First date, we made out, almost had sex. After date, she never initiates the text's

[dasein]

Take it from me, OP. I'm a woman who knows what women want when it comes to dating. We don't want a guy that pushes us toward sex and we don't want to f*ck on the first date. At least us nice chicks don't. If you want a whore then follow Dasein's advice.

 

Take it from me, OP, I'm a man who has dated over 30 women OLD over the years who started off with low success and now have much more control over my choices and options dating. ALWAYS make your sexual interest known in a respectful way and NEVER have an arbitrary limit as to what you will or won't do on a first date. There are lots of horny women out there using the site to get casual sex, and if you find them attractive and get in the mood on an early date, GO FOR IT and enjoy the mutual fun. Up to you whether you want to continue with those types, because unlike you, they could be doing the same things with a different guy every night, and their behavior may be impulsive/compulsive.

 

If you choose to slow things down, that's your option, but the point is it's better to have options and control than not for a man doing early OLD. Do things exactly as you are doing them, and when the time comes, decide whether YOU are comfortable proceeding or not. (they hate it when men have this kind of control of the situation, as it takes early power they are used to wielding away... who cares? let em sit and spin! better to be the benevolent dictator than be subject to their flaky, inconsistent ways).

[ShannonMI]

When I do get a second date with her. I will only limit it to kissing and probably touching. She will probably notice that, having seen how far we went on the first date and be very intrigued that I didn't try to go farther than kissing.

 

It will be F*CKEN tempting trying to hold in my desires, but the wait will make it even more intense once we actually have sex.

Don't expect to get a second date with her. And if you do get one, tell her you want to slow things down a bit. I bet she will respond well to that.

[dasein]

why she isn't interested in him now and why she never initiates anything. It's because she feels badly about sucking his dick. I would bet on it. Because according to him the rest of the date went very well.

 

They've only had ONE date. How many noncrazy women do you know who are interested in a guy start initiating contact after one date? Do you? Didn't think so. OTOH, she is responding to all his contacts. If she weren't interested, were insulted, she wouldn't be responding. Moreover, it's holiday week, and finals for OP.

 

There is no need to jump into something sexual.

 

OP, if a woman wants to get physical, and shows you that during a date, whether it's kissing or full on sex, and you don't do that, more than likely she will get turned off. It's better to go a little too far than risking her getting a weird vibe or "he is inexperienced." Is sex obligatory? Of course not, but adopt hard rules about going too far on early dates at your own risk. Let things always be case-by-case.

 

The double profile is a sure sign that she wants to move on from what happened. She wants a fresh start and made a new profile to do that. I bet the next time she goes on a first date, she won't be giving any blow jobs.

 

LOL yet she is still responsive to OP? I think not. The double profile is a sign of another guy(s) in the picture or of some kind of disorder that includes "secret keeping" in its pathology.

[ShannonMI]

They've only had ONE date. How many noncrazy women do you know who are interested in a guy start initiating contact after one date? Do you? Didn't think so. OTOH, she is responding to all his contacts. If she weren't interested, were insulted, she wouldn't be responding. Moreover, it's holiday week, and finals for OP.

 

 

 

OP, if a woman wants to get physical, and shows you that during a date, whether it's kissing or full on sex, and you don't do that, more than likely she will get turned off. It's better to go a little too far than risking her getting a weird vibe or "he is inexperienced." Is sex obligatory? Of course not, but adopt hard rules about going too far on early dates at your own risk. Let things always be case-by-case.

 

 

 

LOL yet she is still responsive to OP? I think not. The double profile is a sign of another guy(s) in the picture or of some kind of disorder that includes "secret keeping" in its pathology.

Apparently you know best because you are a habitual online dater. I'm not. I personally hate OLD. I'm just working off my own personal experience with a first date that went awry because of sex. I was disgusted with myself the next day and didn't want to initiate contact with the guy or even see him again. Just because the chick responds to his texts doesn't mean sh*t. I respond to the guy I went on the date with. He's text me a few times. I'm polite. Instead of ignoring his messages, I give him short answers. He's finally taken a hint because now he doesn't contact me. Plus I was up front with him about how uncomfortable I was with what happened. This could be the case with this girl.

 

Whatever. I'm done arguing the point with you. I'm just glad OP realizes he went a little too fast on the first date and hopefully he won't make the same mistake twice. No matter if you think getting into a chick's panties on the first date is doing a "good job" it's really not the way things should be done.

[dasein]

Shannon, your experience was different because it didn't sound like a progression with checkpoints as OP's does. It sounds like you got drunk and did something you wouldn't have otherwise done because the guy set out to take advantage, not the same as OP's case, as I doubt they were doing much drinking at their age or at least OP didn't mention it. I always enjoy your posts, as they are open and honest, we just disagree on OP's situation. As far as me being a habitual OLD, I've been doing it off and on for ten years, and had a LTR during that time also.

[Imajerk17]

I think the women are being way too harsh on you here. The two of you had a moment and sex happened. It was on her as much as him (moreso on her, as she is the one who seems uncomfortable with what happened) to put the brakes on.

 

Eh.... the girl is 19. She probably doesn't know what her boundaries are especially when it comes to sex. So I also think that this girl feels funny for what happened.

 

Anyway, since she is still responding to your texts, I would talk to her point blank about how she feels about what happened. Do it over the phone. Since she is responding to your texts, text her "Hey, I want to talk to you about something." She probably will say "What?" Then call her.

Edited December 21, 2011 by Imajerk17

[bean1]

I don't think I'm being too harsh. If all the OP wants is casual sex then by all means, do so, I guess that's a good way to filter out who is looking for casual sex.

 

However, if he is looking for long-term girlfriend material or even wife material, such an overt sexual aggressiveness will likely turn off any woman who is interested in more than casual sex.

 

If a woman gives oral sex to a guy 3 hours after meeting him in person, is she still a candidate for girlfriend/wife material? Really? Is she? Because I think a lot of men would say hell no. Some would say yes - the problem is that most women looking for a real relationship will not bother to take that risk because she knows a man who asks to give oral after 3 hours is likely just looking for sex.

 

So again it depends on what OP is looking for.

[Imajerk17]

This is hilarious. As men, we're supposed to be the aggressors but now we are also supposed to be mind readers too? If the woman was so "turned off", why didn't she say no? Wasn't it her responsibility to say no?

 

Even if the OP was looking for a relationship, he did the right thing. Yes, many ONS don't lead to LTRs, but that is often because the guy doesn't take the girl seriously afterwards.

[ShannonMI]

This is hilarious. As men, we're supposed to be the aggressors but now we are also supposed to be mind readers too? If the woman was so "turned off", why didn't she say no? Wasn't it her responsibility to say no?

 

Even if the OP was looking for a relationship, he did the right thing. Yes, many ONS don't lead to LTRs, but that is often because the guy doesn't take the girl seriously afterwards.

Why didn't she say no? She's young. Like you said, she doesn't know what her boundries are yet. Later when she thought about it, she probably felt bad about it. Also, maybe she's a people pleaser. She may have a hard time saying no. There are people like that, you know.

[Imajerk17]

Why didn't she say no? She's young. Like you said, she doesn't know what her boundries are yet. Later when she thought about it, she probably felt bad about it. Also, maybe she's a people pleaser. She may have a hard time saying no. There are people like that, you know.

 

 

Yes and yes. I agree with you that she is young, and might not know her boundaries, and might be a people-pleaser. BUT where I think we disagree is that despite that, I still feel that it was HER responsibility to say no, while you and the other ladies seem to think it was HIS responsibility to not go for sex.

 

This girl is really a stranger to the OP, so how was he supposed to know her views on sex. As you mentioned, a lot of girls are cool with sex on the first date. What if he had "done the right thing" and not had sex with her, but then she goes out with another guy the next week and does have sex with him (and ends up with him, because she had sex with him). That situation happens too.

 

EDIT: My previous advice to the OP still stands: Anyway, since she is still responding to your texts, I would talk to her point blank about how she feels about what happened. Do it over the phone. Since she is responding to your texts, text her "Hey, I want to talk to you about something." She probably will say "What?" Then call her.

Edited December 21, 2011 by Imajerk17

[dasein]

One thing we haven't addressed is your later post that you have been on the site for 8 months and this is your first date. Are you sending enough outbound mails? What percentage of mails you are sending are being responded to. The end goal here is a 50% response rate or higher, and most guys who aren't very handsome, tall with a great career start at 10% response rate or lower.

 

You want to be smart about who you mail. I only mail women who have been active on the site in the last 24-48 hours, never ever ones who haven't been on in a week-month or more. Your email should be a "three pointer," two points about her profile and at least one "question" point about something. No more than a couple paragraphs. Your emails should feed back into your profile and enlarge on what you have put in there while at the same time drawing commonality with hers. Make sure to have decent, flattering, real pictures that are recent. One doing something active, this one is good for the full body shot or with a pet, a couple of different headshot angles. Have 10-20 pics and let a woman you know and trust help pick which to use. This is important, as I had a pic on my profile that I thought was better, and a female friend suggested a different one and my results went way up.

 

Once you get a response, ask for the phone number in the second email. Make it plain in your profile that you are looking to meet and date, not for penpals or IM buddies. Offer your phone number in that mail in case she is uncomfortable giving you hers. If you have done things right, almost all of them will give the number in this mail.

 

Call within 24-36 hours of getting the number and have a specific date and time in mind that you think will appeal to her, near her area, best is a place she is comfortable and easy for her to get to, this cuts the flake factor immensely. I don't do coffee dates at all, there's always something better on a first meet, try for something partially active if you can come up with those types of options. Then there will be a sitdown part of the date, maybe get an appetizer or not at a restaurant/bar, make sure not to sit across a table, you want her to be able to touch you and vice versa.

 

During this time, pour on whatever it is that gets a woman sexually interested enough to blow you on a first date. This is where most guys FAIL and where you seem to be a natural. Keep things light, funny, flirty and seductive. You are doing this right when you get the "she can't keep her hands off me" response. Once you are good enough, you can get them making out with you right on the spot, and this is what you are going for. You now have reasonable belief that you meet or exceed her physical standards (unless she is a total nut, those are wildcards and tend to stick out... if they start dirty talk there on the first date, that's the type of bad sign you are looking for).

 

Many of these will be up for more physically, just like the girl you took out. You can ask them as you did, but better to let them initiate, even good to be a bit "hands off the merch" at this point. Up to you and your comfort as to how far to proceed and whether she is doing this same thing with a different guy from the site every night. Whatever you do, keep pouring on the charm and flirtation, they love it.

 

After the date, NO texts, NO calls for a cooling off period. The earliest I will call is 36 hours or so after the date. I may not call at all until I have the next date idea planned. The ones who go batsh-t or throw tude from not being called in three days are bad ones, use this test to cull those out. the good ones have a LIFE and will appreciate that you do too and aren't blowing up their phone. Limit your contact to calls to ask out for the first 3-5 dates until you get a "she's worth my further time and attention" vibe. IME about 1 in 4 actually are, and I will ask 1/2 of them for the second date to make sure one is a bad bet. Keep contact limited to asking out and keep yourself sane during this part. The best is if you can be dating 2-4 at the same time.

 

When they start giving you "you seem like a player" GOOD, it means you are doing things right and they are insecure. Anything to keep that HR red pencil out of their hands. The proper response to that is to laugh at them and ask them if every player they meet wants to take them out and have a good time on fun dates or calls late at night and wants them to come over for a booty call? They will squirm at this and then you say something to the effect of "play your cards right, be cool, and you just might get what you want," while smiling flirtatiously. Don't cross the line into arrogance, but do let her know subtly and even directly that you are every bit as much of a prize as she is.

 

Well that's way too long and hope it helps some, good luck OLD and I still think dual profile girl is going to turn out a bad bet unless she has a really good explanation for the dual profile.

[bean1]

Yes and yes. I agree with you that she is young, and might not know her boundaries, and might be a people-pleaser. BUT where I think we disagree is that despite that, I still feel that it was HER responsibility to say no, while you and the other ladies seem to think it was HIS responsibility to not go for sex.

 

Sorry if I gave that impression but no, it was absolutely HER mistake to go forward if she didn't want to. But IMO he is still wrong for initiating it too IF he wanted anything more than a casual ONS. Most long-term girlfriend or wife material-type girls would have said no and not spoken to him again after that - as you said, most men will not take a girl seriously if she agrees to that, so those who don't feel like screwing random men from online will not even bother with returning a phone call.

[ShannonMI]

Sorry if I gave that impression but no, it was absolutely HER mistake to go forward if she didn't want to. But IMO he is still wrong for initiating it too IF he wanted anything more than a casual ONS. Most long-term girlfriend or wife material-type girls would have said no and not spoken to him again after that - as you said, most men will not take a girl seriously if she agrees to that, so those who don't feel like screwing random men from online will not even bother with returning a phone call.

Ditto to this. I guess us women see things differently. Most men think sex is no big deal. We're not that way most of the time. At least the decent women aren't.

[Dust]

Me: 22 She: 19

I met the girl online and talked with her for 2-3 days and she mentioned one day that it was her last day that she can meet up with me because her dad was coming home (protective dad supposedly). It was finals week and I did not want to lose focus but I did not want to lose her either after getting her really interested. She knew I was sacrificing study time to meet her and stuff.

Being the spontaneous person that I am, I ended up meeting her. We talked, hanged out, no awkward situations, pretty fast physical contact between each other and I was immensely comfortable with her. Date lasted for a little over 3 hours and everything was flowing and spontaneous as we went from 1 activity to the next.

 

On the way , before I drop her off to go home, I told her I really like her and was interested and wasn't going to play any games and that I was very comfortable with her. (Enough to even sing along with music in the car). So I told her what does she want to do? How far is she willing to go that night. She said shes down to make out. We did that a bit and it was great, she followed my kissing as I lead very well.

 

After that, I told her I really wanted to eat her out because it's one of my favorite things. She said that would be good but she was on her period! So that didn't happen. Anyways, we got as far as me sucking on her nipples and her giving me oral, not long enough for me to blast though because it started to reach 1am and I had finals the next day at 10am LOL!

 

 

After this happened I text her telling her thanks for a great date and night and I am very comfortable with her and I want to see her again. She informed me BEFORE going on the date that it will be difficult for me to meet her after that day because of holidays and family being home so she has to spend time with family or can't go out.

 

So I keep in contact with the phone and texts. She deleted her dating profile after we went on the date. She said something about her being on there too much when I mentioned it. The problem is, she never initiates the texts! I went 2 days without texting her just to see the reaction, and nothing! But when I do text, she responds accordingly every time. I haven't text her for 1 day. But before that 1 day, I wanted her to send a picture of herself. She didn't totally say no, but it took 1 day for her to eventually send a picture of herself to me after I initiated by sending my picture first. I mean the fact she responds like this by actually sending the pic means she's still interested right?

 

PS: I ask for her to give a date for when we can meet again and she says she doesn't know yet.

 

 

tl;dr First date, Great date, great night. Made out, got oral, sucked boobs. No sex/pussy because of period (that time of the month). Following the days after, she never initiates texts. I start the conversations, she replies often, but doesn't move conversation's forward and I have to keep it going. She hasn't initiate or text first... What's the deal?

 

 

IMPORTANT NEW UPDATE:

As I said before, she deleted her profile. And when I mentioned that I noticed she delete her profile, she told me that ya she deleted it because she was on the dating site too much.

 

Just right now, when I was doing a search for some girls on the dating site, I ran across her again with a different profile name. She re wrote information in her profile with less information, less words than her previous profile.

 

 

Man this girl is damn confusing. Why would she tell me she delete her profile because she was on it too much and then ended up creating another profile with a different name?

In addition, she responds to me and also sent a picture when I ask. What the **** is going on?

 

Should I confront her about this situation and say something? Or should I ignore it and just keep continuing the texts and conversations? We've only been on 1 date, keep in mind. I don't want to be out of line by saying something about her deleting the acc and creating another one, while she told me something else.

 

A few thoughts... Why didn't you cum when she gave you the bj? Were you wearing a condom... or did you masturbate that day or the day before?

 

Why do you expect her to call txt you? I mean you're the guy right? You have to do pretty much all the chasing in the begining and you my friend are very much in the begining. That means you do all the chasing. Eventually the girl needs to chase back but you wern't at that point.

 

The msg about having a comfortable date or what ever was so lame. I mean it! Why didn't you send her a msg about how beautiful you think she is and how you can't get her off your mind or some crap like that. I find you comfortable.... bad!

 

So CHASE her. You call her and stop expecting it to be her calling you. Tell her how sweet she is and how you need to see her again. Be cool!

 

It was NOT a great date. Maybe it was for you because you got your dick licked for a few minutes. Don't EVER ask a girl if you can eat her out or if she'd like to blow you on a first date. That is the best advice I can give you. This is why the girl is not contacting you now. She feels very uncomfortable about how fast things went. Learn from this and DO NOT do it again.

 

You're looking at it from your perspective. He needs to see it from his perspective. I think he was a little lame. Getting the bj and sucking her boobs will be memories for life!

 

ShannonMI you can gaurantee if we had a date I'd want to do more then a few things you'd be regretting!

 

Well, that depends on what the OP wants. If a man asked me such a question after 3 hours, I would expect that he is looking for cheap sex and I would be insulted. I would walk away from that "date". Young naive girls may perceive that as some sort of compliment but to other women, that is a crude thing to say and insulting. So, go ahead and establish your "sexual signals" but be careful what kind of fish you catch with that net.

 

I disagree. This notion that your some devient if you have sex early and that you're great if you have the will power to hold out for some specified sanctioned amount of time is silly. I agree its good policy to wait... but I really woud be up for what they did right off the bat if I was feeling a girl.

 

I think he made other mistakes wich I already mentioned. Like being lame about always wanting her to txt him when technicaly they just met on the net. He's the guy he should chase, and again that txt he sent about being comfortable after they got hot and heavy very lame.

 

Early sex is a reality today. Whether sex actually happens or not, he is doing the right things by getting her in the mood for it, as it signals he is positioning himself as desirable. Much better than the "cheek turning" kiss at the end of a date which signals she isn't interested sexually. Regardless of "getting to know" and all that, the FIRST step in a successful date for a man is confirming that she finds him physically, sexually attractive enough. Things go nowhere until that is established. LS women need to try to see things from the other side more. Men don't typically get the kind of positive physical feedback and compliments that women get without making it happen.

 

Double profiles on the dating site though? Bad bad sign, trust me, move on.

 

The double profiles is odd... but I could see reasons for this. I wouldn't confont her on that.

 

Sex is a reality today. I'm not saying he needs to do what he did... but it won't be the thing that stopped him. It will end inspight of the fact they had sex not because of it. It actually will only help him.

 

Take it from me, OP, I'm a man who has dated over 30 women OLD over the years who started off with low success and now have much more control over my choices and options dating. ALWAYS make your sexual interest known in a respectful way and NEVER have an arbitrary limit as to what you will or won't do on a first date. There are lots of horny women out there using the site to get casual sex, and if you find them attractive and get in the mood on an early date, GO FOR IT and enjoy the mutual fun. Up to you whether you want to continue with those types, because unlike you, they could be doing the same things with a different guy every night, and their behavior may be impulsive/compulsive.

 

If you choose to slow things down, that's your option, but the point is it's better to have options and control than not for a man doing early OLD. Do things exactly as you are doing them, and when the time comes, decide whether YOU are comfortable proceeding or not. (they hate it when men have this kind of control of the situation, as it takes early power they are used to wielding away... who cares? let em sit and spin! better to be the benevolent dictator than be subject to their flaky, inconsistent ways).

 

I agree with this. Slow things down if thats what you want. Do not have some lame arbitrary limit of what you will do because you think it will help or you will miss out on some of the best times of your life. Plus I've had some very long relationships started with first date sex.

 

I think the women are being way too harsh on you here. The two of you had a moment and sex happened. It was on her as much as him (moreso on her, as she is the one who seems uncomfortable with what happened) to put the brakes on.

 

Eh.... the girl is 19. She probably doesn't know what her boundaries are especially when it comes to sex. So I also think that this girl feels funny for what happened.

 

Anyway, since she is still responding to your texts, I would talk to her point blank about how she feels about what happened. Do it over the phone. Since she is responding to your texts, text her "Hey, I want to talk to you about something." She probably will say "What?" Then call her.

 

Yes the women are being harsh. It's their insecurities speaking.

[bean1]

I'm not insecure. I'm happily married and met my husband online. Sex on the 3rd date. To me, that's "early". 3 hours? That's not "early", that's just a one night stand. Men don't take ONS seriously. Maybe some do - but she'd have to go through 20 of them before she found a serious one.

 

If a man asks for a blowjob after 3 hours then most women would assume he is only looking for casual sex. I don't understand why a woman would think otherwise? Why? Why would she think otherwise?

[ShannonMI]

A few thoughts... Why didn't you cum when she gave you the bj? Were you wearing a condom... or did you masturbate that day or the day before?

 

Why do you expect her to call txt you? I mean you're the guy right? You have to do pretty much all the chasing in the begining and you my friend are very much in the begining. That means you do all the chasing. Eventually the girl needs to chase back but you wern't at that point.

 

The msg about having a comfortable date or what ever was so lame. I mean it! Why didn't you send her a msg about how beautiful you think she is and how you can't get her off your mind or some crap like that. I find you comfortable.... bad!

 

So CHASE her. You call her and stop expecting it to be her calling you. Tell her how sweet she is and how you need to see her again. Be cool!

 

 

 

You're looking at it from your perspective. He needs to see it from his perspective. I think he was a little lame. Getting the bj and sucking her boobs will be memories for life!

 

ShannonMI you can gaurantee if we had a date I'd want to do more then a few things you'd be regretting!

 

 

 

I disagree. This notion that your some devient if you have sex early and that you're great if you have the will power to hold out for some specified sanctioned amount of time is silly. I agree its good policy to wait... but I really woud be up for what they did right off the bat if I was feeling a girl.

 

I think he made other mistakes wich I already mentioned. Like being lame about always wanting her to txt him when technicaly they just met on the net. He's the guy he should chase, and again that txt he sent about being comfortable after they got hot and heavy very lame.

 

 

 

The double profiles is odd... but I could see reasons for this. I wouldn't confont her on that.

 

Sex is a reality today. I'm not saying he needs to do what he did... but it won't be the thing that stopped him. It will end inspight of the fact they had sex not because of it. It actually will only help him.

 

 

 

I agree with this. Slow things down if thats what you want. Do not have some lame arbitrary limit of what you will do because you think it will help or you will miss out on some of the best times of your life. Plus I've had some very long relationships started with first date sex.

 

 

 

Yes the women are being harsh. It's their insecurities speaking.

He didn't cum because she gave him a half assed blow job. She licked it a few times and that was about it. It takes a little more work to get a guy off orally. That right there tells me the girl probably just did it to go along with things. She sounds like a people pleaser to me. She feels bad saying no even though she shouldn't.

 

Hahahahahahaha oh you would take me to pound town on the first date? I bet you would, you dirty boy. I've since learned my lesson about first dates. There will be no sex. I know I'll regret it later if I do it. I have a 3 date rule now. And that's only if I'm really into a guy. If I'm not, there will be no sex and no multiple dates. Period.

 

My views on first date sex have nothing to do with my insecurities. I don't want to be "that girl". I want to have respect for myself and I want the man to respect me. Why does that make me insecure?

[Dust]

If a man asks for a blowjob after 3 hours then most women would assume he is only looking for casual sex. I don't understand why a woman would think otherwise? Why? Why would she think otherwise?

 

Thanks for the laugh! The last why should have been followed by an "!"

 

The guy in the OP obviously wants to date this girl. I've also wanted to date girls I've had quick sex with.

[bean1]

Thanks for the laugh! The last why should have been followed by an "!"

 

The guy in the OP obviously wants to date this girl. I've also wanted to date girls I've had quick sex with.

 

You're right, he does. And so did you. The question is - how many guys does a girl have to blow on the first date for one of them to actually call her back? 1,5,10?

[Dust]

He didn't cum because she gave him a half assed blow job. She licked it a few times and that was about it. It takes a little more work to get a guy off orally. That right there tells me the girl probably just did it to go along with things. She sounds like a people pleaser to me. She feels bad saying no even though she shouldn't.

 

Hahahahahahaha oh you would take me to pound town on the first date? I bet you would, you dirty boy. I've since learned my lesson about first dates. There will be no sex. I know I'll regret it later if I do it. I have a 3 date rule now. And that's only if I'm really into a guy. If I'm not, there will be no sex and no multiple dates. Period.

 

My views on first date sex have nothing to do with my insecurities. I don't want to be "that girl". I want to have respect for myself and I want the man to respect me. Why does that make me insecure?

 

Remember the time you thought hook up meant sex and it didn't? Well now you think him not cumming means bad bj. I get the picture that this guy has trouble enjoying sex... We'll see whose right!

 

Shanon on our first date my car would break down in the middle of no where and mysteriously start working again after you'd been completely enjoyed! I take your 3 date rule and stick my balls in its mouth! Just out of curiousity how does a 3 date rule work... does it also have to be over the course of 3 weeks?

 

You are a little insecure and I enjoy that but you're right it has nothing to do with your 3 date rule it has to do with your shame. Is it sick that your shame turns me on?

[Dust]

You're right, he does. And so did you. The question is - how many guys does a girl have to blow on the first date for one of them to actually call her back? 1,5,10?

 

Well honey we're playing the game from different sides of the field. For the most part as a guy its our job to step up and make things happen. We get rejected a lot because we're the ones trying out if you will. Now you can't expect us to reject ourselves can you.

 

No where in this guys post did I get the picture that he did anything more then try. He would have kept trying to date this girl if she had just kissed. It's her fault if she gave a bj she didn't want to. He had every reason to want that bj and damn sure he got it!

[ShannonMI]

Remember the time you thought hook up meant sex and it didn't? Well now you think him not cumming means bad bj. I get the picture that this guy has trouble enjoying sex... We'll see whose right!

 

Shanon on our first date my car would break down in the middle of no where and mysteriously start working again after you'd been completely enjoyed! I take your 3 date rule and stick my balls in its mouth! Just out of curiousity how does a 3 date rule work... does it also have to be over the course of 3 weeks?

 

You are a little insecure and I enjoy that but you're right it has nothing to do with your 3 date rule it has to do with your shame. Is it sick that your shame turns me on?

Hahahaha you are a sexual deviant, aren't you? What do you look like? Are you at least an attractive sexual deviant?

 

Read how the guy descriped the chick's blow job. It lasted about 2 seconds and she barely did anything. Tells me she didn't like doing it. A girl that likes giving head and is totally comfortable with it, will give it her all and try to make a guy explode.

 

I think one date a week would be good, but I'm not saying it HAS to be that way. Just 3 dates to get to know someone. That isn't asking a lot. And I forgot to mention that those 3 dates have to be SOBER dates. Getting to know someone is a bit hard to do when you can barely stand up and when the room is spinning.

 

I do have insecurities for sure. Everyone does. I am ashamed I got drunk on a first date and had sex. I'll admit that. But now I recognize I don't want to be like that and I'm changing it. That will not happen to me ever again.

[ShannonMI]

Well honey we're playing the game from different sides of the field. For the most part as a guy its our job to step up and make things happen. We get rejected a lot because we're the ones trying out if you will. Now you can't expect us to reject ourselves can you.

 

No where in this guys post did I get the picture that he did anything more then try. He would have kept trying to date this girl if she had just kissed. It's her fault if she gave a bj she didn't want to. He had every reason to want that bj and damn sure he got it!

A guy can "step up" by going in for a passionate kiss at the end of the date. Not "hey baby, you mind if I lick your cl*t for awhile or would you like to blow me?" Come on. He shouldn't have even asked such a thing. Not on a first date.

[clientx]

A guy can "step up" by going in for a passionate kiss at the end of the date. Not "hey baby, you mind if I lick your cl*t for awhile or would you like to blow me?" Come on. He shouldn't have even asked such a thing. Not on a first date.

 

lol if you put it that way.... of course it sounds bad!

 

However, we had already made out and I told her that eating a girl out is one of my favorite things. I was damn ready to give it to her, and she would have loved it! Too bad she was on her period... might have just been an excuse though, I didn't check.

 

I forgot to add that when I sucked on her boobs, she moaned a bit. Which even shows more interest in the whole situation, not nervousness or reluctance.

 

I gotta admit, she was a bit reluctant to give a suck it seems. However, as I said, when she did start to go down, it was getting a bit late and I told her before the date, that I can't be out too late.

 

In the end, I do want to date her and develop a relationship because apart from the sexual stuff, we did connect and I am comfortable with her and she is beautiful and I do like her as a person not as an object.

 

I'm going to have to read everything and decide what I will continue with. Good thing we have forums, many of these ideas I wouldn't have come up by my own.

Edited December 21, 2011 by clientx

[Dust]

Hahahaha you are a sexual deviant, aren't you? What do you look like? Are you at least an attractive sexual deviant?

 

Just horny! I'm a tall, dark, and handsome man.

 

Read how the guy descriped the chick's blow job. It lasted about 2 seconds and she barely did anything. Tells me she didn't like doing it. A girl that likes giving head and is totally comfortable with it, will give it her all and try to make a guy explode.

 

I think one date a week would be good, but I'm not saying it HAS to be that way. Just 3 dates to get to know someone. That isn't asking a lot. And I forgot to mention that those 3 dates have to be SOBER dates. Getting to know someone is a bit hard to do when you can barely stand up and when the room is spinning.

 

I do have insecurities for sure. Everyone does. I am ashamed I got drunk on a first date and had sex. I'll admit that. But now I recognize I don't want to be like that and I'm changing it. That will not happen to me ever again.

 

The way I understood it he ended the blow job and it had nothing to do with the quality of the blow job. Something about him not wanting to be out late... really lame.

 

lol if you put it that way.... of course it sounds bad!

 

However, we had already made out and I told her that eating a girl out is one of my favorite things. I was damn ready to give it to her, and she would have loved it! Too bad she was on her period... might have just been an excuse though, I didn't check.

 

I forgot to add that when I sucked on her boobs, she moaned a bit. Which even shows more interest in the whole situation, not nervousness or reluctance.

 

I gotta admit, she was a bit reluctant to give a suck it seems. However, as I said, when she did start to go down, it was getting a bit late and I told her before the date, that I can't be out too late.

 

In the end, I do want to date her and develop a relationship because apart from the sexual stuff, we did connect and I am comfortable with her and she is beautiful and I do like her as a person not as an object.

 

I'm going to have to read everything and decide what I will continue with. Good thing we have forums, many of these ideas I wouldn't have come up by my own.

 

When a girl gives you a bj you cum in her mouth! You don't start talking about how its getting late. You probably really insulted her.

[ShannonMI]

lol if you put it that way.... of course it sounds bad!

 

However, we had already made out and I told her that eating a girl out is one of my favorite things. I was damn ready to give it to her, and she would have loved it! Too bad she was on her period... might have just been an excuse though, I didn't check.

 

I forgot to add that when I sucked on her boobs, she moaned a bit. Which even shows more interest in the whole situation, not nervousness or reluctance.

 

I gotta admit, she was a bit reluctant to give a suck it seems. However, as I said, when she did start to go down, it was getting a bit late and I told her before the date, that I can't be out too late.

 

In the end, I do want to date her and develop a relationship because apart from the sexual stuff, we did connect and I am comfortable with her and she is beautiful and I do like her as a person not as an object.

 

I'm going to have to read everything and decide what I will continue with. Good thing we have forums, many of these ideas I wouldn't have come up by my own.

I'm sure you didn't say it like that, but that's pretty much what you meant. And the period thing was an excuse. She probably didn't have it

at all. I've actually used that excuse before myself when I didn't want to bang a guy.

 

As far as her moaning. Big deal. She probably liked it. Doesn't mean she didn't regret doing it later. I liked the sex I had with the guy I had the ONS with. It felt damn good after not having it for close to 4 months, but it doesn't mean I didn't beat the ever loving sh*t out of myself the next day.

 

All I'm saying is take it slow with her if you really like her. That's all. I'm not saying you are bad for doing what you did, but it wasn't the wisest thing to do on a first date. According to Desein though, you did the right thing. I'm just giving you the female prospective. I've been in this girl's shoes before, although my circumstances were a bit different. I felt terrible the next day and I wanted nothing to do with the guy. Mostly because I got wasted while he stayed sober. I feel like he took advantage a bit. Oh well. It is what it is.