Author SkyEmtRN Posted December 22, 2011 Author Posted December 22, 2011 out of the blue, so what does that mean? well since youve had contact with her she doesnt miss you anymore. thats why she told you that you shouldnt have any contact, or of course it could be a test. for the love of jesus, stop contacting her. i know you told her that right now, but youre still continuing to answer her texts everytime youre trying to not do it. i was writing my full story, some erorr came up and it never psoted....long story i wrote to...
chados Posted December 22, 2011 Posted December 22, 2011 i was writing my full story, some erorr came up and it never psoted....long story i wrote to... alright. well right now its kinda hard to change anything. just dont contact her:p
Author SkyEmtRN Posted December 22, 2011 Author Posted December 22, 2011 alright. well right now its kinda hard to change anything. just dont contact her:p Yea. The longer version to the story above. She sent that message then I kind of blew up but...she caught me in a really bad time studying for a difficult final. I didn't say anthing bad towards her didn't call her names etc. Then next morning she sends a text message saying "it sucks because I don't im in love anymore. and I still think i made the right choice," she said she keeps thinking of the negatives that happened in the relationship but i was countering them with the good times we had. So the last thing I said "U talking to me is pushing me away. Me talking to you is pushing you away. Right now at this moments its best to just stop talking. For now NOT forever. If in this space u do put that nager behind adn remember the good times we had and how supportive i was and that you do love me. Then contact me before its too late. Enjoy your holidays" And since that message (sent yesterday morning) we have been in NC and I have no intention of calling/texting/messaging her. IF she does contact me in several days then something is up with her. BUT I'm not going to respond back. Hopefully the christmas season can get to her.
chados Posted December 22, 2011 Posted December 22, 2011 "Then next morning she sends a text message saying "it sucks because I don't im in love anymore. and I still think i made the right choice," this is why you shouldnt contact her, not time to miss you at all. she broke up with you, she doesnt want you and you want her back. " she said she keeps thinking of the negatives that happened in the relationship but i was countering them with the good times we had." why?? this even worse, this is you pushing her to choose something thats important for you. this is not respecting the breakup. of course she's gonna think about the bad stuff and youre gonna think about the good. thats why you should leave her alone so that you can think about the bad stuff and she can think about the good. she can only do that if she misses you, and you can only do that if youre moving on. "So the last thing I said "U talking to me is pushing me away. Me talking to you is pushing you away" samt thing here. everything you told her about accepting the breakup was just a lie. youre acting desperate.
Eeyore79 Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 "she broke up with you, she doesnt want you and you want her back. When someone dumps you, it isn't always because they don't want you. Sometimes it's because they feel like you don't want them, and it's too painful to stay in that sort of relationship where you love someone who obviously doesn't love you back. Your gf broke up with you because she felt neglected - not because she doesn't love you, but because she felt like you don't love her, otherwise you wouldn't neglect her. If you actually do want to be with her, being dumped is supposed to be your wake-up call where you go "Omg I'm losing her, I'd better up my game and start paying her more attention." If you don't up your game, that just confirms that you don't love her and don't care enough to try to win her back. NC at this point will just push her further away, because it will reinforce the idea that you're neglecting her. She's maintaining contact because she's waiting for you to be sorry for your behavior, apologize and try to make things up with her. If you love her, miss her and want to reconcile, your best bet is to meet up with her, apologize for neglecting her and beg for a second chance. Neglecting her any further will just worsen the situation and push her away completely. 1
chados Posted December 23, 2011 Posted December 23, 2011 When someone dumps you, it isn't always because they don't want you. Sometimes it's because they feel like you don't want them, and it's too painful to stay in that sort of relationship where you love someone who obviously doesn't love you back. Your gf broke up with you because she felt neglected - not because she doesn't love you, but because she felt like you don't love her, otherwise you wouldn't neglect her. If you actually do want to be with her, being dumped is supposed to be your wake-up call where you go "Omg I'm losing her, I'd better up my game and start paying her more attention." If you don't up your game, that just confirms that you don't love her and don't care enough to try to win her back. NC at this point will just push her further away, because it will reinforce the idea that you're neglecting her. She's maintaining contact because she's waiting for you to be sorry for your behavior, apologize and try to make things up with her. If you love her, miss her and want to reconcile, your best bet is to meet up with her, apologize for neglecting her and beg for a second chance. Neglecting her any further will just worsen the situation and push her away completely. do you think all breakups are honest? you could say whatever you want just to make yourself feel better and to not hurt the dumpee. he has already tried to beg. didnt work, he contacts her, same thing, he gets neglected. do you really think it would be a great idea to chase her?. she told him she didnt want to be with him, and now she told him that she doesnt love him anymore. why would he contact her at this point?, if they love you they should try to make things better. it takes two to tango
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