wendyloman Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 Now that I'm in my early 30's, meeting single women I'm interested in is a lot harder than it was in college. I was out for drinks with a female friend last week, and she said I come off as unapproachable. After a bunch of follow up questions she couldn't really nail down what she thought the cause was. So ladies, whats makes a guy come off as unapproachable to you? Just to be clear, I'm not talking about walking up and hitting on him, I'm talking about the typical smile or look from across the room. Well Ronin I'll tell you we as women are attentive and emotional creatures and must be handled in such a manner sometimes men forget that so just try to pay more attention next time.
Author Lonely Ronin Posted December 19, 2011 Author Posted December 19, 2011 The most beautiful vase can also house the deadliest scorpion. LOL, I am a Scorpio, and I have been told that my sting hurts.
Wolf18 Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 The most beautiful vase can also house the most beautiful flower. That's a good philosophy to have if you want to be a victim of a serial killer.
Nexus One Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 That's a good philosophy to have if you want to be a victim of a serial killer. Oh Wolf, you're such an optimist.
ShannonMI Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 Oh Wolf, you're such an optimist. Right? Hahahahahaha that's why I love him:love:
Pizzaman81 Posted December 20, 2011 Posted December 20, 2011 Not smiling Arms crossed Serious look on his face If you act/come across like this, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhXJcfczNIc In other words, appearing as though you are completely devoid of emotion. Eek! Yo! I'm starting to you like you... not you personally but your posts and how you reference movie scenes and youtube videos. I do that once in a while too. Props! Keep it exciting. P.S. Just kidding about not liking you personally... nothing.. uh personal.
counterman Posted December 20, 2011 Posted December 20, 2011 Let's see... I don't smile a lot. I always look serious. I'm lost in my own thoughts sometimes, which makes things awkward for others. So yeah, I guess I'm pretty unapproachable But I'll work on lightening up and bantering.
Wolf18 Posted December 20, 2011 Posted December 20, 2011 Right? Hahahahahaha that's why I love him:love: Oh Wolf, you're such an optimist. [/Quote] Maybe Nexus is right... So who wants to come down to my van for some free candy?
insertnamehere Posted December 20, 2011 Posted December 20, 2011 (edited) - If he has a lady at his side the whole time I'll take issue with this one for a particular reason. There are women who, especially in a bar or club settings, basically mark their territory and push up on a guy to lay down the whole "bitches better back off" when they like a guy. I had a married woman do this to me Friday night. I wanted no part of it. If you read my other posts, you know I'm not fond of women initiating anyhow. So, this was a lost cause on her part. But, if you weren't within a few feet of the conversation, I can't imagine how bad this looked. FTR, she was a long-time friend of the guys I was hanging out with. So, it wasn't an easy situation where I could just ditch her. Point being, you can't read too much into a woman being on a guy all night. Some people just have no dignity. Edited December 20, 2011 by insertnamehere
Lil1 Posted December 20, 2011 Posted December 20, 2011 I have also been in this situation before. I have to admit I found it to be very very irritating. I was at a restaurant for a friend's birthday not too long ago and a mutual acquaintance, someone I was recently introduced to, decided he would buddy up with me the entire friggin night! He literally followed me around the entire night. Some people even thought we were together which really bugged me. The thing is, he didnt really know anyone else there and I think my friend told him to hang out with me since I pretty much knew everyone and would introduce him to people. Which I did, but it was nevertheless annoying cause I wasnt in that frame of mind and there were a few guys I would have liked to flirt with but it just wasn't happening with him at my side the whole time! Well, I ended up playing nice and introduced him to a few people but he really did annoy me (non-stop talking about the weirdest things and was very socially awkward) so I ended up leaving early. As a female, I was just kind of stuck in this situation. My options would have been to: A. Tell the guy that I didn't feel like being bothered and come off as a mean biatch B. Tell my friend to tell her friend to be social on his own, which again would have made me look like a complete biatch C. Talk to guys and flirt with whoever I wanted to even with him at my side - which would have made me look like an inconsiderate/desperate hobag! So I agree with you that it's not always what it seems (i.e. a lady/man at your side doesn't automatically mean you are with them) however it does make you somewhat unapproachable to others who may be scoping you out for a date. I'm pretty sure that more guys would have talked to me that night if I didn't have Mr. acquaintance by my side the entire time!
insertnamehere Posted December 21, 2011 Posted December 21, 2011 I don't doubt it's harder to approach when someone is hanging on you. That's just basic social convention to not be a fifth wheel. I think the thread has certainly nailed the biggies about what makes guys unapproachable. Smiles, humor, friends all open a guy up better.
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