dave22 Posted January 8, 2012 Posted January 8, 2012 (edited) I am not sure how exactly to describe my relationship with this girl, other than for the past year I have had a good and sometimes very close friendship with her that has not always been strictly platonic. I am crazy about her in some ways. During the time, which lasted several months, when we were spending time together most days of the week we got along great, and I never got tired of being around her which is very rare for me. And when we had a brief fling last summer, it was very passionate. Anyways we have had some fights over the last few months (three of them), mostly due to my frustration and my mistrust of her intentions. We have gradually spent less time together. The interesting thing is that she has said spending less time together has made her realize how much she likes me and misses me when we don't see each other. She has also said that at times she has felt like she is falling in love with me but has stopped herself because she isn't sure if she can trust that I won't do something that would hurt her again. A week ago she made me promise that if she kissed me, I would just act like a normal guy and not get all weird about it again (it had been months since we had actually got this far). We kissed, she said it was really good but she would be wondering the next morning what I would do. We haven't seen each other all week now as she seems reluctant to meet with me right now. I am going to believe she just wants to know if she can trust me. I have had enough time to think about it and realize I have just had a really difficult time trusting her and myself (she broke up with me last summer just as I felt I was falling in love with her, and I don't think I have ever been in love before). I have been hurt in relationships before and there are reasons why I have had trouble trusting her (she broke up with me last summer just as I felt I was falling in love with her, and I don't think I have ever been in love before. At the time she didn't think it should have been a big deal). Anyways, I think now that I know what I was doing wrong, I am ready to try a relationship. But of course I can't be completely sure. She has been patient with me and so I am going to be patient with her this time. But I wonder sometimes whether we are both crazy that we keep trying even though it never works out. I mean it has been about seven months of trying. Is this normal? Don't most people give up by this point? I don't think I will give up, though, as long as she is still trying. Is this a good sign that we are committed to try and make this work? Or am I just too stubborn? Edited January 8, 2012 by dave22
soulm8 Posted January 8, 2012 Posted January 8, 2012 I am not sure how exactly to describe my relationship with this girl, other than for the past year I have had a good and sometimes very close friendship with her that has not always been strictly platonic. I am crazy about her in some ways. During the time, which lasted several months, when we were spending time together most days of the week we got along great, and I never got tired of being around her which is very rare for me. And when we had a brief fling last summer, it was very passionate. Anyways we have had some fights over the last few months (three of them), mostly due to my frustration and my mistrust of her intentions. She has also said that at times she has felt like she is falling in love with me but has stopped herself because she isn't sure if she can trust that I won't do something that would hurt her again. A week ago she made me promise that if she kissed me, I would just act like a normal guy and not get all weird about it again (it had been months since we had actually got this far). We kissed, she said it was really good but she would be wondering the next morning what I would do. We haven't seen each other all week now as she seems reluctant to meet with me right now. I am going to believe she just wants to know if she can trust me. I have had enough time to think about it and realize I have just had a really difficult time trusting her and myself (she broke up with me last summer just as I felt I was falling in love with her, and I don't think I have ever been in love before). I have been hurt in relationships before and there are reasons why I have had trouble trusting her. At the time she didn't think it should have been a big deal). Anyways, I think now that I know what I was doing wrong, I am ready to try a relationship. But of course I can't be completely sure. She has been patient with me and so I am going to be patient with her this time. But I wonder sometimes whether we are both crazy that we keep trying even though it never works out. I mean it has been about seven months of trying. Is this normal? Don't most people give up by this point? I don't think I will give up, though, as long as she is still trying. Is this a good sign that we are committed to try and make this work? Or am I just too stubborn? Yes, many would have given up by this point... but that's them. This is you and her. I've read your post a few times now, and I'm not sure what else to say. What happened last summer when you "got weird" and she "broke up with you"? What were you doing wrong?
Recommended Posts