rose45 Posted January 8, 2012 Posted January 8, 2012 Here is a dating question: I met a guy from online. We started speaking in December and it was a hard time to meet during the holidays. We still pretty much either spoke or texted every day or every few days. He was pretty good at calling. He wasn't someone who just texted which is nice. We met this week and it was a nice, normal, fun time. He said he would call tomorrow. He didnt. He texted me though in the afternoon saying he had a really good time and that I looked great and that we need to have another date soon etc. I responded back and that was it--which is ok I guess So I guess i am partially wondering what he did friday night. Now it's saturday and he called in the early evening. He asked about my plans and I said probably stopping over a friends place and he said the same. I just find it odd for two single guys to just hang out at his place. So i was thinking either he was going to a girls place or on a date or something. He called me when he got home from his errands. I missed the call and texted back about 50 minutes later just simply saying if you're with your friend have a good time etc. He wrote how he just got here and we'll talk tom. I know it's very early and who knows if him and i will be still be seeing each other..is this normal behavior for early on? I guess i feel if there is no contact whatsoever on a friday, saturday night..they are probably with someone else....of course I know it's allowed..we aren't exclusive..but i guess I am just wondering..i think i could like him but don't want to get attached early on especially when I could be competing with whoever else he is dating.
HughHardcastle Posted January 8, 2012 Posted January 8, 2012 Seems weird to me that he wouldn't at least invite you to do something or join him. Have you met in "real life" yet? If not, he's probably just waiting for that meeting, which would most likely be a 1 on 1 thing.
xpaperxcutx Posted January 8, 2012 Posted January 8, 2012 Seems weird to me that he wouldn't at least invite you to do something or join him. Have you met in "real life" yet? If not, he's probably just waiting for that meeting, which would most likely be a 1 on 1 thing. You don't read do you ? She said they just met. OP, I would not jump to conclusions just yet because you only met once. If I jump to conclusion about every guy I've dated I'd need to see a psych. So what makes you think his friend isn't a guy? If he didn't elaborate it still doesn't mean he's dating someone else. Of course, since you did meet online, multi-dating is the norm. If you feel insecure already, you're out of luck.
HughHardcastle Posted January 8, 2012 Posted January 8, 2012 You don't read do you ? She said they just met. Actually, I did read that part, but I forgot it from the time I finished reading to the time I typed up my response. So it's more of a memory or attention problem than that of reading comprehension.
fortyninethousand322 Posted January 8, 2012 Posted January 8, 2012 Here is a dating question: I met a guy from online. We started speaking in December and it was a hard time to meet during the holidays. We still pretty much either spoke or texted every day or every few days. He was pretty good at calling. He wasn't someone who just texted which is nice. We met this week and it was a nice, normal, fun time. He said he would call tomorrow. He didnt. He texted me though in the afternoon saying he had a really good time and that I looked great and that we need to have another date soon etc. I responded back and that was it--which is ok I guess So I guess i am partially wondering what he did friday night. Now it's saturday and he called in the early evening. He asked about my plans and I said probably stopping over a friends place and he said the same. I just find it odd for two single guys to just hang out at his place. So i was thinking either he was going to a girls place or on a date or something. Why would that be odd? I have friends over all the time. Plus with college football bowl games wrapping up this week and the NFL playoffs starting he could be just heading over to a friend's place to watch a game. Of maybe they're playing video games or working on cars or something. Happens all the time, nothing "odd" about it.
Dust Posted January 8, 2012 Posted January 8, 2012 Why would that be odd? I have friends over all the time. Plus with college football bowl games wrapping up this week and the NFL playoffs starting he could be just heading over to a friend's place to watch a game. Of maybe they're playing video games or working on cars or something. Happens all the time, nothing "odd" about it. Ah women, finding it odd for two single guys to hang out like there must be some S&M going on or something. Like two guys with wives hanging out just the two of them would some how not be odd... Most single guys either hang out with no one... or another single guy. Yeah I can't count the number of times I just went over to a guy friends house and just had a beer or did nothing. Although it very well could be a girl. Because if I was going to hang out with a guy and I just met a new girl or any girl for that matter I'd put her sweet little heart at ease by making it clear I was hanging out with my guy friend. "Just going to hang out with my bud Omicron. Thats a mans name incase you're confused.. I call him Omicron his real names Chase... we're going to play scrabble then jack off on to a cookie to feed to the girl who just moved in below him... thats not odd is it...?"
Cracker Jack Posted January 8, 2012 Posted January 8, 2012 I think you're reading too much into something that isn't really there. It's not odd at all.
Author rose45 Posted January 22, 2012 Author Posted January 22, 2012 (edited) here is an update: I think my feeling that something is off may be right? Ever since we met I feel like he doesn't call most nights like he was and he hasn't asked to meet up again and our first date was 2 weeks ago..busy is one thing but i don't think he is that busy. Is it supposed to be very obvious when he is dating others? b/c I feel like weekends I don't hear from him much. Unless he is just taking things very very slow now that we met. The past few times when he texted he did say how he is looking forward to seeing me again etc and how he will call and he didn't. I looked past it and never bothered asking why b/c he isn't my boyfriend and i never acted needy..but I decided to speak up and joke a little when he texted me friday..He said he is sorry he hasn't been speaking to me and how is everyhting and he will call later..i said yea, you have been busy since we met. And wrote a sarcastic suuuure when he said he will call later. I'm not a doormat..there is only so many times you can keep saying that; he said he definitely will and he did around 8pm..i decided not to pick up or call back that night since I feel I shouldn't be so available after all of this. I called back saturday and even texted him around 8 or 9 how is your day? NO Response at all. I just think it's very obvious he is definitely dating a few girls ..if you are with friends you can't respond? And then he will usually text like nothing happened a few days later...i know we aren't exclusive and it was one date but I just don't wanna be a doormat and one of 10 girls to just be disappointed. I'm not really into serial dating He called today and i called back a few hours later b/c i was busy and he sounded busy yet again which is fine but it's just getting annoying... ughhh..the sad part is he does sound nice and normal which is definitely hard to find i've noticed with my experiences lately..... some part of me just wants to text him next time and say listen for whatever reason you aren't as interested or available which is fine..good luck in your search Or just treat him as a friend for now with no expectations and leave him open as a possibility and continue my search..it just gets annoying when a guy will randomly call or text and not give a reason of why they didn't respond that night or what exactly they have planned for the weekend..it's very vague what he does or where he does. Edited January 22, 2012 by rose45
Cypress25 Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 It doesn't even matter at this point if he's dating other girls, the weird thing is that he kept saying he wanted to see you again but he never tried to make concrete plans. He just kept saying "I'll call you tomorrow" instead of asking you out for a specific date and time. Sounds like he was just stringing you along with phone calls and texts, with no intention of going on a second date. Forget about him, onto the next.
Fondue Posted January 22, 2012 Posted January 22, 2012 here is an update: he said he definitely will and he did around 8pm..i decided not to pick up or call back that night since I feel I shouldn't be so available after all of this. I called back saturday and even texted him around 8 or 9 how is your day? NO Response at all. I just think it's very obvious he is definitely dating a few girls ..if you are with friends you can't respond? And then he will usually text like nothing happened a few days later... Do you not see the hypocrisy in this? You purposefully did not answer his call, full knowing you were able to do so, but then when you called him back a day later, you get pissy because he didn't answer or reply to a text immediately? I'm just going to leave it at that.
Author rose45 Posted January 22, 2012 Author Posted January 22, 2012 there is no hypocrisy..this is the first time i am doing something like this after numerous times I don't get a response and pretty vague answers about the weekend. I guess i never experienced dating where it seems obvious he is dating other girls..i like to give the person a chance. I guess for now just treat him as he is treating me and continue dating and look at a him as a friend for now? I get the feeling if he does it again I will probably break and just say for whatever reason it's obvious you aren't as interested and I actually think you may already be somewhat involved with someone etc.
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