White Women = Status?

[counterman]

If I were to date an asian woman who hated men of her own culture it would be a huge turn off. That to me is a sign of self hatred. I once dated a black woman who just trashed black men left and right and it complete put me off. She sounded like she could have joined a hate group. A person should not hate their own heritage. Nothing wrong with dating others but have some respect for yourself.

 

I've heard a few Asian girls trash about Asian men; it was disgusting. It sounded like it came from a place of deep hatred. It was so foul and so repulsive. The things that they said, it just makes me shake my head and think where did it all go so wrong.

[kaylan]

Based on people I actually know and thing I've obseved over the last 40+ years, I only know 2 white men who have chosen to settle down with black women. I don't ever see this type of coupling when I'm out and about shopping or socializing.

 

However, I do see alot more of the black man/white woman scenario, but it seems the white woman they're with is always overweight. 99% of the time, it's an overweight and not very attractive white woman. I'm kind of stumped on that.

 

Just what I've observed.

Travel to NYC. Plenty of brothers dating attractive white women.

 

I think confirmation bias perpetuates the stereotype that black men date unattractive white women. Basically that more people overlook the attractive couples and notice the unattractive couples more often because it confirms their already formed opinion.

 

Plus a lot of times I notice haters sling that stereotype at good brothers who date white women out of jealousy. When I dated my ex I could feel the jealousy coming off some dudes faces. She even had an old classmate openly tell her he doesnt accept it and that it didnt make sense to him. Got all upset for no reason.

[kaylan]

If I were to date an asian woman who hated men of her own culture it would be a huge turn off. That to me is a sign of self hatred. I once dated a black woman who just trashed black men left and right and it complete put me off. She sounded like she could have joined a hate group. A person should not hate their own heritage. Nothing wrong with dating others but have some respect for yourself.

I actually was really turned off by an Asian chick I dated this summer because of this reason. It was def a strike against her for me not to date her exclusively.

 

It was funny because she was adopted and raised by a white family since grade school age, yet had a thing for black guys and black culture. She preferred my race, but refused to consider Asian guys, and gave white guys a little bit of a chance even though she was raised in that culture.

 

From now on I refuse to date a girl who doesnt like her own men, and I also refuse to date women who have a strong racial preference for any race either. Ive had enough girls try to experiment with me to know Id rather have a girl like me because Im a great guy, not because Im a black guy.

 

I dont enjoy anyone who fetishizes me or anyone else. Out of every single non black girl Ive been with sexually, I have been the first black guy she was with, with the exception of one girl.

 

That says a few things to me: that I may be kinda cool and good at breaking down a girls barriers on dating outside of her race...or that she may be experimenting me with and had no serious intentions to date me...which has happened to me before and sucks....or hopefully two people just clicked and race never came into the equation. I prefer the last reason.

Edited December 23, 2011 by kaylan

[PlumPrincess]

Actually, not every asian has "single eyelids" so many times asians who get the "double eyelid" surgery, are just trying to look like other asians.

You're really naive if you think they just do it, because they want to look like other Asians who happen to have this double eyelid.

 

But your response is another example of people being so quick to pin minorities are "trying to be white" or "wanting to be white" before actually researching this stuff.

But you did the research? And very thoroughly?

[kaylan]

You're really naive if you think they just do it, because they want to look like other Asians who happen to have this double eyelid.

Im naive? lmao...not at all. If anything you have a lot of gall to think you can speak for them and their reasons for the surgery. Doctors who do the surgery even say that many of their patients reasoning is to have the eyelids of other Asians. Its a feature they value, so let them have their reasons.

 

Double eyelids are NOT exclusive to whites. Everyone has them. Im sure there may exist Asians who do it for the wrong reason, but you cannot speak for them. Youre like the people in the video I posted before who think anime is white. Everything isnt about white people. You cant assume features that Asians find attractive as them "trying to be white" especially when east asians are fair skinned themselves and many have double eyelids.

 

But you did the research? And very thoroughly?

Yes I have. I have looked at this issue for years because racial issues are interesting to me. Its not as simple as trying to make an assumption about the reasons for why Asians get this surgery done because the feature they are trying to create is not typical to only white. And its not atypical of Asians.

 

Its not a study, but check this forum out. http://asianfanatics.net/forum/topic/121850-you-have-single-eyelid-or-double-eyelid/

 

Thats an East Asian form and the majority of respondents have double eyelid.

 

So like I was saying, because the feature exists in Asians, we cannot jump to the conclusion and say they are trying to look white. Noone says white women are trying to be black when they tan and get implants to make themselves curvier. Yes Eurocentric ideals exist in the world, but sometimes I feel like white people feel so self important as to paint a lot of things minorities do as "trying to be white"

 

Like when Ive been told I "act white" for a black guy because I listen to rock music and watch soccer despite the facts that blacks pioneered rock music and soccer is the worlds most popular sport...let alone the most popular in Africa.

Edited December 23, 2011 by kaylan

[PlumPrincess]

Im naive? lmao...not at all. If anything you have a lot of gall to think you can speak for them and their reasons for the surgery. Doctors who do the surgery even say that many of their patients reasoning is to have the eyelids of other Asians. Its a feature they value, so let them have their reasons.

 

Double eyelids are NOT exclusive to whites. Everyone has them. Im sure there may exist Asians who do it for the wrong reason, but you cannot speak for them. Youre like the people in the video I posted before who think anime is white. Everything isnt about white people. You cant assume features that Asians find attractive as them "trying to be white" especially when east asians are fair skinned themselves and many have double eyelids.

 

 

Yes I have. I have looked at this issue for years because racial issues are interesting to me. Its not as simple as trying to make an assumption about the reasons for why Asians get this surgery done because the feature they are trying to create is not typical to only white. And its not atypical of Asians.

 

Its not a study, but check this forum out. http://asianfanatics.net/forum/topic/121850-you-have-single-eyelid-or-double-eyelid/

 

Thats an East Asian form and the majority of respondents have double eyelid.

 

So like I was saying, because the feature exists in Asians, we cannot jump to the conclusion and say they are trying to look white. Noone says white women are trying to be black when they tan and get implants to make themselves curvier. Yes Eurocentric ideals exist in the world, but sometimes I feel like white people feel so self important as to paint a lot of things minorities do as "trying to be white"

 

Like when Ive been told I "act white" for a black guy because I listen to rock music and watch soccer despite the facts that blacks pioneered rock music and soccer is the worlds most popular sport...let alone the most popular in Africa.

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,332097,00.html

[phineas]

Well, then go after the ethnic women. Their men are obviously too busy chasing white women. Shouldn't that be your chance?

 

I actually prefer Latin or Italian women. I know Italians are white but I am not big into the blonde hair and blue eyes look.

 

Not that easy.

 

Black & Hispanic men who didn't grow up in the burbs have a natural swagger & assertiveness.

 

The black & Hispanic women I've met that didn't grow up in the burbs require this from a man or they will eat him alive.

[Negative Nancy]

Ok I'm gonna say it: I would never date a black or asian man. It's nothing to do with racism - they're just not my type. Kinda like some men only prefer blondes or some men dig the exotic latina type, I strictly prefer hot, white, tattooed men.

 

I can objectively acknowledge that there are some good-looking black men out there (Denzel being one of them) but I still won't date one cos I prefer my own kind more.

 

Within my own race I have a couple requirements too, for instance I wouldn't consciously choose a man with brown eyes, I just don't like them, I like bluish eyes more. If I happen to fall for a man with brown eyes, ok...but I would not pick one if I had my choice.

Edited December 23, 2011 by Negative Nancy

[Negative Nancy]

I don't know why white women are so sought after, though - if that theory is true. Maybe it's like a status symbol like a big house or an expensive car cos whites have accomplished so many great things and to blacks who were abused as slaves in the past now being someone who has the status symbol of a "white person" now symbolizes their break from slavery or something?

[kaylan]

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,332097,00.html

Again, there are doctors who say differently differently.

 

Some say their motivation is to look Western.

 

Some say their motivation is to look like other Asians.

 

So where does that leave us? People have many motivations for everything.

 

And this does NOT change the fact that many Asians naturally have double eye lids.

 

According to what you are trying to say, that means from now on I can dismiss white folks with tans and implants, as trying to look latina or black.

[kaylan]

Ok I'm gonna say it: I would never date a black or asian man. It's nothing to do with racism - they're just not my type. Kinda like some men only prefer blondes or some men dig the exotic latina type, I strictly prefer hot, white, tattooed men.

 

I can objectively acknowledge that there are some good-looking black men out there (Denzel being one of them) but I still won't date one cos I prefer my own kind more.

 

Within my own race I have a couple requirements too, for instance I wouldn't consciously choose a man with brown eyes, I just don't like them, I like bluish eyes more. If I happen to fall for a man with brown eyes, ok...but I would not pick one if I had my choice.

 

I don't know why white women are so sought after, though - if that theory is true. Maybe it's like a status symbol like a big house or an expensive car cos whites have accomplished so many great things and to blacks who were abused as slaves in the past now being someone who has the status symbol of a "white person" now symbolizes their break from slavery or something?

White is more sought after because Eurocentric ideals tend to hit all people around the world. Read the thread =P. Everyone likes what they like, but we are all socialized into our likes and dislikes. For instance, in America, the media has a LOT to due with the sexual fetishizing that goes on over Asian women and Black men. But than Asian men and Black women get the opposite treatment.

 

However, white does tend to be the standard of beauty due to whites having conquered the world and all. You are not immune. Environment has a lot to do with attraction. We are all products of our societies and upbringing. I can assure you that your first post that I quoted would be a lot different if you grew up in a different society.

 

Then again, I dont take your preference seriously anymore. Ive heard it soooo many times and still Ive been the first black guy a girls hooked up. Its happened enough times for me to know that "hot is hot", despite preferences.

Edited December 23, 2011 by kaylan

[lululucy]

Then again, I dont take your preference seriously anymore. Ive heard it soooo many times and still Ive been the first black guy a girls hooked up. Its happened enough times for me to know that "hot is hot", despite preferences.

 

Totally ~ although I do have a few friends (interestingly who are tattoo artists and big into white tatted guys) who are adamant about never dating someone non-white. I don't know if they'd try if they were approached because I've honestly never seen a black guy talk to these girls. They come off as very hostile and the only guys they ever talk to are ones with really obvious tattoos.

 

I agree though, hot is hot. As height is something for me that factors into hot-ness, the majority of my "type" tend to be white or black but that doesn't mean I'd rule out an Asian guy.

[kaylan]

"You know, Ive never even kissed a black guy before...I know that sounds weird...youre different though"

-Girl from the bar during spring semester.(just finished kissing)

 

This is when my dreads was to my shoulders, and I have a sleeve tattoo, so I always roll my shirt sleeves up.

 

 

"Kay you should kiss me, Ive always wanted to kiss a black guy...hmmm...and I think your hair is sexy"

-coworker from the summer at the bar one night.

 

I stayed away from her though because she has a rep, plus I didnt see her in that way.

 

So given those two situations, I think I could mack your friends haha. Im your typical tattooed rocker in chocolate form lol

[lululucy]

"You know, Ive never even kissed a black guy before...I know that sounds weird...youre different though"

-Girl from the bar during spring semester.(just finished kissing)

 

This is when my dreads was to my shoulders, and I have a sleeve tattoo, so I always roll my shirt sleeves up.

 

 

"Kay you should kiss me, Ive always wanted to kiss a black guy...hmmm...and I think your hair is sexy"

-coworker from the summer at the bar one night.

 

I stayed away from her though because she has a rep, plus I didnt see her in that way.

 

So given those two situations, I think I could mack your friends haha. Im your typical tattooed rocker in chocolate form lol

 

Oh yeah if you've got nice ink and listen to shtty rock (not an insult at you but rock music, I can't stand 90% of it) then you could definitely get in the door hahah

 

You sound exactly like my ex actually, I miss his dreads.

[somedude81]

^Though EP can be rough with his assessments. Hes always consistently right with this one fact: beggars cant be choosers.

 

I never understood why there exists men and women who complain about their dating life, but have unrealistic standards given their situations. Being picky is good up to a point, then ya gotta get real with yourself.

Prefering to date women of my own ethnicity means I have unrealistic standards?

 

It sounds like you think white girls are some highly demanded prize to be won and only the worthy can have them.

[Negative Nancy]

Prefering to date women of my own ethnicity means I have unrealistic standards?

 

Which ethnicity are you talking about? The European one or the cuban one?

 

It sounds like you think white girls are some highly demanded prize to be won and only the worthy can have them.

 

Obviously they are cos you said in the other thread that you are only attracted to us white breads, ahem, broads.

[somedude81]

Which ethnicity are you talking about? The European one or the cuban one?

Since I'm equal parts both, I think I can choose

 

Actually, I don't think I've ever met a Cuban girl that wasn't part of my family.

 

 

Obviously they are cos you said in the other thread that you are only attracted to us white breads, ahem, broads.

LOL white breads.

 

It's just funny how men of other races are so into white girls, it's almost as if they value them more than their own women.

 

While it seems perfectly natural for me to like women my own race. Heck, I prefer women who look like Mom when she was young; light skin, straight blond hair, blue eyes.

[Woggle]

I am married to a hot Italian woman and they are known to require swagger and alpha qualities in their men.

[PlumPrincess]

And this does NOT change the fact that many Asians naturally have double eye lids.

I never said that.

[Feelsgoodman]

I've heard a few Asian girls trash about Asian men; it was disgusting. It sounded like it came from a place of deep hatred. It was so foul and so repulsive. The things that they said, it just makes me shake my head and think where did it all go so wrong.

This is one of the less talked about aspects of multiculturalism. People start to hate their own race/culture because they are exposed to other races and cultures that they for whatever reason like more and see as superior.

 

I treat with suspicion any person who prefers men or women of another race to those of his or her own race. More often than not, such people have deep-rooted psychological issues.

[kaylan]

Prefering to date women of my own ethnicity means I have unrealistic standards?

 

It sounds like you think white girls are some highly demanded prize to be won and only the worthy can have them.

I was not referring to you about unrealistic standards. I was making a general statement.

 

And no I do not think white women are a prize...have you read all of my posts in this thread?...lemme guess...yet again someone glosses over context for the thread.

 

I never said that.

Please review our discourse again. You dismissed it when I informed you that many Asians get the surgery to resemble the Asians they see with double eyelids.

 

So I was informing you that since Asians also have double eyelids naturally, its stupid to think all cases of the surgery are folks trying to be white.

[Tony]

This thread has a "hint" of racism and makes me very uncomfortable. If it goes on, I think it could get out of hand. We have expressed ourselves and learned enough about each others feelings. Over and out!