steve9417 Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 Appreciate thoughts / advice as i find myself in a place where i'm not sure of what to do ...... Firstly i suppose i'm what you might call a commitment phobe - its not intention i might add. I'm in my mid 40's now have been seeing someone now for 2 years, she's in her late 30's and has a 9 year old boy and at a place (and has been for a while) where she wants me to move in with her and her son; we've tentatively planned to do so in 6-8 weeks but truth be told i'm really unsure about it, I'm not sure if this is right for me and frightened about making the wrong decision. A part of me wants to finish the relationship as I'm not sure my feelings are strong enough for this big step. I'm talking to a counsellor about it but they're telling me to not make such a large decision about finishing it whilst my mother is very poorly (she has cancer at the moment and undergoing chemo which is emotionally draining). I suppose if I I'm honest I don't emotionally connect with my GF, she's a good friend but I don't feel that we have the same level of enthusiasm nor rapport that I feel is important for a life partner. I've had 4 relationships in my life which when they get to about this time in the relationship and then I tend to run for the hills emotionally and finish them. In fairness I've had these same doubts from the start, but it's only now that a date to move in together is coming up that I'm starting to feel more uncomfortable. Right now I just don't know what to do about moving in, she wants me to agree on the weekend but I i'm feeling sick to be honest about the whole thing. I'm conscious that I can't go on dating her indefinitely and there's only one way to work out if my fears / concerns are just a part of my commitment phobic side or not. Advice / thoughts appreciated as I find putting my raw feelings out there sometimes helps ....... thanks
alphamale Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 dude DO NOT MOVE IN WITH THIS BROAD. keep your own pad and your freedom.
Philosoraptor Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 If you're not feeling it right now then be honest and tell her you would like to wait awhile.
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