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Men: Can a woman start to look better to you once you begin developing feelings?

Ruby Slippers

By Ruby Slippers
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Ruby Slippers Established Member

Ruby Slippers

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Just something I've been thinking about. I know that my physical attraction skyrockets as my admiration and respect for the man and his interior qualities grow.

 

I'd like to hear the guys' thoughts on this. :)

dasein Established Member

dasein

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Yes, I dated a woman with a giant, ripply ass and huge thunder thighs for a couple months. The rest of her from the waist up looked great. She was a holy terror in the sack, so ended up not minding her giant ass so much. She dumped me for a gay sous chef with a cross fetish for women with giant asses who would feed her lots of nice meals in hope that her ass would get even bigger. Of course I couldn't compete with a match like that. Who knows what their sex life ended up being, probably something truly unique and startling. Sometimes years later I still think of that giant, ripply ass and shed a tear of nostalgia.

carhill Established Member

carhill

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I covered some of this aspect in another thread. All of my life interactions with women have begun from a place of neutrality. My assessments may vary but attraction at a personal level build over time. I have enough data points clearly showing this style that I can comfortably view it as a natural style of interaction. Is it common? Perhaps not. It is, however, just as valid as any other style.

 

This style is why, save for once our M degenerated from a loving relationship, I never really found other women attractive while I was married. All the energy and interest which fuels that attraction was focused on my M. That process was also a sign that my love in the M had ended because I began to grow attraction from interactions with other women. It was a canary.

 

Obviously YMMV and apparently, on LS, this viewpoint is outlier. I'm good with that.

thatone Established Member

thatone

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Yes, I dated a woman with a giant, ripply ass and huge thunder thighs for a couple months. The rest of her from the waist up looked great. She was a holy terror in the sack, so ended up not minding her giant ass so much. She dumped me for a gay sous chef with a cross fetish for women with giant asses who would feed her lots of nice meals in hope that her ass would get even bigger. Of course I couldn't compete with a match like that. Who knows what their sex life ended up being, probably something truly unique and startling. Sometimes years later I still think of that giant, ripply ass and shed a tear of nostalgia.

 

/winner

 

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jobaba Established Member

jobaba

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Just something I've been thinking about. I know that my physical attraction skyrockets as my admiration and respect for the man and his interior qualities grow.

 

I'd like to hear the guys' thoughts on this. :)

 

Yes.

 

I fell for this woman this year after getting to know everything about her and for a while I thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world. Like I would have taken her over Jessica Alba. I could not stop looking at her pictures on Facebook. Even the bad ones seemed good.

 

I mean, she was generally pretty, but I knew she wasn't 'all that' because some of the guys we knew mutually said she was unattractive. I also showed her pics to my friends who never met her without the backstory who said she was "OK", and "Not bad".

 

So I'm pretty sure it was all in my head. And we didn't even date. She rejected me. But the feelings were there. ;)

 

If you assure me you're nowhere near the NYC Metro area, maybe I'll consider PMing you a photo. Lol.

Edited by jobaba
orion1010 Established Member

orion1010

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YES.. the more I like a guy, the more attractive he is. ;)

FitChick Established Member

FitChick

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There is a wonderful old black and white film, The Enchanted Cottage, starring Robert Young. If you can find it, watch it. It addresses the phenomenon of someone becoming more beautiful as you grow to love them.

Eternal Sunshine Established Member

Eternal Sunshine

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I think that's what happened with my boyfriend. He keeps telling me that I look more beutiful than when he met me (objectively I probably don't). He has also recently started randomly kissing little bits of cellulite at the back of my legs :sick::love:

lemonlegs Established Member

lemonlegs

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He has also recently started randomly kissing little bits of cellulite at the back of my legs :sick::love:

 

.. that's not even romantic... that's just weird.

Disenchantedly Yours Established Member

Disenchantedly Yours

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.. that's not even romantic... that's just weird.

 

What would you rather he do? Slap the cellulite, watch it jiggle then say "daammmn B*tch, you better do something about that." Or should he "tastefully" ignore it while he jerks off to pictures of women with perfectly photoshopped or make up covered thighs?

xxoo Established Member

xxoo

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"Love is a great beautifier." Louisa May Alcott.

 

As true for men as it is for women :)

Wolf18 Established Member

Wolf18

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The only girl I've ever loved had huge scars all over her body from wounds that she never got treated, I thought her body was beautiful anyway and anyone who makes a big deal about things like that is no good (funny, the guy who she picked over me would always make comments about it and told her she should get some surgery to have them removed :rolleyes:).

 

However that cellulite comment is weird :lmao: I find DY's notion that men should actively worship the physical flaws of women to be considered a good person, to be absurd. I hope you're ready to worship my narrow shoulders and my somewhat below average height, in that case, but I doubt that, this idea that everyones body should be accepted as beautiful only applies to women :rolleyes:.

betterdeal Established Member

betterdeal

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Most definitely. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder is definitely true for me. With the most recent woman I was involved with, when things were going well she looked stunning to me. When not, she looked positively ugly.

 

I like to think that as you get to know someone well enough you see the inner them more and more.

thehead Established Member

thehead

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Without a doubt. Some friends weren't too impressed by my last girlfriend-they let that slip-but I thought-and still think-she's beautiful. Heart matters for a lot.

Dusk1983 Established Member

Dusk1983

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What would you rather he do? Slap the cellulite, watch it jiggle then say "daammmn B*tch, you better do something about that." Or should he "tastefully" ignore it while he jerks off to pictures of women with perfectly photoshopped or make up covered thighs?

 

Why does it have to be either/or?

 

I usually slap my gf's cellulite, watch it jiggle then say "daammmn B*tch, you better do something about that" ALL WHILE jerking off to pictures of women with perfectly photoshopped or makeup covered thighs.

 

Believe it when I say 2011 is all about multitasking.

Wolf18 Established Member

Wolf18

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Funny how all the uppity hoes on this forum will make 10 page threads about guys like me ruin this forum by being "bitter" , yet there are just as many "bitter" women who make men out to be Al Bundy from married with children.

DeusExMachina Member

DeusExMachina

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Just something I've been thinking about. I know that my physical attraction skyrockets as my admiration and respect for the man and his interior qualities grow.

 

I'd like to hear the guys' thoughts on this. :)

 

Absolutely! When I was last 'in love' I would hardly notice other women and woke up everyday next to the most beautiful women everyday (in my eyes). Sick, tired, angry, etc she was always amazing. As a found my love fade for her, I barely noticed her anymore. You have to be attracted to someone by more then just looks to have a meaningful relationship. If it is just based on looks then just keep it a FWB deal, it will most likely last longer.

Andy_K Established Member

Andy_K

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Just something I've been thinking about. I know that my physical attraction skyrockets as my admiration and respect for the man and his interior qualities grow.

 

I'd like to hear the guys' thoughts on this. :)

 

Alright, looks like I'm the shallowest guy on the forums :D

 

My answer is 'no', or 'very little'. Physical attraction for me changes very little as I develop feelings. If it starts high it stays high. If it starts mediocre it doesn't get much higher.

 

I accept myself fully the way I am :laugh:

Necromancer Established Member

Necromancer

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I once meet a girl she was probably 2 years older than me,at first i found her nothing special but after like 2 min of conversation i found her dead sexy!

 

But it has only happened once,in normal cases the personality does not become to a physical attraction.

 

The girls that i find funny and fun to hang around are my female friends and will never become more than that because i don´t want anything more from them,lame that its that way..... :o

oaks Established Member

oaks

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Just something I've been thinking about. I know that my physical attraction skyrockets as my admiration and respect for the man and his interior qualities grow.

 

I'd like to hear the guys' thoughts on this. :)

 

By the time my admiration and respect for her and her interior qualities has grown then, overall, my attraction to her increases. It's hard to say whether my physical attraction increases - I'm not sure I can separate how much I'm attracted into a column of "physical attraction" and another column of "other attraction".

 

Objectively I know she isn't physically more attractive (unless she changed into nicer clothes, did something different with her make-up or hair etc), but attraction doesn't have to be objective or logical, of course. :)

Edited by oaks
Nexus One Established Member

Nexus One

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Men: Can a woman start to look better to you once you begin developing feelings?

 

Yes, this has been a consistent thing in my experience. Once I start crushing on a girl/woman after I get to know her personality, then her looks start irradiating more intensely, I start to see more beauty in her appearance. She then becomes more beautiful in my eyes as opposed to the time frame before the feelings.

Ninjainpajamas Established Member

Ninjainpajamas

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I've dated some beauties and it was never hard to be attracted and into them...

 

And then I've dated some uglies, I've always been a guy who digs deeper so I always became attracted to the person based on how I felt for them.

 

I also had a gf who gained a fairly large amount of weight during our relationship, but nothing drastic changed in my eyes (yes i I still noticed) I still saw her the same as before, yet If I had met her this way prior I would have been turned off.

EnigmaticClarity Established Member

EnigmaticClarity

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Yes, this has been a consistent thing in my experience. Once I start crushing on a girl/woman after I get to know her personality, then her looks start irradiating more intensely, I start to see more beauty in her appearance. She then becomes more beautiful in my eyes as opposed to the time frame before the feelings.

 

That's because once you love someone, you start to look right past their flaws and only see their beauty. It's what makes love a wondrous thing. :)

betterdeal Established Member

betterdeal

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Alcohol has the same effect.

 

Drop your inhibitions and the beauty within others shines through.

Feelin Frisky Established Member

Feelin Frisky

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Yes, absolutely. I can remember many times being around certain women and not realizing that they do anything for me at all and then one day it all changes and somehow I feel this is the most gorgeous thing in the universe. But infatutation aside, I've also been almost automatic in over-looking physical shortfalls in the women whom I'm actually gotten into relationships with and tend to think of them in the most flattering lights when I'm not in their presence. How unattractive anyone else might deem her becomes a non-consideration when I think of her as my love.

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