with her. Be patient. Never get angry or pout if she turns down a date..stay classy in the tough times. This is a real plus when courting gals who have had previous moody or verbally abusive partners. They now long for a stable, responsible partner. What works like a charm is to bring up little things she's said in the past. It shows her that you listen and that you care. For instance if a gal mentions a certain band, the next time I email her (I'm old and don't text), I'll mention that I looked them up on Youtube and perhaps give a link. But don't 'smother' her with too much. It's showing that you are thoughtful. Most women really cut us guys a lot of slack if we try. Do little things rather than plan big dates. A walk in the park with an ice cream can't be topped. You want chances to show her how you interact with others. Are you polite with the sales clerk? Say hello to seniors on a bench...pat a dog on the head? Don't underestimate these things. Hopefully you are a nice guy and you want a gal who appreciates you being a nice guy. Thanks, this helps a bunch. She did tell me early on that she was a push over with her older boyfriends and she really didn't like that. I've made a concerted effort to try to make her pick a tv show or movie, or something simple like that, even if she shrugs her shoulders or says "I don't care" (even though it pained me a little to watch Dance Moms, haha). In turn she flipped to the playoff game during the commercials which I appreciated. That part seemed to go well!
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