Fresh into a breakup, is it wrong to say "I miss you" or something similar?

[Standard-Fare]

When a breakup is very fresh, and it's clear both of you are suffering equally, is it totally wrong to want to reach out to the other person? Not to get them back, not to change the outcome, but to just acknowledge your shared pain and that you're in each other's thoughts?

 

In my case: It's only a few days in, we broke up due to an external reason (marijuana addiction, to be precise), neither of us wanted the breakup but saw that it was inevitable. And we both acknowledged that it was among the hardest things we've been through in life.

 

So is it wrong for me to want to send a text that says something like innocuous, like: "This absolutely blows. I want you to know that you're in my thoughts, and I hope you're finding some peace of mind."

 

Let me be clear that I know he won't respond, he's not the type. I really do just want to extend some comfort, and recognize that we're both in a world of hell right now that only the other understands.

 

I understand that this type of thing would be detrimental deeper into the separation, when we're both further along in our grieving processes. But now, yeah, we're definitely thinking of each other and it blows -- is it so wrong to acknowledge it?

[BoredAgain]

If you're truly not doing it to, as you say, "get them back" or "change the outcome" (and as long as you're not expecting any response back), I don't see it as a huge deal. I guess my only concern would be, why? What's the point of the text?

 

You say that you "just want to extend some comfort" but are you really the best person to be doing that right now?

[mike588]

Your breaking up because he smokes weed? What else is going on?