TX_28 Posted May 30, 2004 Posted May 30, 2004 I am new to this board and I don't know if anyone has had this problem yet. I have been dating my boyfriend now for two and a half years. Everything is beyong what i could have imagined. The biggest drawback is his mother. She is a racist and doesn't like me. I am half hispanic and half German. She if fully supportive of her 19 year old daughter dating a 28 year old but finds way to make comments and treat me like crap in front of my face. My boyfriend understands the situation and dissaproves of her actions, but I don't want to come between his and her relationship. I am strong person and can ignore her ignorance and go about my life cause i will not be beat by her comments. Although at times i find myself getting sad about it. Any advice on how i can cope. I forgot one thing...one of the reason she approves of her daugthers relationships is because her boyfriend make $100,000 + and me and my boyfriend are still in college. Any advice on what i can do cause sometimes i would like to tell her off, but i hold myself back because I wouldn't put my boyfriend in that situation.
amanda25 Posted May 30, 2004 Posted May 30, 2004 Im havin problems in a relationship too.. But I was thinking, what about asking your boyfriend to have a talk with her and tell her to quit?? It don't sound like, to me she is even considering her sons feelings...Or Yours..And that isnt right..
Author TX_28 Posted May 30, 2004 Author Posted May 30, 2004 This women is hardcore Italian and speaks her mind and doesn't care if it hurts anyone's feelings. She speaks first and then thinks about what she said. I know I can handle her stupidity..cause that all it is..STUPIDITY. I think she is mad because she knows how happy we are and she never had that.
amanda25 Posted May 31, 2004 Posted May 31, 2004 Well, Then, If she don't care about hurting your feelings, and if she dont care about her sons feelings, then I wouldnt worry about what I said...I think a person can only take so much, and enough is enough..I would tell him, that maybe the three of you should get together, sit down and talk about it...BOTH you and your boyfriend, tell her that its got to stop..If she isnt willing, then I would just stay away from her..Your boyfriend should understand that at times, it hurts your feelings..And I know its not his fault and you dont want to have him take sides, i wouldnt either, but I wouldnt take crap off of her either..Your human, just like she is..She dont have the right to treat or make you feel any different..
Author TX_28 Posted May 31, 2004 Author Posted May 31, 2004 Do you think that i should kill her with niceness, and whenever she makes a comment, make a smart comment back? Cause i think it is time she starts playing my game instead of me losing to hers.
amanda25 Posted June 1, 2004 Posted June 1, 2004 That too is a good idea!! You are acting more mature than she is, that is for sure!!
amanda25 Posted June 1, 2004 Posted June 1, 2004 You know, I was just thinking, that is a good idea...Before I said I would be rude back, but now that I think about it, If you are mean back, that is basically telling her "you got to me,you won"..Be the better person in the situation like you said, and be smart about it, but stick to your grounds..Your boyfriend should be helping the situation..No he should NEVER have to choose or feel like he has to, but if he knows his mom is wrong, he needs to be saying something to her also.. GOOD LUCK GIRL!
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