Marianis Posted December 26, 2011 Posted December 26, 2011 I just wanted to say this... just to get it off my chest … I do miss my ex terribly and I don’t know if I miss what we had or just him or what he made me feel I guess I miss everything and the fact that he doesn’t seem to miss me it´s horrible. I´ve been just thinking if he felt the same way as me… we were in a LDR… so I don’t know if he even miss me a little since he has a gf in his country… I think about him all the time still and I went to Cancun and every guy I saw remind me of him. I used to have a “friend with benefits” it lasted for like maybe 4 months but like a week ago I told him I didn’t want to do it anymore because we were at the point of deciding if we were together a 100% or nothing. I thought it was the best because I can´t seem to be able to love again and that sucks and I find myself waiting for my ex still missing him and wanting to know about him all the time… i´m really sick of it and we broke up in February and been in NC since the end of June… sooo… I cant find the way out of it ….. :'( and im really mad at myself because i cant just let him go completly. HELP!
Philosoraptor Posted December 26, 2011 Posted December 26, 2011 What have you been doing for yourself? Have you made yourself the priority and started to make your dreams come true? Once you learn to take care of yourself and love yourself the most things will start to fall in place for you.
Author Marianis Posted December 26, 2011 Author Posted December 26, 2011 The thing is.. that I don’t know what i want exactly or if what I think I want I want it for the right reasons... For example... I decided i want to go live in another contry... i´m thinking Canada.. but at the same time i dont know why i want to do that! ... I feel I will have a better life there than here in Mexico, but also … my ex is there … and I feel here I won’t find the person for me either… :S … I seriously don’t like Mexican guys… in order to live somewhere else.. I need to wait at least a year.. so I can save money… get experience… my titulation test and do all the paper work… I think it will be really difficult … and if I´m not sure of the reasons I don’t know if I will really do it… How can I know what I really want?! .. and if they are the right reasons!?!? :S its hard! the dreams i had were with him :S maybe that is the real problem
Rorschach64 Posted December 27, 2011 Posted December 27, 2011 You are worried, too worried infact, about securing another person as a lover. You are basing all your decisions on it. You need to still stay single and work on your education then everything will fall in to place and also try being alone for awhile. Believe me Maria, I know how you feel with the LDR and NC. Coming on 7 months NC and it makes you wonder a lot, especially without getting any breadcrumbs.
Author Marianis Posted December 28, 2011 Author Posted December 28, 2011 Dear Rorschach64, im a girl that dreams all the time about finding someone special! ... i think that if i dont then i wont be completly happy... since now i want to be alone .. i haven´t talk to my friend at all even if he has sent me texts and stuff.. i guess it´s the best because i know i have to be happy with the things i do and all.. my sister told me my happiness is up to me not up to someone else... but it´s hard to stop believing that... i´m worried yes! i don´t want to be the crazy lonely lady with cats... and I care a lot about my age.. the funny thing is that i´m just 23… :S My ex sent my an email by the way.. he just said congrats for my graduation party and thats it.. thats not breacrums .. right?! .. i sent something back but he never answer! .. so ya thats it! .. Have you got anything from her since the last post?! … do you still care?! ... how have you been?!
Rorschach64 Posted December 28, 2011 Posted December 28, 2011 Maria, Of course everyone would love to find that someone special to share the rest of their life with! You're sister is right, happiness should come from within yourself and not be dependable on someone else for it because people are fickle, they can just up and leave for no good reason then you're miserable. You shouldn't worry about such things, especially at your age, because when you aren't looking things will just click with the right person and you won't know what happened to have found such a great person. Oh and nothing wrong with cats! They stupid-funny-awesome! Well that e-mail could him just being polite or nice and him not responding to whatever you sent him is pretty good indication you aren't on his list of concerns. How long ago was this? What did you even say to him? I haven't heard from her after almost 7 months, minus her requesting an address so she can send my laptop and dog tags back, which she didn't. I still care, unfortunately, the urge to contact her has rerisen due to holidays and the fact her friend sent me a merry christmas and check in on me was bothersome. Other than that, just trying to find a job in NYC .... maybe with the NYPD
Author Marianis Posted December 28, 2011 Author Posted December 28, 2011 he send this: hey, just wanted to congratulate you on finishing school and graduating!!! I'm really happy for you!! If I remember right your party is this coming weekend. If it already past, I hope you had fun!! But i think it's this weekend!! I hope things are good with you and your family!! Hope you have a great end to your week and good luck with everything. And i mean i like it but i got it on my 2 different email accounts! :S one i have in my blackberry so i saw it when i was having a great time with a friend .. so my emotions changed in that exact moment.. i was literary shaking! :S my answer: hello, you're right! my grad party is on saturday so im really looking forward to that .. thanks for the congrats and i want to take this chance to congratulate you to... you finally got your ring! ... so thats great!! .. i hope you had a great time and that more awesome achievements come to you. Everything is good here my grandma just had her 89 bday .. so its awesome and im on vacations until the 23rd so i have time to just go out, relax and study for my titulation test ... Hope everything is good with you too and also with your lovely fam! .. PS: ill send you a pic of my grad party if you send me a pic of your iron ring ceremony! ... just saying!! hahaha Buenas Noches!! Did i say something wrong?! or what?! .. haha because its been almost a month and no answer no nothing! :S and i guess is better that way but like you i still care a lot! and i think is crazy because i went through this before and it wasnt that bad! :S its been a long time and its driving me crazy i guess im getting used to being this way.. buu it sucks hahaha anyway.. when your ex realize what she lost you wont even care about her anymore .. right?! ... good luck to you getting that job!! you can do it! PS: I dont like cats!! .. hahaha
TheDovic Posted December 28, 2011 Posted December 28, 2011 Hey chick, I know it's hard, especially at this time of the year, but I think we both just need time and not to expect too much from ourselves! U know me and my ex have been apart almost 6 months now, and you know how I've been feeling too, but I've decided all people heal in different time scales, so don't put too much pressure on yourself! Hope Cancun was fun, Love Dovic x
Author Marianis Posted December 29, 2011 Author Posted December 29, 2011 Hey guy! Cancun was great .. i didnt want to come back!! hahaha .. I felt you were scolding me .. (new word for me) haha no no no eh! your comming for a new year party in mex?!
Rorschach64 Posted December 30, 2011 Posted December 30, 2011 Maria, Well from what he said to what you responded, I would venture to say he is just showing some concern with your life, just a check up, and nothing much else. Maybe guilt thing too...maybe aliens are invading...you really can't know for sure. Your response was pretty decent I thought. Just talking about your life, so I don't think you said anything wrong. I am sure you have heard the power struggle/ball in the person's court thing before, but by answering him you leave the ball in his court and keeps you wondering plus driving you nuts. If he contacts you next time, don't respond for at least awhile...think on it. P.S. Cats are great cause they're really stupid pets....look up "I'm a stupid cat" on youtube...funny stuff!
TheDovic Posted December 30, 2011 Posted December 30, 2011 Ha ha, if I had the money lol... I didn't read all of your replies and didn't know he'd emailed you. That must have really messed with your head. Are you ok?
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