SkyEmtRN Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 Has anyone ever took their ex for granted and had reconciliation? For example: They broke up with you They saw that you changed for the better becuase you learned from your mistakes They wanted you back Has anyone been in this position? If so please explain? I'm sure it will help other people on here including me. Thank you
mike588 Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 Has anyone ever took their ex for granted and had reconciliation? For example: They broke up with you They saw that you changed for the better becuase you learned from your mistakes They wanted you back Has anyone been in this position? If so please explain? I'm sure it will help other people on here including me. Thank you Real change has to come from within...not just saying it or pretending because eventually it will come out again. This also take time...you can't "prove" something to someone in a short amount of time.
ZimboGon Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 (edited) Mmm... For my recent ex that i've been whining about, she took me for granted completely, i was always there for her. buuuut, the one before her... Heh. I didn't care for her much. I was just too afraid to break up with her and put her out of her misery. She ended up breaking up with me. The second me and my last ex broke up a month ago, guess what? She contacted me. We had started talking, i apologized for how i acted and everything, and we caught up for the two year gap. After seeing how much i changed, she was willing to break-up with her current boyfriend to get back together with me. Of course, i didn't pursue that, but it had really shocked me how easily she could throw her boyfriend away to mess with me again after i treated her so horribly. But yeah, i didn't want her back. Someone else already has my heart, and even after she broke it she has it still... My ex before these two, i pretty much did the same thing. She asked me out, and i just went with it for the company. When everyone was so shocked to see us dating, and i learned about her... 'history' i was reluctant. We kept dating, until one day i was at the movies with friends and i told her i would text her later. After the movie, i turn on my phone and i have 9 texts from her freaking out because she has problems being alone and she feels sick without me talking to her. From that point i dramatically distanced myself, i didn't care for her enough to put up with that. Finally, she ended up breaking up with herself pretty much. However, with the time passed since then i could promise you that i could easily show up at her door and win her back. However, she got pregnant since then... while i was still in high school... so i can't say i would ever get near her door lol. Edited December 19, 2011 by ZimboGon
RatsAreCool Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 No but I've been on the side of the breaker upper without having any regrets and I can tell you what that's like. My ex before the person who put me on this site was a really, really wonderful guy, and he treated me really well. So I felt terribly guilty about the fact that I just couldn't feel the same way for him that he did for me. I finally got the courage to end it, and felt awful about it at first, like maybe I'd made a mistake... but it didn't take me long to realize I hadn't. Nine months later I still think about him a lot--every day in fact. But it's mostly to hope that he found someone else and is happy now. He and I were not right. And if your ex realizes that you and he/she are not right, there's nothing you can do about it except realize that if they feel that way then they're right--see what I mean? If they feel they're not right for you then you're not good together, no matter how you may feel about them. As much as it sucks... bleah. I'm sorry, this is probably not what you want to hear. But of course there are also plenty of examples of people missing each other and getting back together. Most of my friends have done it. So... Most of them probably won't be on this site though so you're going to get a lot of biased information.
chados Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 why cant you just listen to what people has to say. youre fishing for hope. no one here can tell you if she's going to come back. im not sure your ex even knows that at this point. the mistake your doing is by contacting her when you shouldnt. i can tell you this. the only time "no matter if i was the dumper or the dumpee" an ex havent reached out to me after the breakup was when i chased her. sure this is different from relationship to relationship. no matter what people tell you her. im almost certain that if the relationship was good. and if your playing your cards right, theres a big chance of reconciliation. of course that is if theres still strong memories and feelings left. because thats something you cant change. your improvements shouldnt be obvious to her. with that said. dont tell her that youve changed. this is something she should discover herself no matter if it takes 1 month or 1 year. she should realize what she's missing out on herself, because else it just gonna look like youre changing because she told you to. give her time to miss you. she will check up on you, trust me on this. even if you block her on facebook or aim, she will check up on you in some other way. especially if your not contacting her!! you said earlier that youre doing fine. but your not. you dont have any control at all of the situation. you dont have enough distance to make her miss you. a breakup is a tough decision to make, thats why its a tough decision to get back together. im guessing youre still in contact. well tell her that you feel like this isnt working out anymore. and stand your ground, tell her that what you wrote earlier about no contact is probably for the best right now.
chados Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 No but I've been on the side of the breaker upper without having any regrets and I can tell you what that's like. My ex before the person who put me on this site was a really, really wonderful guy, and he treated me really well. So I felt terribly guilty about the fact that I just couldn't feel the same way for him that he did for me. I finally got the courage to end it, and felt awful about it at first, like maybe I'd made a mistake... but it didn't take me long to realize I hadn't. Nine months later I still think about him a lot--every day in fact. But it's mostly to hope that he found someone else and is happy now. He and I were not right. And if your ex realizes that you and he/she are not right, there's nothing you can do about it except realize that if they feel that way then they're right--see what I mean? If they feel they're not right for you then you're not good together, no matter how you may feel about them. As much as it sucks... bleah. I'm sorry, this is probably not what you want to hear. But of course there are also plenty of examples of people missing each other and getting back together. Most of my friends have done it. So... Most of them probably won't be on this site though so you're going to get a lot of biased information. not saying that you didnt made the right decision. but people these days really have a hard time working on their relationships. especially if theyre young. there no such thing as honeymoonstage years after a relationship started. and people are still looking for that.
Author SkyEmtRN Posted December 19, 2011 Author Posted December 19, 2011 I'm not fishing for anything. I'm trying to get awayy from my ex without doing it in a dirtbag way possible but she keeps contacting me in some shape or form. I'm trying to get closer to someone else or atleast have someone in mind. She texts and starts stuff up. Ands it's in my blood to have the last word....it's a Spanish thing....at this point I don't think I want to be with her she been causing more stress and makes up bs excuses to hate me.
chados Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 I'm not fishing for anything. I'm trying to get awayy from my ex without doing it in a dirtbag way possible but she keeps contacting me in some shape or form. I'm trying to get closer to someone else or atleast have someone in mind. She texts and starts stuff up. Ands it's in my blood to have the last word....it's a Spanish thing....at this point I don't think I want to be with her she been causing more stress and makes up bs excuses to hate me. why would she contact you if she hates you? doesnt make sense. why would you post something like this if you dont want her back? denial.. even if you dont love her you want some kind of sign that she wants you back. your not a dirthbag for moving on. she told "you" that she doesnt want you.. how does that make you a dirthbag for not contacting her? if youre trying to get away from her, not contacting her would be the most obvious way right? you had the last word when you told her that this was the best thing to do at this point.
mike588 Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 You want her back? Listen to what people are telling you!! Contact= Push her further away No Contact= Best chance to get her back...she may miss you.
Author SkyEmtRN Posted December 19, 2011 Author Posted December 19, 2011 Lol I try n I try. All I want is for her to just shut the fu*k up lol.
mike588 Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 Lol I try n I try. All I want is for her to just shut the fu*k up lol. Quit trying it and do it! You want her to shut up...well ignore her calls..texts..other..eventually she'll get the hint.
chados Posted December 19, 2011 Posted December 19, 2011 yes, in the long run it will be even harder for you to move on if youre contacting her, and it probably ruin your chances to ever get her back.
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