Are these Breadcrumbs

[BrokenFool]

Hey All

Long story short - got dumped by my either narcistic/BPD ex a year ago now, no explanation, no chance for discussion just dumped me via text then disappeared , ignored all my calls and texts and emails, i begged for 3 weeks then walked away

She told me in that last conversation via text im with somebody else now , i asked does he make you happier than i did she said yes

i left it at that as in a sense it gave me a sense of closure - all throughout the relationship she had lied, stayed in touch with a ex, had late night calls, disappeared for nights and said flu medication had knocked her out, dumped me every 6 weeks so to finally hear from the horses mouth that she had some body else was a relief

 

Now heres the problem

About 4 months after we broke up i started getting unknown calls - now yes i could say this is anybody , work , agencies, telemarketeers etc so didnt let it trouble me, although having had this mobile number for 9 years i had never received such calls and on one day before 10am i had SEVEN unknown calls with the earliest being 07.56 and every half an hour after that - thats no company or work or friend so i felt it was her

and over the months they have come sometimes just 1 or 2 a month

sometimes like in august 15 calls

one time in september i decided to finally answer and put to bed in my heart who it was

i answered said my name whoever it was listened and then put the phone down

this was september the 1st - from then silence

October - silence

then in November things have got stranger

 

i got a facebook friends request from somebody i didnt know, whom had my next door neighbour as a mutual friend, the profile was quite vague 12 friends nothing on the wall, no photos etc so before i accepted i went to see the neighbour and said whos this person on your facebook shes sent me a friends request - he said i have no idea who it is, she added me so i sent her a message saying whos this and she didnt reply - from that moment i felt it was my ex so declined her request - that profile has since been deleted by whoever set it up

I then got two weird texts

 

one said

hey is this BrokenFool from Match.com..... now ive never been on match.com and my ex had said to me once she felt i had a profile on there so i clicked straightaway this was my ex, also the ..... at the end of the text gave her away because thats her writing style

 

the second text said

cxxe

 

i didnt respond to neither

 

i then got missed calls from a number i didnt recognise - i asked my nephew to check the number as he works at a phone shop and it was a pay as you go number registered a few weeks back earlier to a name with the same initials as my ex

 

and now the spookiest part

in the last 3 weeks i have changed my facebook profile pic 3 times - my ex deleted me from facebook and blocked me and i havent changed the pics for her

however after each time i have changed it within an hour or two i have had a private number call and a anonymous view on my linkedin profile, once this happened within 20 minutes of changing my facebook pic

 

so my question to you guys is and especially if wilson or smokey bear could chirp in i would really appreciate it

i am ignoring her , have broken 1 time in a whole year and dont want to be back with her

however i am 99% sure these private number calls every time i change my facebook pic and the other stuff is my ex

 

so my question is WHY is she doing this

according to her phone bills she is enjoying everyday late night chats with a 21 year old (shes 32) across the road - so either she is going out with him or extremely fond of him and he is taking up her time

so WHY is she going to the trouble of letting me know she has seen my facebook profile pic or going to the shop and buying a sim card to text me from it

 

WHY is she doing this

Whats going through her mind

 

Breadcrumbs, GIGS ?????

 

I could really do with your advice guys because although its not troubling me it is taking up space in my mind and causing me to be anxious

Thanks

[silly_panda]

If you don't wan her back, all these things shouldn't bother you and you won't go through all the trouble in asking your neighbour about the facebook thing and also asking your nephew to check the number...

[BrokenFool]

It's not a case of do want her back or don't want her back , I don't think a relationship between us would work as she has not the commitment or love for me to make effort or be loving towards me however we broke up over nothing concrete and more Mia communication and ????s so I would like to feel that she is thinking about me and hence these games

That's why I am asking and I will be honest if she changed her ways then I can see my future with her I would like some responses

[BrokenFool]

or is my hurt and opinions worth less than others on here

so many views yet ONE response

can anybody not shed some light on my post

wilson ? smokey? anyone ?

[smokey bear]

or is my hurt and opinions worth less than others on here

so many views yet ONE response

can anybody not shed some light on my post

wilson ? smokey? anyone ?

 

 

You dont have any solid facts that this is your ex, if your ex was txting you, or calling you and you knew it was her and she was looking for friendship etc id say go for it, make some kind of move.

 

But you dont have any solid facts that its her.

 

Options....

 

Change your number and make your fb strictly private and un searchable.

 

If you still have a phone number for her, phone her and see where it gets you.

 

but it doesnt sound like any form of breadcrumbs, it does sound like someoe is playing a game with you but maybe a friend or family.

 

Its been a year, a mighty long time........

 

Also you mentioned her ex, when an ex is involved i honestly think you never have a chance again.

 

Sorry.

 

If it bothers you that much phone her and see if you can be friends, otherwise change your number and block your facebook and move on.

 

It really isnt a solid case to give any advice.

[CaliBabe]

If it's her or not, who cares. She ripped your heart out so callously. Let her suffer.

[selena_cat]

I know curiosity kills the cat,it doesnt matter if she tried to reach you via smoke signal. It doesnt mean she wants to get back with you. Plus why would you want to be with someone dishonest. meaybe thinking she calls somehow validates you,thinking maybe she cares,that your not that forgettable. It is understandable you feel this way,however with a person like her it really doesnt matter

[BrokenFool]

Thanks for your input guys

I know it's not my friends or family like I said I don't give my number out often and have had this number for 9 years ,

I know it's her

She's made it obvious

And I will be honest I am thinking a year later she's giving me unknown calls I feel validated that my love meant something to her

But why is she doing this ?

What she hoping to achieve

If I contacted her without opening up and saying I miss her , I love her and want her back she will ignore my calls/texts or if she picks up she won't be honest that it is her behind all this stuff

I guess I am just going to let it pan out

If she feels anything for me then she knows where to find me

I think her GIGS is coming to an end and she is having regrets

Plus this is the month we broke up so maybe sentiment comes into it

I don't know

That's why I needed opinions from the lovely people on here because it is causing me anxiety

[smokey bear]

Thanks for your input guys

I know it's not my friends or family like I said I don't give my number out often and have had this number for 9 years ,

I know it's her

She's made it obvious

And I will be honest I am thinking a year later she's giving me unknown calls I feel validated that my love meant something to her

But why is she doing this ?

What she hoping to achieve

If I contacted her without opening up and saying I miss her , I love her and want her back she will ignore my calls/texts or if she picks up she won't be honest that it is her behind all this stuff

I guess I am just going to let it pan out

If she feels anything for me then she knows where to find me

I think her GIGS is coming to an end and she is having regrets

Plus this is the month we broke up so maybe sentiment comes into it

I don't know

That's why I needed opinions from the lovely people on here because it is causing me anxiety

 

 

Well if its causing you anxiety i suggest you break nc and lay your cards on the table, all she can do is say no at which point all this will end and you can move on rather than continue as you are.