Cant stop thinking about her, im lost in the world

[no_clue]

I cant stop thinking about this woman i had a fling with for a couple months, im only 19 she was 26. She had three kids younger than 7 years old, and a husband that was deployed overseas in the war. We were just friends with benefits at first then we fell in love. I stayed at her house all the time, i even got fired from my job because i was absent and tardy messing with her. A couple weeks ago she found out her husband had to return from the war and is being kicked out of the army. That was the reason I left. While he was gone i spent money on us and she did to until it stopped coming from her husband. She was angry with him and was not happy about him coming back. Her husband knew i was there and was ok with it, he didnt know i was there 24/7 with his kids though. She told me it was more of a contract marriage for the money and kids. When he came back i went home to my moms house. She told me she would stay in touch and i would still see her. She said she would call me because she shares the phone with her husband. Since he came back she deleted and blocked me from facebook and doesnt call. I think she lied to me the whole time though and they really are together romantically he just didnt care about her having a fwb. I can get in touch with her through her one friend still but she just wants to be friends now. I understand and am ok with it because her life just changed with her husband getting kicked out they will be moving back to their hometown at the end of the year. I spent the last two months completely dedicated to her and now I have no money, Im in debt to the bank i have bills to pay. My mom is moving far away and my dad lives far already. I have to stay here where all my friends are but have no money, job, car to do so. Basically i miss her like crazy she was the most mature woman ive been with and she helped me grow up a little bit. We were contemplating what would happen when he got back i figured she would go with him but i told her if i got my own place she was welcome and her kids, she really considered it but i knew she would end up staying with him mostly for the kids and financial. I kind of wanted her to stay with me but she has so many problems in life and crazy children. She even told me she had to much baggage and i should move on. I dont even know why im writing i just sad and crying tonight. We had alot of great times, tried new things, i would take pills and get mad at her for no reason than beg her to forgive me, we would cry with each other and i think we were really in love. I want to win her heart back but i know her husband would probably be furious since im trying to break up his family. I told her ill always love her forever and she said it too why am i still attached to her and sad in my heart it was only a couple months and i still want her back

[leoc1973]

Normally I would say shame on you for messing with a woman while her husband was off suffering for this country. I think they call you Jodi! but in this case I think this chick really had you fooled. I think she really convinced you that she was in a loveless marriage and it was for the kids but she just used you to pass the time. I am sure her husband didn't know much of anything. You are young so it hurts a lot more than it should. You do not want a girl with that kind of baggage at your age. Go out have fun with your friends and find a young girl to fall in love with. you seem like a good kid that was dooped. Get in school go to the gym make something of your life cause this girl is just gonna put you in a hole you can't get out of.

 

I am sure you think that the sex will never be that great again but trust me they pretty much all know what they are doing. This girl probably has no emotional attachment to you at all. Sorry I know you don't wanna hear it but she made you lose your job. She doesn't care about you at all! She is a user get away stop thinking about her and move on! Good luck man I hope you don't hurt for too long.