Cerpin_Taxt Posted December 31, 2011 Posted December 31, 2011 I quit on-line dating. It's not worth my time. It's too easy for me to pick and choose and it's too easy to be pick and chosen. By that I mean that it's too easy for some one to look at you and dismiss you based on looks, profile, status, etc. There is no connection with on-line dating. If someone doesn't fit your "needs" then on to the next one. It's too easy to pass over people. I do it too. I've seen the flaws in the system in myself. Don't say you don't do it, because you would be a liar if you did. There's no connection on-line. There are only stats and photos. No one meets on a whim anymore, if they ever did. If the profile isn't perfect, there is no point in meeting them, right? This is what I mean by "pick and choose." Dating is a social thing that should only be done in person. I suck on-line, but have met more women in person than I ever could on-line. Personality cannot be perceived, no matter how complex the dating profile, on-line. You only get to know some one in person. Discuss.
Author Cerpin_Taxt Posted December 31, 2011 Author Posted December 31, 2011 I'm sorry. I meant discuss or flame. Depending...
mortensorchid Posted December 31, 2011 Posted December 31, 2011 Honestly, I cannot think of why it is that someone would want to do it anymore. It's good for your ego, in that you may or may not meet some people, have a meal/drink or two, but you will not meet "Mr./Miss Right" this way. You might meet a Mr./Miss Right Now, but don't expect them to hang around for a long time. I makes you get out of the house and try something new, but don't hold your breath that it's going to be the path to enlightenment. Hope that doesn't sound bitter, but I've had enough experiences with this to know how some people do/don't operate.
Pizzaman81 Posted December 31, 2011 Posted December 31, 2011 I am actually having a lot of luck with it. Don't give up!
thatone Posted December 31, 2011 Posted December 31, 2011 i did it for a few months with decent success as far as pulling first dates, but the more i thought about it, i don't like it either. it ruins part of the 'game' for me. if i go sit down at a bar and pull a phone number or two, i did that, that's me. it's an ego thing to an extent. a dating site is more like flipping through a catalog and most of the time what you're ordering arrives severely damaged at best, or more likely, never at all.
KathyM Posted December 31, 2011 Posted December 31, 2011 I know several people who had a lot of success with online dating, so it does work for some. Might as well use whatever tools there are available, and certainly OLD has the potential to bring a lot of people into your dating sphere than you would be able to find IRL. I can think of several people I know who met their SO through OLD, who would not have met them IRL, so it does work for some. It has its advantages, but it's just one option, and certainly shouldn't be the only method used. It is easier to meet people who are interested in a relationship through OLD than it is to just approach people IRL whom you don't know if they are available, don't know anything about them, etc., and I think most people handle rejection easier online than if they had to put themselves out there IRL and face rejection.
oaks Posted December 31, 2011 Posted December 31, 2011 If the profile isn't perfect, there is no point in meeting them, right? I guess some people over the last year thought my profile was perfect, then. I met my gf from an online site. Things are going well so far, and if we split up it won't be the fault of the dating site.
Peace&Love Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 I can think of several people I know who met their SO through OLD, who would not have met them IRL, so it does work for some. It has its advantages, but it's just one option, and certainly shouldn't be the only method used. It is easier to meet people who are interested in a relationship through OLD than it is to just approach people IRL whom you don't know if they are available, don't know anything about them, etc., and I think most people handle rejection easier online than if they had to put themselves out there IRL and face rejection. I completely agree with Kathy, especially on the part about keeping yourself opened to meeting someone IRL while you're doing OLD. I also have to throw in my two cents here because I finally tried OLD for the first time a couple months ago. Yes, it is just like flipping through a catalog. I'm pretty sure I would have a better feel about the guys I'm browsing through if I met them first in person, but while I'm online I won't give them a second glance. Nothing can replace the one-on-one meeting, so keep your options opened. Also don't be shy about asking a girl you meet online to go on a first date ASAP. Just explain that you think meeting in person, over coffee, will give her a better opportunity to get to know you easier and you vice-versa.
monkey00 Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 I kind of see what the OP is saying but I don't really feel that way. I started doing OLD a month ago and I've kind of built a thick skin for it. In fact I've had better luck meeting people from OLD than in person. The gamble with IRL is you don't know whether the person is in a R, not interested, or gay...you just have to take your chances when you approach them. Whereas OLD, everyone is drinking the same kool-aid and in the same boat as you. Though I will have to say I kind of feel a bit empty inside lately. I wonder if it's because I'm messaging back and forth with a few other girls while multi-dating. It kind of makes me feel that every prospect in the dating scene is expendable...that there will always be someone around the corner if things don't work out for me in the present. It can get addictive. To the OP, if you're interested in meeting someone from OLD - realistically you should only be sending a few messages and planning a date by then. The majority of people on OLD prefer to go on a date ASAP vs sending a bunch of messages. Talk is boring, dating and seeing someone in person funner.
Disillusioned Posted January 3, 2012 Posted January 3, 2012 Sounds like the OP would be better off switching from OLD to singles groups on Meetup. The worst that can happen is you'd meet an ILR troll.
Tom81 Posted January 4, 2012 Posted January 4, 2012 Yeah, I've gone on several dates from OLD. I've had several second dates...no third dates. A couple I thought were really good but the girl went cold on me and I didn't hear back after 2nd date...gotta love when that happens. The more I date online I do think it would be better to meet someone in real life, but for me that's hard as I have a little low confidence and I'm shy to start things off. After a good 15 min I'm good...but when trying to meet some off line, all you got is those 15 min or even less to make an impression. Either way good luck OP.
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