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Do you ever worry about someone you used to date?


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Posted

Weird question I know, but towards the end of college I was dating a girl from Yemen (dated for about 8 months). The reason things ended was because she wanted to go back to Yemen and fix their water issues (she was getting an engineering degree) and hopefully help it's economy by going into business with her father. She wanted the move to Yemen to be permanent and wanted me to move their with her. I wanted her to stay in the US. Heck, I even asked her to marry me.

 

In any case we tried to keep in touch pretty often when she first went back but then our lives, time difference, etc. made it pretty difficult. Then about six weeks ago I saw a video online about a shooting in Yemen. Pretty gruesome vid and the boy who was shot had the same last name as my former gf did and it made me think of her. So I sent her an email (she doesn't do facebook or twitter or any of that) asking how she was, how her life was, etc. I haven't gotten a response back and it worries me a little. Of course a million things could have happened (internet blackout, etc.) but still.

 

Now don't get me wrong, I totally love my current gf. She's great, funny, wonderful personality and sexy as hell; and if the other girl were to suddenly move back here I wouldn't be interested. But, my ex is someone I don't have any animosity towards and she is someone I genuinely respect and like as a person; it was a textbook truly amicable breakup.

 

So here I am genuinely worried about her safety and hoping that she's still safe (Yemen is a dangerous place these days), even as I'm happily in another wonderful relationship. Anyone ever go through something similar?

Posted

Not truly worried for their safety like in your case but I genuinely have nothing but good wishes towards my exs and would be very saddened if something bad happened to them.

 

I hope your ex-gf is ok.

Posted

Yes. One of my exes is in the Armed Forces and I bug him from time to time to get some signs that he is ok. I have a vague idea of what he is up to and whether he is in the UK or away.

  • 2 weeks later...
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Posted

Bump. Still no word. Hopefully she's ok :(

Posted

You have to prepare for the possibility that you will never know for sure how she is unfortunately. It's just something you have to process.

Posted

I think that worrying about someone you used to date is completely normal and to be expected, especially if it was an amicable break up. I know I still think about my ex and should he ever be in trouble or need help of any kind I would certainly do everything I can to help him. He is a great guy and I also have nothing but wonderful things to say about him. He was a very influential person in my life, so it would be only normal to have concern for his well being. As in your case.

 

Do you have any mutual friends or acquaintances that may have had more recent contact with her? Just because she doesn't have facebook doesn't mean it can't come in handy when trying to find out about how she is doing.

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