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Male virgin = Seeing an escort??


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Posted
So you want to take love out of the equation, and make it just a physical act, and somehow that appeals to you more than demonstrating your love for someone through sex? Hmm. You have some strange ideas there. Making love can involve not only exciting, passionate, mind blowing sex, but also an emotional connection with someone you have real feelings for. If anything, having sex with someone who is so mechanical as a prostitute would be, and who has no feelings for you whatsoever, would be the boring and lame thing.

 

I had always got the impression that making love was just slow and boring, and just wasn't the same thing as actually '****ing'.

 

So maybe I would want to take love out of the equation. It does seem that when I develop strong feelings for someone, I don't feel sexually attracted to them anymore.

Posted
No, none of the articles I've read on the subject were from conservative or religious sources. You are only speaking about your own experience, but studies/opinion polls taken from a large cross section of the public show that a lot of men are not that good at it, despite how many women they've bedded. There are various reasons for this, one being that porn has warped the minds of men and taught them to have a faulty concept of what pleases a woman. A lot of men are impatient, and are not into taking the time for a good amount of foreplay, and are generally uneducated about how to please a woman. A lot of men are not creative in bed, and are "selfish lovers". It's not about quantity, it's about quality. A lot of men also don't know how to delay their orgasm in order to last longer, and they don't know how to stimulate a woman to give her mind blowing orgasms. Hence, there are a lot of mediocre or worse sexual partners out there, so a virgin is not necessarily going to stand out as much worse than the mainstream of people.

 

All the articles were about people's experiences though, the same way I was talking about my experience. It's subjective, no-one goes and surveys hundreds of couples while they are having sex to see how good they are in bed. My experience is as valid as theirs and I tell you that it takes two to have good sex and that it's not that hard. I have had only 2 lovers so far that didn't know how to control their ejaculation (one had several partners before me, the other had 1) but I'm pretty sure had I pointed it out to them, they would have made the effort.

 

However, sex education (in general terms, not in school) is much better nowdays because I see from the younger men that I date that they are indeed pretty informed over what girls like and they even know where the clitoris is ;)

 

I don't think porn has that much to do with ignorance in all fairness. I think it's responsible for the increase in male curiosity towards anal sex and facials but that's about it.

Posted
I had always got the impression that making love was just slow and boring, and just wasn't the same thing as actually '****ing'.

 

So maybe I would want to take love out of the equation. It does seem that when I develop strong feelings for someone, I don't feel sexually attracted to them anymore.

If I could play a little psychologist in training here, I'd say you are developing some mixed up thinking because of the porn you watch. You've trained your mind to be turned on by sex with strangers because of the porn you watch. That is why, as soon as you start to develop real feelings for a person, you don't want to picture them in the same way you do with the strangers. You've debased your idea of sex, and since you don't want to debase your opinion of someone you care for, you separate sexual feelings from feelings of love. That's mixed up, and that is what porn will do to you. You want to be able to feel both love and sexual chemistry with the same person, don't you? ML with someone you actually do love, and having hot and passionate sex with someone you actually have an emotional connection with and are crazy about is the epitome of sexual excitement.

Posted
All the articles were about people's experiences though, the same way I was talking about my experience. It's subjective, no-one goes and surveys hundreds of couples while they are having sex to see how good they are in bed. My experience is as valid as theirs and I tell you that it takes two to have good sex and that it's not that hard. I have had only 2 lovers so far that didn't know how to control their ejaculation (one had several partners before me, the other had 1) but I'm pretty sure had I pointed it out to them, they would have made the effort.

 

However, sex education (in general terms, not in school) is much better nowdays because I see from the younger men that I date that they are indeed pretty informed over what girls like and they even know where the clitoris is ;)

 

I don't think porn has that much to do with ignorance in all fairness. I think it's responsible for the increase in male curiosity towards anal sex and facials but that's about it.

There's a lot of surveys out there, studies and articles about people's satisfaction (or lack thereof) with their sexual partner. You may have had better experiences than most, but from what I've read, there is a lot of people out there who are not that good at it, regardless of how many partners they've had. The point I'm trying to make is that the number of partners you've had does not equate to being a better lover. I've interviewed wives of men who have had a lot of sexual partners before marriage (and sometimes during marriage), and that did not equate to being a better lover. So my point is that, chances are, a virgin is not going to be severely lacking in that department compared to the majority of the population. He could learn a lot more on how to be a better lover by reading the Kama Sutra than by going to a prostitute. And he wouldn't be devaluing himself or someone else through that learning method, or risk getting some disease or arrested. The problem with porn is that it often depicts degrading women as equating to "good sex", which is not beneficial to actual relationships. It doesn't teach men how to satisfy women, it is only geared toward stimulating men. It gives them a faulty perception on how to please a woman and what pleases women, and if that is what they are basing their sexual beliefs on, then that is not helpful to actually having a good sexual relationship with a real woman.

Posted

Here's something I'll point out.

 

A man getting a prostitute, is roughly equivalent to a woman sleeping with a guy she met at a bar or club.

 

Guys who can pick up girls in bars and clubs are pretty much sluts and they get around.

 

The only difference is that a prostitute gets paid.

Posted

I couldn't care less what women who would never give me the time of day think about what i do in my spare time..

 

As a man with a high sex drive who cant attract women the only way my needs get met is through escorts..

 

Worry about your own life instead of judging others

Posted
If I could play a little psychologist in training here, I'd say you are developing some mixed up thinking because of the porn you watch. You've trained your mind to be turned on by sex with strangers because of the porn you watch. That is why, as soon as you start to develop real feelings for a person, you don't want to picture them in the same way you do with the strangers. You've debased your idea of sex, and since you don't want to debase your opinion of someone you care for, you separate sexual feelings from feelings of love. That's mixed up, and that is what porn will do to you. You want to be able to feel both love and sexual chemistry with the same person, don't you? ML with someone you actually do love, and having hot and passionate sex with someone you actually have an emotional connection with and are crazy about is the epitome of sexual excitement.

 

Plenty of other people watch porn yet the same thing hasn't happened to them.

 

I have an idea of what it might be.

Posted
I couldn't care less what women who would never give me the time of day think about what i do in my spare time..

 

As a man with a high sex drive who cant attract women the only way my needs get met is through escorts..

 

Worry about your own life instead of judging others

 

Great post. :)

Posted
Oh you're back Wolfie!! I'm so glad:love:

 

You've tried to go to a prostitute? Gross!!!!:sick::sick: I didn't realize hos turned down possible customers. That's strange. I thought they were all about making money. :confused:

 

 

Well...I have no other choice. But fret not, this society is so lame and anti-male, that you can't even pay for it without having a billion connections or knowing people who know people etc :rolleyes:.

 

 

What I don't understand is the reaction of women towards men who have ever slept with prostitutes. It's pretty much a man's last resort/security. It's no different at all from a woman whose had a one night stand, if you want to get "moral" or even hygenic about it. Both are uniquely male and female acts of desperation when seeking company from the opposite sex and failing. Not every prostitute is some toothless granny meth head street walker either, the pictures my friend took when he was in Amsterdam were all of extremely attractive women that you'd have to be a millionaire to bag in America.

Posted
I couldn't care less what women who would never give me the time of day think about what i do in my spare time..

 

As a man with a high sex drive who cant attract women the only way my needs get met is through escorts..

 

Worry about your own life instead of judging others

 

 

Exactly.

 

Not to mention the type of guy women sleep with have as many sexual partners in a month as an escort. If your six packs chiseled enough or whatever, you can talk them into not using a condom as well, something you cant ever do with an escort.

 

If you wouldn't get with me, then you have absolutely no right to judge how I try to score. I understand there are some perverts and whore mongerers (some of them pay for it, but the ones who don't are underestimated) some women want to avoid, but all in all no man actively chooses to pay for sex, it's simply plan B to fulfill a basic physical need.

Posted
Exactly.

 

Not to mention the type of guy women sleep with have as many sexual partners in a month as an escort. If your six packs chiseled enough or whatever, you can talk them into not using a condom as well, something you cant ever do with an escort.

 

If you wouldn't get with me, then you have absolutely no right to judge how I try to score. I understand there are some perverts and whore mongerers (some of them pay for it, but the ones who don't are underestimated) some women want to avoid, but all in all no man actively chooses to pay for sex, it's simply plan B to fulfill a basic physical need.

 

Yeah at least you know a guys using a condom with an escort these top 5% of tall hot sucesful men have god knows how many encounters with these floozies without a condom yet women dont seem to mind that:rolleyes:

Posted
Yeah at least you know a guys using a condom with an escort these top 5% of tall hot sucesful men have god knows how many encounters with these floozies without a condom yet women dont seem to mind that:rolleyes:

 

 

Don't believe what you hear when they tell you it's about hygiene or morals. What grosses women out is status. The guy you describe whose slept with 300 women, is a winner from a female point of view, because being able to con a womans panties to the ground is a virtue and makes women feel liberated. Escorts on the other hand, omg , anyone can bang a hooker, even ugly guys/undesirables, ickyyy :sick:

 

Women on this forum will learn the hard way about what is dirtier when they go to bed with the typical guys above their league then find out a really sad fact about romance: Love doesn't last forever, but herpes does :D

Posted
Don't believe what you hear when they tell you it's about hygiene or morals. What grosses women out is status. The guy you describe whose slept with 300 women, is a winner from a female point of view, because being able to con a womans panties to the ground is a virtue and makes women feel liberated. Escorts on the other hand, omg , anyone can bang a hooker, even ugly guys/undesirables, ickyyy :sick:

 

Women on this forum will learn the hard way about what is dirtier when they go to bed with the typical guys above their league then find out a really sad fact about romance: Love doesn't last forever, but herpes does :D

 

Women always complain about the double standard of men and women being promiscious yet feed into it but praising guys with experience who do well with lots of women and bash unexperienced men who dont do well with women because they fear they wont know what to do in a rleationship or wont give them 10 orgasms as they lay on their back like a dead fish...

 

But i agree its all a front for the "staus" a male has or doesnt have that's important to women

Posted
I couldn't care less what women who would never give me the time of day think about what i do in my spare time..

 

As a man with a high sex drive who cant attract women the only way my needs get met is through escorts..

 

Worry about your own life instead of judging others

What about women who would be interested in you? Wouldn't you care what they think of you? Most, if not all, women would be repulsed if they knew you had been to prostitutes. Someday, you may meet that woman who is going to mean something to you. You really want that kind of history to bring to that relationship? I'm just suggesting that you guys consider the negative consequences, which far outweigh the positive ones. You risk getting an STD (and yes, most prostitutes use condoms, but most also have had at least one STD in their lifetime, some of which do not go away, and can be transmitted regardless of the use of a condom). You risk being arrested. (Lots of sting operations out there). You risk getting a negative police record, which could come back to bite you. You lose hundreds of dollars (most cost upwards of $100 per half hour). You contribute to the prostitute's damaging lifestyle, and probably her drug habit. You put money into the hands of criminals who do all kinds of nasty things. I could go on, but you get the picture. The negative outweighs the positive. And what is the positive? 1/2 hour of disconnected sex, devoid of emotion or feelings, with someone who thinks you're repulsive and can't wait for you to leave? Who only wants your money? Who thinks you're pathetic? Seriously. The negatives far outweigh any possible benefit.

Posted
What about women who would be interested in you? Wouldn't you care what they think of you? Most, if not all, women would be repulsed if they knew you had been to prostitutes. Someday, you may meet that woman who is going to mean something to you. You really want that kind of history to bring to that relationship? I'm just suggesting that you guys consider the negative consequences, which far outweigh the positive ones. You risk getting an STD (and yes, most prostitutes use condoms, but most also have had at least one STD in their lifetime, some of which do not go away, and can be transmitted regardless of the use of a condom). You risk being arrested. (Lots of sting operations out there). You risk getting a negative police record, which could come back to bite you. You lose hundreds of dollars (most cost upwards of $100 per half hour). You contribute to the prostitute's damaging lifestyle, and probably her drug habit. You put money into the hands of criminals who do all kinds of nasty things. I could go on, but you get the picture. The negative outweighs the positive. And what is the positive? 1/2 hour of disconnected sex, devoid of emotion or feelings, with someone who thinks you're repulsive and can't wait for you to leave? Who only wants your money? Who thinks you're pathetic? Seriously. The negatives far outweigh any possible benefit.

Have you ever had a one night stand?

Posted
What about women who would be interested in you? Wouldn't you care what they think of you? Most, if not all, women would be repulsed if they knew you had been to prostitutes. Someday, you may meet that woman who is going to mean something to you. You really want that kind of history to bring to that relationship? I'm just suggesting that you guys consider the negative consequences, which far outweigh the positive ones. You risk getting an STD (and yes, most prostitutes use condoms, but most also have had at least one STD in their lifetime, some of which do not go away, and can be transmitted regardless of the use of a condom). You risk being arrested. (Lots of sting operations out there). You risk getting a negative police record, which could come back to bite you. You lose hundreds of dollars (most cost upwards of $100 per half hour). You contribute to the prostitute's damaging lifestyle, and probably her drug habit. You put money into the hands of criminals who do all kinds of nasty things. I could go on, but you get the picture. The negative outweighs the positive. And what is the positive? 1/2 hour of disconnected sex, devoid of emotion or feelings, with someone who thinks you're repulsive and can't wait for you to leave? Who only wants your money? Who thinks you're pathetic? Seriously. The negatives far outweigh any possible benefit.

 

Im 31 and never been with a women except a friend of a friend who claimed she was drunk and was terrifed people would find out so chances are slim to none i meet a women interested in me..

 

Your thoughts on prostitution is so outdated and out of 70's pimp movies.. im not going to hunts point to get hookers who work for a pimp most of these women work indpendently now and you can meet online see her for a few hours and the deed is done..

Posted
Plenty of other people watch porn yet the same thing hasn't happened to them.

 

I have an idea of what it might be.

Watching too much porn does negatively affect brain chemistry. It also contributes to the problem of male impotence, since it programs your brain to be stimulated by those images instead of the real thing. It also lessens your ability to be adequately stimulated by real intercourse, since masturbation has a heavier touch, and so the penis is not stimulated enough by vaginal stimulation if it is used to the stimulation of masturbation. That's what the studies have shown. Too much porn viewing has a negative effect on your ability to perform, and a negative effect on your brain, and the attraction you feel towards real women.

Posted (edited)
What about women who would be interested in you? Wouldn't you care what they think of you? Most, if not all, women would be repulsed if they knew you had been to prostitutes. Someday, you may meet that woman who is going to mean something to you. You really want that kind of history to bring to that relationship? I'm just suggesting that you guys consider the negative consequences, which far outweigh the positive ones. You risk getting an STD (and yes, most prostitutes use condoms, but most also have had at least one STD in their lifetime, some of which do not go away, and can be transmitted regardless of the use of a condom). You risk being arrested. (Lots of sting operations out there). You risk getting a negative police record, which could come back to bite you. You lose hundreds of dollars (most cost upwards of $100 per half hour). You contribute to the prostitute's damaging lifestyle, and probably her drug habit. You put money into the hands of criminals who do all kinds of nasty things. I could go on, but you get the picture. The negative outweighs the positive. And what is the positive? 1/2 hour of disconnected sex, devoid of emotion or feelings, with someone who thinks you're repulsive and can't wait for you to leave? Who only wants your money? Who thinks you're pathetic? Seriously. The negatives far outweigh any possible benefit. [/Quote]

 

 

You are refusing to see the male point of view.

 

If I were to ask a typical girl for their sexual history, none of them would give me a straight answer. Why don't you detail to me your behavior KathyM? Are you a virgin ? If not , you have no right to judge. I think guys who have been with hookers like AD should throw them a little white lie, just like women do to us when we ask about their college years.

 

And LOL at your concept of a prostitutes life. Yes, street hookers you pick up in your car are on drugs and unfortunately have pimps, but that's the fault of people who keep it illegal and don't have a legitimate , government run system like in Europe where heroin addicts and pimps are not allowed to participate.

 

The one I tried to solicit had me meet her at her apartment in midtown manhattan , what a hard life she must be living :rolleyes: She is so hard up on money, that she actually told me to go away (she thought I had a "cop haircut" lol). It is indeed expensive (this broad was going for 200 per half hour) but I worked about 60 hours last week and got lots of overtime for the holidays, I thought I deserved to treat myself for once. And even then, because of the illegal nature of this, it still didn't happen. This society blows.

 

No man is going to choose the "emotionless" half an hour for money over a woman who genuinely loves them, but what about guys who have not seen a woman in what seems like a lifetime and see no light at the end of the tunnel? We still have needs, and something is always better than nothing.

 

I can see why a girl whose starved for male affection would have a one night stand, why can't you see the male version of that? Instead of wagging your finger at men with a strong dose of typical American evangelical hypocrisy, try to understand why people do what they do.

Edited by Wolf18
Posted
Watching too much porn does negatively affect brain chemistry. It also contributes to the problem of male impotence, since it programs your brain to be stimulated by those images instead of the real thing. It also lessens your ability to be adequately stimulated by real intercourse, since masturbation has a heavier touch, and so the penis is not stimulated enough by vaginal stimulation if it is used to the stimulation of masturbation. That's what the studies have shown. Too much porn viewing has a negative effect on your ability to perform, and a negative effect on your brain, and the attraction you feel towards real women.

Spoken like somebody who doesn't have a penis, or a clue.

Posted

I actually agree with Kathy about negative effects porn has on the mind, as well as warping sexual practices of people, this is true whether its gonzo crap or True Blood the porn for women.

 

Kathy however, doesn't really want men to breath. So Kathy is against the culture pushing for early marriage, is against porn, and is against prostitution. So WTF are men supposed to do? :rolleyes:

Posted
Well...I have no other choice. But fret not, this society is so lame and anti-male, that you can't even pay for it without having a billion connections or knowing people who know people etc :rolleyes:.

 

 

What I don't understand is the reaction of women towards men who have ever slept with prostitutes. It's pretty much a man's last resort/security. It's no different at all from a woman whose had a one night stand, if you want to get "moral" or even hygenic about it. Both are uniquely male and female acts of desperation when seeking company from the opposite sex and failing. Not every prostitute is some toothless granny meth head street walker either, the pictures my friend took when he was in Amsterdam were all of extremely attractive women that you'd have to be a millionaire to bag in America.

The reaction is because of the sheer volume of men that hookers have sex with, and put themselves and their customers at risk of contracting an STD. Also, the fact that a man would be so pathetic as to commercialize the act, it brings sex to such a low, that women can't get past that. The high risk and low standards create too big of a hurdle for women to want to deal with in a man. And don't kid yourself that just because the hooker is not walking the streets, that means she's not feeding a drug habit or a pimp. Of course it's different from a one night stand. A prostitute sees an average of 2 or 3 customers every night. That means 60 strangers a month, 720 strangers per year. If she were in the business for four years, that would mean a minimum of 2,880 partners in four years. Even the most permiscuous women who are not prostitutes would never come anywhere near those figures, with most people in the upper range of permiscuity reporting less than 30 total partners in a lifetime.

Posted
I actually agree with Kathy about negative effects porn has on the mind, as well as warping sexual practices of people, this is true whether its gonzo crap or True Blood the porn for women.

 

Kathy however, doesn't really want men to breath. So Kathy is against the culture pushing for early marriage, is against porn, and is against prostitution. So WTF are men supposed to do? :rolleyes:

Really, you agree with her that porn can cause impotence and can make men not be stimulated by real women?

 

Seriously?

Posted
Im 31 and never been with a women except a friend of a friend who claimed she was drunk and was terrifed people would find out so chances are slim to none i meet a women interested in me..

 

Your thoughts on prostitution is so outdated and out of 70's pimp movies.. im not going to hunts point to get hookers who work for a pimp most of these women work indpendently now and you can meet online see her for a few hours and the deed is done..

 

I get my information from recent articles and studies done. And don't kidd yourself in thinking that just because you see an advertisement online, that a woman is working independently and there is no pimp involved. A lot of times that is how the pimp operates his network, and it is often the pimp himself that is creating those ads and responding to customer emails and texts.

Posted

LOL at this thread.

 

The only thing I have to add is that females here would be SHOCKED at how many good looking, handsome suave dudes who generally don't have too much trouble getting women go to 'massage' parlors to 'let out a little steam'. It's not just the guys who can't get laid.

 

That's right ladies. There's a good chance your perfect little boyfriend has. And don't think he'll EVER admit it.

 

Don't ask how I know...

Posted
Have you ever had a one night stand?

My sexual history is not the topic of discussion here. ;) The negative effects of prostitution is the topic of discussion, and the pros and cons of going to one.

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