Melrapuo Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 Asked my friend tonight to txt my ex so he can ge my stuff from her for me. She said she'd be out of work at some point tomorrow and he can pick it up then. I feel like an ass. I expected her to suddenly want me back or something? It hit home again that this is over. I tried all day to just accept that it would just be a pick up and that's it. Why would I assume something magical would come out of it? Like a change of heart? How the hell would that happen? Sorry, just venting.
swann Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 I'm sorry for your pain, I really know how it feels. Basically the same happened to me (she was the one picking up her stuff). And yes, that's when you realise that it's really over; the pain is overwhelming. However, that's probably the first big turning point of the healing process. Now you know that she won't be back, you can start focus on your life without her. If she had given you false hopes it would have been a lot worse. Try to stay strong, you'll feel a (little) better very soon.
Author Melrapuo Posted December 23, 2011 Author Posted December 23, 2011 How long have you been apart? Its been one week.
Author Melrapuo Posted December 23, 2011 Author Posted December 23, 2011 So I got more info from my friend. He said that she said today was fine, that she would call when he can come. He asked how she was doing, and she said she's hanging in there, asked how I was. Her told her that I was hanging in there, and that things will just take time. He also said I'd be fine, and she said "I hope so." She asked about the iPhone that she had ordered for me, and he told her I cancelled it already. he tried to joke around with her, and she wasn't really having it (this is all thru text, btw). It's nice to know she's not going through this well, either. I guess there's some comfort in that.
mike588 Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 Its been one week. Don't abandon the ship yet....it's only been a week.Get your stuff and go strict N.C.....with it only being a week anything can happen.
Author Melrapuo Posted December 23, 2011 Author Posted December 23, 2011 Don't abandon the ship yet....it's only been a week.Get your stuff and go strict N.C.....with it only being a week anything can happen. When I went through my first break up from a LTR (almost two years), I clung to hope with tooth and nail hoping for reconciliation (that ex had left me for someone else.) This time around, its different. However, I don't want to fool myself. We're not together right now, and I don't want to torture myself with misleading assumptions.
mike588 Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 When I went through my first break up from a LTR (almost two years), I clung to hope with tooth and nail hoping for reconciliation (that ex had left me for someone else.) This time around, its different. However, I don't want to fool myself. We're not together right now, and I don't want to torture myself with misleading assumptions. Yeah for your own good don't get your hopes up....move on..stay in N.C. just because your last ex. did'nt come back doesn't mean this one won't. I'm sure you've read here about No Contact.....follow it...don't bug her by texting...calling...and coming across that your a wreck without her...begging..pleading...you'll look weak and pathetic...thats's a turnoff!!
Author Melrapuo Posted December 23, 2011 Author Posted December 23, 2011 (edited) Yeah for your own good don't get your hopes up....move on..stay in N.C. just because your last ex. did'nt come back doesn't mean this one won't. I'm sure you've read here about No Contact.....follow it...don't bug her by texting...calling...and coming across that your a wreck without her...begging..pleading...you'll look weak and pathetic...thats's a turnoff!! Yea, this isn't my first rodeo . I did that with my last ex...not going to happen this time. I haven't had the urge to call or text at all, really. I know what the possible disappointment would feel like. Doesn't stop me from checking my phone every now and then though...lol. Funny, when I posted this thread initially I was very upset. Five minutes later, I asked myself "well what did you expect her to say, really?" and realized I'm just getting myself worked up for no reason. Edited December 23, 2011 by Melrapuo
Author Melrapuo Posted December 23, 2011 Author Posted December 23, 2011 Well the time came and went...she said she would call my friend to let him know when she was home, never did. My friend n I left town to go party. Sigh...kinda annoyed, but ill have him call her tomorrow or monday. Just wanted to get this over with.
mike588 Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 I think we all wanted our ex. back at some time....I did early on but after 4 months now I seriously doubt if she'll even attempt to. Since my ex. went back to her ex. and she told me that they never offically broke up....... well he can have her.
Author Melrapuo Posted December 24, 2011 Author Posted December 24, 2011 I just feel like **** right now. I know that despite my best attempts I keep hoping for the best. Maybe a christmas miracle lol...I'm just being stupid. She's moving on. I'm trying to go out every day and make myself better, but its not working. I hate hope. It just makes me feel worse.
mike588 Posted December 24, 2011 Posted December 24, 2011 I just feel like **** right now. I know that despite my best attempts I keep hoping for the best. Maybe a christmas miracle lol...I'm just being stupid. She's moving on. I'm trying to go out every day and make myself better, but its not working. I hate hope. It just makes me feel worse. I was sorta hoping for a Merry X-mas email but that ain't gonna happen...it's for the best though....if I got one it would just stir up all those emotions again....No Thanks.
Author Melrapuo Posted December 24, 2011 Author Posted December 24, 2011 Still don't think its time to abandon ship? At this point I feel like I should scuttle the **** out of it lol
Author Melrapuo Posted December 24, 2011 Author Posted December 24, 2011 I'm having a hard time facing reality at the moment. Still haven't contacted her since the break up. (and she hasn't contacted me, either.) Is there a time frame that I should give during NC before I started to force myself and fully accept that this relationship will never reconcile? I know everyone here has advice, and probably more experience than I have (I've been in 2 relationships in my life, one for two years and this last one for three). But is everything so black and white? Would anyone here, or anywhere for that matter, really be able to tell me whats going to happen in the future, in terms of this relationship? Am I reaching? Or am I just lying to myself...
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