ZimboGon Posted December 27, 2011 Posted December 27, 2011 Its a strange question. My ex and i broke up about 6 weeks ago, and i'm almost certain to expect her back after everything we went through and how we broke up. She left me for another guy. I just have some questions about my observations. We were together a long time, and she was always happy with me until recent events that happened to both of us. I mean, the relationship she has with the guy she left me for isn't doing so great at the moment. It seems like they never see each other, nor does she have the desire to see him. Everyone says she doesn't seem happy with him. So, in that aspect she isn't happy. On the other hand, she is making friends. Something she always had trouble doing, and she's going out with friends for the first time in a long while. I ran into her the other day, and she tried hard to avoid me. It could be the guilt of what she did to me, or it could be that she still cares and its too hard for her to face me... Or maybe its because she just doesn't care about me anymore? We exchanged Merry Christmases the other day to my surprise. So, i was talking to some friends about it. Most of them were like, "We know her, and from how it sounds she seems conflicted, confused, and she's going to come back." But one of my friends looked at me and just said, "She's over you. She doesn't give a sh*t about you anymore, its obvious by the way she is acting." So, it made me think. Doesn't she have to get over me before she wants to get back together? Over time she starts to miss me and what we had and how i treated her, and she returns? Or does that shadow of regret just hold over her the entire time?
appletini Posted December 27, 2011 Posted December 27, 2011 Wanted to show you some thread love in return. I don't believe that if you are truly over someone, you'll go back to them or miss them... I'm just thinking of some exes in the past where, regardless of whether or not we stayed friends, that door was closed for good. There was no "conflict"; it was just over. Maybe what you're waiting for instead is for her to cycle through the honeymoon stage with this new guy, realize the grass isn't greener, etc. and come back to you. So that wouldn't really be her getting over you as much as her being in denial, and then coming out of that denial.
shook187 Posted December 27, 2011 Posted December 27, 2011 My ex returned after 2 months, it would've been sooner hadn't I of been begging her for weeks. dude everyone on this site is always looking for advice that simply isn't there, even me. so i'm going to tell you to continue being you, find yourself, strengthen yourself, and heal up. because what will be WILL be. and nothing you can say or do will change that. time is a funny thing, and if she wants to rekindle she will. how can you just forgive this girl? you know once you get back together you will resent her and probably just turn your love into anger because of what she has done to you. have we all lost our morals? learn from my mistake. if they leave once, they will leave again. my story being an exception. I left her because I couldn't forgive her for just walking out on me after 6 years. but hey, in another few months, maybe years, maybe i can forget this and maybe you can too.
Author ZimboGon Posted December 27, 2011 Author Posted December 27, 2011 Wanted to show you some thread love in return. I don't believe that if you are truly over someone, you'll go back to them or miss them... I'm just thinking of some exes in the past where, regardless of whether or not we stayed friends, that door was closed for good. There was no "conflict"; it was just over. Maybe what you're waiting for instead is for her to cycle through the honeymoon stage with this new guy, realize the grass isn't greener, etc. and come back to you. So that wouldn't really be her getting over you as much as her being in denial, and then coming out of that denial. Yeah, pretty much. I've put a lot of threads out there about it, but long story short we had a great loving relationship but distance got in the way and another guy moved in. She got caught in the chase with him and she ended up stringing us both along until i forced her to choose. She just loved me so much, and i loved her too. Our relationship just needed a little work after 16 months, but instead she jumped ship to someone everyone knows won't make her happy. I'm just waiting for that honeymoon phase she is in to end and for her to crash, because i'll be waiting with open arms. She's young and immature, and i understand what she is going through. I'm confident that it will happen. EDIT: and i know i won't resent her. We had some pretty powerful moments together, and we are all human. We make mistakes, and second chances do happen. I don't hold in anger, and i know she is loyal. This isn't something that will happen again. It was love, and love is enough for me to wait for her.
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