bean1 Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 You really have to put down whatever book you are reading I am starting to feel sorry for you here. "Withholding sex" is when your husband won't stop playing WoW so you refuse to have sex until he stops. This is just a girl who doesn't seem to enjoy it and doesn't want to do it with you. These are completely different things. A woman cannot "withhold sex" from a man who calls her once a week. It just means she didn't want to have sex on that particular night. I don't even know where to begin so I'll just leave it at that I guess. This whole thread is just and she needs to smarten up and stop answering those crumbs that you are offering. You will be a good "lesson" to her when she looks back in a few years and realizes how sad the situation was.
Dust Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 I'm not saying this poster is genuine. Especialy if he has the same thread in 3 different spots an pastes cookie cutter responses... But I really dislike everyone coming down on him so harsh and acting like the girl is some kind of victim. He just asked a question why? He owes not a fcking ounce of flesh to this girl. There is such a thing as just having fun with a girl. Get over it people. As far as the PUA talk in the begining I felt bad for the OP being so into that stuff that he would talk to us like that not for the girl. He needs to look after himself the way she needs to look after herself. If he likes this girl and wants her to be his gf then looking after himself would include presenting those feelings to her in a genuine way before he loses her. If he just wonders why and likes things the way they are then we should give our opinion with out judging the guy.
ditzchic Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 I think some of you have it right - she feels "slutty" for banging a guy on the regular without a "title". It could be that she wants a relationship, but is afraid of articulating her desires for fear of scaring me away. And she's withholding sex as a test to see if I stick around. (ie. if he's still dating me, he likes ME and not just the sex.) The fact that she invited me in to meet her parents on the 4th date implies this (though I declined). She's probably had guys in her past scram at the first mention of the R word, so she's probably being very tentative because she's maybe afraid to lose me, and she's withdrawing physically out of fear of getting too emotionally attached and hurt in the process. Problem is I always wait for the girl to pop the "what are we?" question. When it's the guy pushing for the relationship it never seems to work out well as the girl doesn't feel like she's earned or "won over" the guy. So we may have arrived at a detente. Another problem is I tease her mercilessly, yet I'm very sparse about giving her compliments so she may even think I don't really value her very much as a person. On the other hand, if she showed more softness/femininity/physical affection I'd be much more liberal in this respect. I tend to mirror the energy of the girl I'm dating. If she's a little cold and aloof, I respond in kind. If she's warm and affectionate I respond the same way. In my experience, in a feminist smothering girls with affection only chases them away. On the other hand, I get the sense that this is a girl that responds to brute displays of masculinity (ie. being picked up and thrown on the bed, the desire for rough sex) and her ex-bf looked like a bit of a white trash sleazebag - and she stuck with this guy for 2 years. I'm wondering if this is symptomatic of latent daddy issues. So getting too "soft" or "romantic" may even drive ber away. Like most girls in their early 20s she probably doesn't even know what she wants. Not really sure how to play this one... So basically you are text book incompatible. Leave her go, man. Find someone more attune with your own wants and needs. No need to drag it out any further. Neither of you are getting what you want.
bean1 Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 I'm not saying this poster is genuine. Especialy if he has the same thread in 3 different spots an pastes cookie cutter responses... But I really dislike everyone coming down on him so harsh and acting like the girl is some kind of victim. He just asked a question why? He owes not a fcking ounce of flesh to this girl. There is such a thing as just having fun with a girl. Get over it people. As far as the PUA talk in the begining I felt bad for the OP being so into that stuff that he would talk to us like that not for the girl. He needs to look after himself the way she needs to look after herself. If he likes this girl and wants her to be his gf then looking after himself would include presenting those feelings to her in a genuine way before he loses her. If he just wonders why and likes things the way they are then we should give our opinion with out judging the guy. I don't disagree with you either - but I have to say they are both clueless. Since he's been roasted a million times, it's worth pointing out that if she doesn't like this behaviour (and no woman would), then she needs to put on her big girl panties and stop taking his crumbs and thinking this will morph into something more than it is. I think her behaviour is pretty clear: she wants more than just "fun" if she wants him to meet her parents (and limping after 30 minutes with no orgasm makes it difficult to believe she's having any fun in the first place), but he is cold with interest (a call a week is scraps), so she should have put the brakes on it. She said no sex, probably because she was just fed up with the situation. But she should have told him, otherwise he will think she likes it (and it seems he does).
Lucky_One Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 If she comes here to ask for advice, then I'll come down on her for not telling him straight what she needs or does not need from a relationship. Until then, I will continue to come down on a guy who posts crap like this. I really don't care for players who treat women as disposable cum-buckets. (I don't like women who treat men as disposable wallets, either - so I am not gender biased.)
Mme. Chaucer Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 You can't even reply with something original? Why don't you just agree with all the "SoSuave" nutbags that she must be having a herpes outreak?? I know. The ONLY reason she does not want to repeat, and repeat, and repeat the identical painful, emotionally and physically unsatisfying experience HAS to be an STD. Or, barring that, menstruation. OP - why do you keep posting the exact same things on multiple boards? I've asked you this before, and had no answer - and I just asked it again on your other new thread that also appears on sosuave. What's the point?
Mme. Chaucer Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 I actually don't have any feelings about the girl, one way or another. I just think that all the information the OP has given us has provided us with multiple reasons why she would not want to have sex with him, without even venturing into herpes or periods. Don't you think so?
xxoo Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 OP, if you like the girl, and you want to spend more time in her company, why not take a shot about being "real" with her, and telling her how you feel? You say she's been tight-lipped, but how forthcoming have you been? You say she's been playing games. Aren't you the King of Games? If you just want the key to more NSA sex from her, I don't know what to say. Other than, that's pretty crappy
Author spinaroonie Posted January 11, 2012 Author Posted January 11, 2012 If she comes here to ask for advice, then I'll come down on her for not telling him straight what she needs or does not need from a relationship. Until then, I will continue to come down on a guy who posts crap like this. I really don't care for players who treat women as disposable cum-buckets. (I don't like women who treat men as disposable wallets, either - so I am not gender biased.) What leads you to believe that she was "giving" sex with the expectation of an exclusive, committed relationship? Not every girl "gives" sex with the expectation of a relationship. She "gave it up" while making no overtures towards it. I haven't used her, mistreated her or misled her in anyway. She's not a victim. A girl who desires a relationship should show more interest and put forth more effort from her end - initiating calls/texts, proposing dates, showing more affection etc. "Shyness" is not an excuse. If something's on your mind, communicate. Don't expect your guy to be a mind-reader. I'm not the bad guy here.
Lucky_One Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 A relationship is when two people interact. What do you call it when 2 people spend time together and perform the most intimate acts on each other's nude bodies? A FWB is a relationship. A marriage is a relationship. An EMA is a relationship. Committed dating is a relationship. Non-committed dating is a relationship. In each of those relationships, the participants have wants and needs, and they should communicate them.
ditzchic Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 What leads you to believe that she was "giving" sex with the expectation of an exclusive, committed relationship? Not every girl "gives" sex with the expectation of a relationship. She "gave it up" while making no overtures towards it. I haven't used her, mistreated her or misled her in anyway. She's not a victim. A girl who desires a relationship should show more interest and put forth more effort from her end - initiating calls/texts, proposing dates, showing more affection etc. "Shyness" is not an excuse. If something's on your mind, communicate. Don't expect your guy to be a mind-reader. I'm not the bad guy here. I'm not saying you're a bad guy and I agree that if she were REALLY interested in a relationship with you she would make more of an effort. It's pretty obvious she isn't THAT interested. Now it's getting to the point where it's affecting the sex. I've been that girl before. He wasn't boyfriend material but I really wanted him to be so I tried to wait it out. It's a tough lesson learned that you should trust your gut. It's simple really. If you want an actual relationship from her things are going to have to change. Try and change things by having a genuine talk with her about where you both stand and what you both want. If you want to keep getting free tang from her NSA, you won't be for very long. Move on to someone who is interested enough to put out.
xxoo Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 I'm not the bad guy here. And she is? The only thing making you the "bad guy" is the way you are posting negatively about this girl on multiple places on the internet just because she no longer wants to have sex with you Did you actually post her photo on one site?
xpaperxcutx Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 I'm beginning to wonder if this is an ego thing for you. I've seen guys' with inflated " heads" take a nose dive in the ego department because a girl refuses to give them the time of day. When you post multiple threads on different forums and use PUA to describe the nature of a relationship and has the audacity to even place any kind of blame on the girl for refusing to have sex, you're the most guilty. And no means no, or is that a birds and bees lesson you failed when you were a kid/
ditzchic Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 And she is? The only thing making you the "bad guy" is the way you are posting negatively about this girl on multiple places on the internet just because she no longer wants to have sex with you Did you actually post her photo on one site? You posted her photo?!?!?!?! That is the most insane thing I have ever heard!!! My God I hope she sees that and responds on those threads about she doesn't want to have sex with you because you are the worst sex she's ever had. ever. If that's true you really need to be knocked down a few pegs. You have no respect for anyone if you can do something like that.
Lucky_One Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 If he posted her photo, I haven't seen it. But he does record his freaking conversations with women and upload them to the internet, so he can show off his "closing" technique. To give him the barest semblance of decency, he DID cut the recording off before you get to hear all 10 digits of her phone number; you do get to hear the first 6 digits and find out the city where she lives. Dood - that is just freaking WRONG. Do you secretly record them having sex with you, too??
xpaperxcutx Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 If he posted her photo, I haven't seen it. But he does record his freaking conversations with women and upload them to the internet, so he can show off his "closing" technique. To give him the barest semblance of decency, he DID cut the recording off before you get to hear all 10 digits of her phone number; you do get to hear the first 6 digits and find out the city where she lives. Dood - that is just freaking WRONG. Do you secretly record them having sex with you, too?? Isn't there a law against these things?
xxoo Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 ftr, I didn't see a photo.....just a link that suggested a photo. Not on loveshack, but on one of the threads linked on this thread.
ditzchic Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 If he posted her photo, I haven't seen it. But he does record his freaking conversations with women and upload them to the internet, so he can show off his "closing" technique. To give him the barest semblance of decency, he DID cut the recording off before you get to hear all 10 digits of her phone number; you do get to hear the first 6 digits and find out the city where she lives. Dood - that is just freaking WRONG. Do you secretly record them having sex with you, too?? New theory. This girl's creepdar is ringing like a bell. She isn't having sex with you because she's uncomfortable. Rightly so. You're a special breed of gross, OP.
Lucky_One Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 Isn't there a law against these things? Not where he is from. Only one party of a conversation has to be aware that the recording is taking place; that sort of recording is legal in 37 states, DC, and Canada. He would, however, be doing something illegal if he is using a surreptitious recording device, as it is illegal to possess one of those; he must use something open like a tape recorder, a dictaphone or an ipod. 44 recordings of him trying to prove he is a stud by getting a girl's telephone number. And the majority of them start with, "Um, excuse me? Quick question. Do you know how to get to the bookstore?" Creeper.
dasein Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 Chaucer this thread is a poster child example of "hissing, spitting" replies from women. Who gives a rat f where else this poster posts or his other posts? Hilarious that some of you "hisser-spitters" are stalking him all over the internet. I hope he copypastes this entire thread onto sosauve for some s&giggles among the members there.
xxoo Posted January 11, 2012 Posted January 11, 2012 Chaucer this thread is a poster child example of "hissing, spitting" replies from women. Who gives a rat f where else this poster posts or his other posts? Hilarious that some of you "hisser-spitters" are stalking him all over the internet. I hope he copypastes this entire thread onto sosauve for some s&giggles among the members there. The links were posted on this thread by a MALE poster, but nice try
snowflakes88 Posted January 12, 2012 Posted January 12, 2012 But he does record his freaking conversations with women and upload them to the internet, so he can show off his "closing" technique. This is quite possibly the most pathetic thing I've ever heard.
Disenchantedly Yours Posted January 12, 2012 Posted January 12, 2012 It's nice to see a guy talk trash about a girl he is sleeping with and a few LS guys still defend him. WHy would you even want to align with this guy? He's a spaz.
dasein Posted January 12, 2012 Posted January 12, 2012 The links were posted on this thread by a MALE poster, but nice try Huh? Links? Is there an argument in there or just more typical LS female non sequitur?
dasein Posted January 12, 2012 Posted January 12, 2012 It's nice to see a guy talk trash about a girl he is sleeping with and a few LS guys still defend him. WHy would you even want to align with this guy? He's a spaz. Quote one single post in this thread where any LS guy is "defending" OP. There's not one. Most of the male posts here are either critical of OP or neutral OR getting annoyed about the standard harpy bandwagon treatment in these parts. This thread is full of bandwagoning, spiteful nonsense having NOTHING to do with the thread topic.
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