makelemonade1974 Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 Anyone ever experienced this? There seem to be a few people on every discussion board I've ever visited that seem to be hell-bent on getting a reaction out of you. Do you think it's ethical to speak to someone in a manner that would be deemed inappropriate in "real life"? How do you deal with these people? It's seems a sad phenomenon, particularly around the holidays.
Gold Pile Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 Sometimes the mean ones bug me, but ya can't let them get to you
kaylan Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 Anonymity allows real life cowards to become internet big mouths/tough guys.
ShannonMI Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 Anyone ever experienced this? There seem to be a few people on every discussion board I've ever visited that seem to be hell-bent on getting a reaction out of you. Do you think it's ethical to speak to someone in a manner that would be deemed inappropriate in "real life"? How do you deal with these people? It's seems a sad phenomenon, particularly around the holidays. There was one resident troll here on LS that harassed the living hell out of me everyday for like 3 weeks. He'd get banned and then come back with a different user name. Every thread I posted on, he would post after me and call me names and just say rotten things. Even made threads all about me and what an ugly whore, how I sucked my dog's dick etc, etc. Needless to say, the guy was obsessed with me and the only way he could express his admiration was by calling me names. True story. I would laugh it off. Things like that don't bother me because the guy was transparent as hell. He was a sad, pathetic human being who probably lived with his mommy and who had never even kissed a girl. He hasn't been on in weeks (knock on wood). He's probably hanging from his shower rod right now as we speak. The type of people that troll and say mean things to others are doing so to make themselves feel better because they are MISERABLE. Just remember that. Don't ever let what they say, get to you. I don't. I honestly feel bad for people like that. They have major issues. They aren't doing what they do just for sh*ts and giggles. They have deep seeded problems. It's very sad.
Author makelemonade1974 Posted December 23, 2011 Author Posted December 23, 2011 Shannon - WOW I'm sorry you had to go through that. I have one in particular that also seems to be following me around, although she's not that bad. Not sure why she has chosen me in particular. I do think it's due to their own unhappiness, which is a shame. I can't imagine feeling better by making someone else feel bad. That's pretty messed up.
lululucy Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 There was one resident troll here on LS that harassed the living hell out of me everyday for like 3 weeks. He'd get banned and then come back with a different user name. Every thread I posted on, he would post after me and call me names and just say rotten things. Even made threads all about me and what an ugly whore, how I sucked my dog's dick etc, etc. Needless to say, the guy was obsessed with me and the only way he could express his admiration was by calling me names. True story. I would laugh it off. Things like that don't bother me because the guy was transparent as hell. He was a sad, pathetic human being who probably lived with his mommy and who had never even kissed a girl. He hasn't been on in weeks (knock on wood). He's probably hanging from his shower rod right now as we speak. The type of people that troll and say mean things to others are doing so to make themselves feel better because they are MISERABLE. Just remember that. Don't ever let what they say, get to you. I don't. I honestly feel bad for people like that. They have major issues. They aren't doing what they do just for sh*ts and giggles. They have deep seeded problems. It's very sad. Wowza I am pretty glad I've missed that train. I was going to say that a lot of the people I think are being mean are just being blunt and the internet kind of takes away the interpretation -- just as texting tends to leave things open to interpretation. I read over some of the threads that I'd posted in the past with my ex on here and I remember at the time being INFURIATED by the replies I got. Re-reading now, I can see their point and 85% of them are right. I was just too close to the situation to get a clear view of it. If only I could've listened at the time, I would've saved myself a lot of heartache. But if there are trolls like Shan's got, then hell, ignore me. That block button has come in useful.
ShannonMI Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 Shannon - WOW I'm sorry you had to go through that. I have one in particular that also seems to be following me around, although she's not that bad. Not sure why she has chosen me in particular. I do think it's due to their own unhappiness, which is a shame. I can't imagine feeling better by making someone else feel bad. That's pretty messed up. It is messed up but that is why they do it. And to get a rise out of you is what they really want. A few times I lashed back at the troll, but finally I just started putting him on ignore. The minute I realized it was him, I would immediately do it. I couldn't read any of his posts. Eventually he quit posting and he hasn't been on in weeks. Thank God because it was getting to be annoying. I didn't care what the dude said about me, but it was just irritating to have to weed through the stupid posts to read the good ones. Oh well. He's gone now. Hope I don't jinx myself by saying it hahahahahahahaha:laugh:
Author makelemonade1974 Posted December 23, 2011 Author Posted December 23, 2011 yeah, lulu - I get the blunt thing. But when it's complete distortion of things just to be nasty, that's a problem. When I went through a breakup last year I dealt with the same sort of thing. Sometimes you need a little tough love. Block button? I will have to find this thing.
Casablanca Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 Just ignore them. Take satisfaction that they have nothing better to do in their life than to try and make people feel bad. I'd hate to have that existence where I'm so empty and down that I have to try and bring people down
TheFinalWord Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 There was one resident troll here on LS that harassed the living hell out of me everyday for like 3 weeks. He'd get banned and then come back with a different user name. Every thread I posted on, he would post after me and call me names and just say rotten things. Even made threads all about me and what an ugly whore, how I sucked my dog's dick etc, etc. Needless to say, the guy was obsessed with me and the only way he could express his admiration was by calling me names. True story. I would laugh it off. Things like that don't bother me because the guy was transparent as hell. He was a sad, pathetic human being who probably lived with his mommy and who had never even kissed a girl. He hasn't been on in weeks (knock on wood). He's probably hanging from his shower rod right now as we speak. The type of people that troll and say mean things to others are doing so to make themselves feel better because they are MISERABLE. Just remember that. Don't ever let what they say, get to you. I don't. I honestly feel bad for people like that. They have major issues. They aren't doing what they do just for sh*ts and giggles. They have deep seeded problems. It's very sad. Wow, that's terrible! What a scumbag.
ShannonMI Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 Wow, that's terrible! What a scumbag. Yeah the guy was pathetic. It was sad really. He spent A LOT of time on here harassing me and others. Someone that spends HOURS a day on an internet forum harrassing people is a L.O.S.E.R. with no life.
Eddie Edirol Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 I just started putting him on ignore. The minute I realized it was him, I would immediately do it. I couldn't read any of his posts. Eventually he quit posting and he hasn't been on in weeks. This is how it works Lemonade. You just put them on ignore, and no matter what they say, they cant get that rise out of you, then they go away. The problem is, some people are too proud to ignore them. Thats the part I dont get.
phineas Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 I found a phone booth & turned into captain save-a-ho. Or so I was told when I out trolled the troll. Not that shannon needed saving. He wasn't very bright & it wasn't very hard. Hell, I flamed myself better than he could flame me & gave him some pointers. he didn't want to be friends anymore with me.
Eddie Edirol Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 I found a phone booth & turned into captain save-a-ho. Or so I was told when I out trolled the troll. Not that shannon needed saving. He wasn't very bright & it wasn't very hard. Hell, I flamed myself better than he could flame me & gave him some pointers. he didn't want to be friends anymore with me. Can you link the thread where you out trolled the troll? Im mad I missed that.
El Brujo Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 Anyone ever experienced this? There seem to be a few people on every discussion board I've ever visited that seem to be hell-bent on getting a reaction out of you. Do you think it's ethical to speak to someone in a manner that would be deemed inappropriate in "real life"? How do you deal with these people? Invite 'em to a meetup. Scares the crap out of 'em every time. They won't dare show up because they're afraid of getting their lights punched out.
phineas Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 Can you link the thread where you out trolled the troll? Im mad I missed that. It was deleted along with all the other's. That dude made like 30 troll threads in one week I think.
CocoaBrown Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 Anyone ever experienced this? There seem to be a few people on every discussion board I've ever visited that seem to be hell-bent on getting a reaction out of you. Do you think it's ethical to speak to someone in a manner that would be deemed inappropriate in "real life"? How do you deal with these people? It's seems a sad phenomenon, particularly around the holidays. Yes I have noticed it. I notice it alot here too. I don't get it. I really try to address people on here the same way I address people in real life. That's someones mom, dad, sister, uncle, etc. Now don't get me wrong I can be a bitch, but you have to start with me first. I try to ignore rude people. I generally block them and/or don't respond to their posts or anything they say to me. I don't have time for the bull****. I get online to relax and don't need or want the drama. I think people tend to feel like they can say anything they want because no one knows who they are or they think what's online isn't "real". I also think they are very unhappy in their "real" lives and feel like they have some type of power online. But these people couldn't do what they do if they were ignored. Don't go back and forth with them and they won't have anything to "live" off of. I know for a FACT if they ever saw me face to face they would have nothing to say so although it's hard to do sometimes I just let it go.
Surrealist Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 (edited) This is one of the reasons I left this place about a year ago. I also know a lady who was an active member on here who is now a facebook friend, she would get hammered on here for various reasons as to why she couldn't find a bf. She ended up finding a bf and left this place too, and she is still happily with the guy about a year later. I am really happy for her and I hope it remains a life-long relationship for her. But anyway, this forum can do a lot of damage moreso than help, is quite toxic to one's self-esteem if you take to heart the ill-spirited posts, often disguised as 'advice'. I'm not talking about constructive criticism which may be warranted, but the so called 'advice' from someone who is bitter, angry or otherwise miserable themselves, seeking to inflict similar pain on other vulnerable people. Personally I thought a long absence from this and any similar environment was needed and so glad I did. Edited December 24, 2011 by Surrealist spelling
carhill Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 (edited) Invite 'em to a meetup. Scares the crap out of 'em every time. They won't dare show up because they're afraid of getting their lights punched out. Yep, I'm easy to find IRL and have no problem seeing how it goes. Who knows, they might be a winner. If not, the back 40 is spacious and there's plenty of diesel in the tractor. . People, no problem. Edited December 24, 2011 by carhill
El Brujo Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 Trolls themselves may not know it but they're easy to spot offline. Those smartass grins give them away every time.
johan Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 Posts that fall within the guidelines but express a point of view you don't appreciate should just be ignored if you aren't interested in what they have to say. Posts that are not compliant with the guidelines or the spirit of the site should be reported. If it is a post you wish the moderators would do something about, report it. I used to never report anything, but the recent invasion of trouble makers and seeing how bad discourse was getting in general made me think it's important in order to get the site operating back up to standard. People I like were starting to leave, and it wasn't a fun place anymore. The moderators can't patrol the site themselves. There needs to be a "neighborhood watch".
ShannonMI Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 I found a phone booth & turned into captain save-a-ho. Or so I was told when I out trolled the troll. Not that shannon needed saving. He wasn't very bright & it wasn't very hard. Hell, I flamed myself better than he could flame me & gave him some pointers. he didn't want to be friends anymore with me. Not to burst your Caption Save-A-Ho bubble, but I think the reason the troll FINALLY left was the fact that I started to put him on ignore and posted that I was. He knew I couldn't read anything he wrote, so he just quit. What was the point if I couldn't see what he was posting about me? Before that, he would post some outrageous garbage and I would reply to him. He would eat it up. When I couldn't read his sh*t and when I stopped answering him, he grew tired of it. As anyone would when they are getting ignored. That was the reason he finally left LS. But thank you for trying to get the douchebag to leave. I appreciate it. A lot of fellow LS'rs came to my defense during the whole debacle and I thought that was very sweet of them.
Mme. Chaucer Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 Shannon, I think your special troll left because LS has some kickass new software and tougher moderation lately. It's been so much better. I haven't seen a troll in many days. OP - I've noticed that when someone (and it's been me, once or twice) posts advice to you that you don't like or don't think is "nice," you lash out with zesty rudeness. If you're concerned with "kindness," check yourself first. We are inviting diverse input and opinions on our situations when we post here. If we are going to post here, we really need to be prepared to hear stuff that is not what we want to hear. Sometimes what we need to hear or to face is not the same thing as what is going to make us feel better. I am pretty reliable here to go to the personal responsibility / accountability place; suggesting that one look at themselves and their own behavior deeply way before turning it all on others. That is not very popular. It's what I've needed, so it's what I offer. Take what you like, and leave the rest.
phineas Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 Not to burst your Caption Save-A-Ho bubble, but I think the reason the troll FINALLY left was the fact that I started to put him on ignore and posted that I was. He knew I couldn't read anything he wrote, so he just quit. What was the point if I couldn't see what he was posting about me? Before that, he would post some outrageous garbage and I would reply to him. He would eat it up. When I couldn't read his sh*t and when I stopped answering him, he grew tired of it. As anyone would when they are getting ignored. That was the reason he finally left LS. But thank you for trying to get the douchebag to leave. I appreciate it. A lot of fellow LS'rs came to my defense during the whole debacle and I thought that was very sweet of them. I know I didn't scare him away. he was hit with the ban hammer. hard. LOL He just didn't want to play with me
ShannonMI Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 Shannon, I think your special troll left because LS has some kickass new software and tougher moderation lately. It's been so much better. I haven't seen a troll in many days. OP - I've noticed that when someone (and it's been me, once or twice) posts advice to you that you don't like or don't think is "nice," you lash out with zesty rudeness. If you're concerned with "kindness," check yourself first. We are inviting diverse input and opinions on our situations when we post here. If we are going to post here, we really need to be prepared to hear stuff that is not what we want to hear. Sometimes what we need to hear or to face is not the same thing as what is going to make us feel better. I am pretty reliable here to go to the personal responsibility / accountability place; suggesting that one look at themselves and their own behavior deeply way before turning it all on others. That is not very popular. It's what I've needed, so it's what I offer. Take what you like, and leave the rest. New software? Wow good!! I'm happy to hear that. It was out of control and I'm glad to know they finally sprung for some software that would kill the trolls. Yes hearing things we don't want to hear can bother us, but sometimes constructive criticism is good for a person. Even if it really stings. I've dealt with that at times on LS and while it can bother me, I don't consider it trolling. I just take it for what it is and that's it. Sometimes even the harshest answers are helpful and make you think more deeply about things. Hopefully OP can take that type of criticism for what its worth.
Recommended Posts