avb Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 Hey guys, so this is whats up..my ex broke up with me 6 months ago (we were together for 5 years)...I still have feelings for her and we do stay in contact..she just went on holidays for a month and on her last day she unexpectedly dropped by my work to say bye. Couple days later, she sends me a text saying I wish we could go back to how we used to be..i replied by saying nothing is preventing us from doing that...she replied by saying it will never be the same. She called me a few days later and we talked... these are the things preventing her from giving us another chance. 1) she feels my family hates her...and there will be too much baggage if we ever did get back together. 2) her parents dont want us together - different religious views/ and she feels if we get back together - she will be choosing me over her parents but she was like we broke up after 5 years..what if 5 years down the road we break up again? I will be left one nothing that day we talked about taking things slow... but than i recieved a test message from her...this was it word for word Honestly..like I said.. I don't want u to b waiting around.. So u do what u need to do.. Its not really about me needing timee to think ovr the holidays.. Its just that I know I can't commit to any1 right now and make em happy cuz I feel messed up inside. And I dunno when or how long it'll take for me to figure my **** out I don't want u waiting around and sitting on the sidelines. If u happy being in my life as a friend than that's awesome.. And if its something u can't do, than I understand as well.. U shud still see other ppl .. And explore options. We're still so young. And no1 can predict the future whats the best thing to do? I would love to get her back but whats the smartest way to do this. im soo confused.
mike588 Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 Hey guys, so this is whats up..my ex broke up with me 6 months ago (we were together for 5 years)...I still have feelings for her and we do stay in contact..she just went on holidays for a month and on her last day she unexpectedly dropped by my work to say bye. Couple days later, she sends me a text saying I wish we could go back to how we used to be..i replied by saying nothing is preventing us from doing that...she replied by saying it will never be the same. She called me a few days later and we talked... these are the things preventing her from giving us another chance. 1) she feels my family hates her...and there will be too much baggage if we ever did get back together. 2) her parents dont want us together - different religious views/ and she feels if we get back together - she will be choosing me over her parents but she was like we broke up after 5 years..what if 5 years down the road we break up again? I will be left one nothing that day we talked about taking things slow... but than i recieved a test message from her...this was it word for word Honestly..like I said.. I don't want u to b waiting around.. So u do what u need to do.. Its not really about me needing timee to think ovr the holidays.. Its just that I know I can't commit to any1 right now and make em happy cuz I feel messed up inside. And I dunno when or how long it'll take for me to figure my **** out I don't want u waiting around and sitting on the sidelines. If u happy being in my life as a friend than that's awesome.. And if its something u can't do, than I understand as well.. U shud still see other ppl .. And explore options. We're still so young. And no1 can predict the future whats the best thing to do? I would love to get her back but whats the smartest way to do this. im soo confused. I wouldn't give a rats ass about what her or your parents thought...it's not about them it's about the two of you!!!
wilsonx Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 gaslighting... and shes telling you to see other people... so do it....
mike588 Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 gaslighting... and shes telling you to see other people... so do it.... Exactly...do it.
JasonRules Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 Hey guys, so this is whats up..my ex broke up with me 6 months ago (we were together for 5 years)...I still have feelings for her and we do stay in contact..she just went on holidays for a month and on her last day she unexpectedly dropped by my work to say bye. Couple days later, she sends me a text saying I wish we could go back to how we used to be..i replied by saying nothing is preventing us from doing that...she replied by saying it will never be the same. She called me a few days later and we talked... these are the things preventing her from giving us another chance. 1) she feels my family hates her...and there will be too much baggage if we ever did get back together. 2) her parents dont want us together - different religious views/ and she feels if we get back together - she will be choosing me over her parents but she was like we broke up after 5 years..what if 5 years down the road we break up again? I will be left one nothing that day we talked about taking things slow... but than i recieved a test message from her...this was it word for word Honestly..like I said.. I don't want u to b waiting around.. So u do what u need to do.. Its not really about me needing timee to think ovr the holidays.. Its just that I know I can't commit to any1 right now and make em happy cuz I feel messed up inside. And I dunno when or how long it'll take for me to figure my **** out I don't want u waiting around and sitting on the sidelines. If u happy being in my life as a friend than that's awesome.. And if its something u can't do, than I understand as well.. U shud still see other ppl .. And explore options. We're still so young. And no1 can predict the future whats the best thing to do? I would love to get her back but whats the smartest way to do this. im soo confused. Your ex sounds like the typical confused basket case. Personally I would tell her to lose my number. You've probably made it clear you'll do anything to be with her again. She has the power and the control. This is NOT ATTRACTIVE to her because you're a sure thing. Do you think that if she had any romantic feelings for you, she would be telling you to go be with another woman? She almost sounds like your mother or a friend. Don't waste your time and energy on her. End all contact, delete her number, and start dating.
EgoJoe Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 I would tell her to take a long walk off of a short bridge. That is a sob story sell, I've heard it before.
BoredAgain Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 Both your parents and her parents aren't happy about the relationship, and this suddenly becomes a major problem for her five years down the line? I don't buy it, and neither should you. More likely the reason is because she feels "messed up inside" (as she says in her text) and clearly confused about what she wants. Just look at what she's saying -- she wants things to back how they were... but no, she doesn't feel the same... but maybe sometime in the future. Trying to get her back is a worthless task because she need to figure things out for herself (and this is exactly what she told you in the text). Best thing to do is to give her time and space. Do the "No Contact" thing if talking to her is causing you continued pain and confusion. Most importantly. take this as an opportunity to work on yourself, branch out, try new things, and meet new people.
Author avb Posted December 21, 2011 Author Posted December 21, 2011 Thanks everyone..I guess its time to go NC and move on:(
Author avb Posted December 21, 2011 Author Posted December 21, 2011 too top it all off..whatever she told me was bull****...just found out she starting a online dating profile on plenty of fish...all questions have been answered.
Zabs Posted December 21, 2011 Posted December 21, 2011 Sorry you are having to go through it...but now you're free do do what you want...any old time!!!! Enjoy yourself!! Much love Zabs
TearyEyedPride Posted December 21, 2011 Posted December 21, 2011 She's saying goodbye. She's going to miss you always being there and being her friend, she doesn't really wanna lose that part although she'll date other people and move on with her life. Ultimately though she's saying she can't be with you now and you should move on, but if you'll hang around and be strung along that's fine too.
WiseOne1 Posted December 21, 2011 Posted December 21, 2011 Sorry excuse, Girls live to defy there parents. If you were some no good jerk she wouldn't give a damn what her parents think.
69ways Posted December 21, 2011 Posted December 21, 2011 Hey guys, so this is whats up..my ex broke up with me 6 months ago (we were together for 5 years)...I still have feelings for her and we do stay in contact..she just went on holidays for a month and on her last day she unexpectedly dropped by my work to say bye. Couple days later, she sends me a text saying I wish we could go back to how we used to be..i replied by saying nothing is preventing us from doing that...she replied by saying it will never be the same. She called me a few days later and we talked... these are the things preventing her from giving us another chance. 1) she feels my family hates her...and there will be too much baggage if we ever did get back together. 2) her parents dont want us together - different religious views/ and she feels if we get back together - she will be choosing me over her parents but she was like we broke up after 5 years..what if 5 years down the road we break up again? I will be left one nothing that day we talked about taking things slow... but than i recieved a test message from her...this was it word for word Honestly..like I said.. I don't want u to b waiting around.. So u do what u need to do.. Its not really about me needing timee to think ovr the holidays.. Its just that I know I can't commit to any1 right now and make em happy cuz I feel messed up inside. And I dunno when or how long it'll take for me to figure my **** out I don't want u waiting around and sitting on the sidelines. If u happy being in my life as a friend than that's awesome.. And if its something u can't do, than I understand as well.. U shud still see other ppl .. And explore options. We're still so young. And no1 can predict the future whats the best thing to do? I would love to get her back but whats the smartest way to do this. im soo confused. Dumpers fk parents. Why do they always see positive and right to what they dumpers do? I had a better relationship with the father than what he had with his son but he did not mind closing the phone on me a when I called and did not even speak to me when he saw me. I would understand if I did something wrong.............But I did not......
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