What does it mean when women call you "Intense"

[Wolf18]

I can't tell if it's a good or bad thing, it has certainly been used in a variety of contexts regards to myself but I've yet to crack its actually meaning. I've had women who were attracted and unattracted to me use it.

[Cypress25]

It usually has a negative connotation. If someone is too intense, it means they take everything too seriously, they don't laugh or joke around much, it's difficult for them to relax and be lighthearted.

[lululucy]

If I said that, I'd probably mean that your personality and opinions came across very strong, perhaps bordering on overwhelming. I know three or four people I'd catagorise as 'intense' but I don't know that I would be attracted to them. A strong personality is an asset and having opinions/being assertive is also positive but those I think of when I think of 'intense' are people with whom I can barely have a discussion sometimes because they shut down my opinion (if it disagrees with theirs) before I've even said it.

[snug.bunny]

It could mean you have a strong personality.

[Wolf18]

Interesting.

 

Could it also be used for a male who moves too fast?

 

Sometimes I feel that sexually I make a move too fast with women. While this may be a bit of an exagerration, when I am seeing a girl I always get the feeling that my time with her is finite and feel pressured to make a movie when I see any kind of door open up, even if it's a tiny little doggy door lol. Sometimes it works with flying colors, but other times it gets me a slap

 

The last female "friend" I had months back, I was making out with her and about to have intercourse with her only to have her push me off last minute and say "I don't even know how you got me into bed and my clothes are off, you're intense". We were both sober btw, so its not like we were drunk.

Edited December 10, 2011 by Wolf18

[lululucy]

Interesting.

 

Could it also be used for a male who moves too fast?

 

Sometimes I feel that sexually I make a move too fast with women. While this may be a bit of an exagerration, when I am seeing a girl I always get the feeling that my time with her is finite and feel pressured to make a movie when I see any kind of door open up, even if it's a tiny little doggy door lol. Sometimes it works with flying colors, but other times it gets me a slap

 

The last female "friend" I had months back, I was making out with her and about to have intercourse with her only to have her push me off last minute and say "I don't even know how you got me into bed and my clothes are off, you're intense". We were both sober btw, so its not like we were drunk.

 

I personally wouldn't use it to reference moving too fast, although she could have been referring to your personality being able to overwhelm her into doing something she wasn't intending on doing? I would only use intense in that way if I was trying to clearly say "SLOW DOWN DUDE".

[O'Malley]

Strong opinions, undivided attention, focus -- it can be attractive if it's balanced out with some self awareness, humor and debate. Being intense doesn't necessarily mean that you aren't humorous or laid back at times, but that it's those qualities aren't noticed right off of the bat when people interact with you.

 

A downside to all of this is the perception that an intense sort can't or won't think outside of the box, or take into consideration a different perspective. I've known a few intense types that just don't like to compromise.

 

I would only use intense in that way if I was trying to clearly say "SLOW DOWN DUDE".

 

The above. I'd consider a guy intense if I perceived that he had a need to have all the nails hammered in right away, sexually or emotionally.

[MaxNoob]

I know a millionaire who's Wikipedia page describes him as intense. He tends to raise his voice in any conversation in an effort to sound as spectacular as possible. We could just be talking about stocks, and he'll start yelling. He's very entertaining, but it would be exhausting to spend a whole day with him.

[Wolf18]

Strong opinions, undivided attention, focus -- it can be attractive if it's balanced out with some self awareness, humor and debate. Being intense doesn't necessarily mean that you aren't humorous or laid back at times, but that it's those qualities aren't noticed right off of the bat when people interact with you.[/Quote]

 

 

Yes I've heard people say that about me, that when they talk to me it feels like they have my undivided attention and I'm good at talking to people, but then they turn around and say I'm an arrogant jerk because I laugh at certain opinions I deem lame (such as christians who don't believe in Hell, only different levels of heaven ). I generally try to respect other political or religious opinions though, as long as it isn't the typical cookie cutter rinse-repeat philosophy/views people get from TV.

 

 

personally wouldn't use it to reference moving too fast, although she could have been referring to your personality being able to overwhelm her into doing something she wasn't intending on doing? I would only use intense in that way if I was trying to clearly say "SLOW DOWN DUDE". [/Quote]

 

Yes, I still don't understand. I have had quite a few girls describe me as intense in these situations in my life, where we go to bed and then whether I succeed or not am called "intense". Does that mean I am fervent in my pursuit? Wouldn't a woman take that as a compliment

[Wolf18]

I know a millionaire who's Wikipedia page describes him as intense. He tends to raise his voice in any conversation in an effort to sound as spectacular as possible. We could just be talking about stocks, and he'll start yelling. He's very entertaining, but it would be exhausting to spend a whole day with him.

 

LOL. I hope that's not what they mean

[veggirl]

When I think intense, I think kinda scary, unstable, aggressive.

[Cypress25]

I have had quite a few girls describe me as intense in these situations in my life, where we go to bed and then whether I succeed or not am called "intense". Does that mean I am fervent in my pursuit? Wouldn't a woman take that as a compliment

 

In this case, it could mean that you are so intensely focused on the end goal (sex) that you forget to savor the experience along the way (kissing, foreplay, etc). I wouldn't think of it as a compliment in every situation. Sometimes women like slow and sensual, and they appreciate it when the man takes his time and makes sure the woman is enjoying it as well. Intense can mean you have tunnel vision; you block out everything else and focus exclusively on getting to sex as fast as possible.

[Soxfaninfl]

I've been call intense also. My previous GF liked it. I talked about my feelings all the time. I'm a person talk asks women how they feel all the time about things and ask ask them how it made them feel wah I said. I'm layed back person, but I like to move fast in a relationship. My current GF says that we were moving too fast. My counselor said I need to talk it slow too.

[Wolf18]

When I think intense, I think kinda scary, unstable, aggressive.

 

 

This is very possible.

 

In this case, it could mean that you are so intensely focused on the end goal (sex) that you forget to savor the experience along the way (kissing, foreplay, etc). I wouldn't think of it as a compliment in every situation. Sometimes women like slow and sensual, and they appreciate it when the man takes his time and makes sure the woman is enjoying it as well. Intense can mean you have tunnel vision; you block out everything else and focus exclusively on getting to sex as fast as possible[/Quote]

 

 

No way, I actually enjoy kissing and foreplay as much as a woman would to be honest.

 

I've been call intense also. My previous GF liked it. I talked about my feelings all the time. I'm a person talk asks women how they feel all the time about things and ask ask them how it made them feel wah I said. I'm layed back person, but I like to move fast in a relationship. My current GF says that we were moving too fast. My counselor said I need to talk it slow too. [/Quote]

 

 

Counselors are for sissies, do what your instincts tell you as they are the purest inspiration you will find.

 

-UH oh, was that sentence "intense"

[snug.bunny]

Interesting.

 

Could it also be used for a male who moves too fast?

 

Sometimes I feel that sexually I make a move too fast with women. While this may be a bit of an exagerration, when I am seeing a girl I always get the feeling that my time with her is finite and feel pressured to make a movie when I see any kind of door open up, even if it's a tiny little doggy door lol. Sometimes it works with flying colors, but other times it gets me a slap

 

The last female "friend" I had months back, I was making out with her and about to have intercourse with her only to have her push me off last minute and say "I don't even know how you got me into bed and my clothes are off, you're intense". We were both sober btw, so its not like we were drunk.

 

Well, yes. But if you're both sober, and reach a point where you are making out naked on a bed together, then you are both willing participants. It doesn't sound like you're forcing yourself onto anyone based on what you described, but rather, things are getting heated between the two of you physically. So in that context, "you're intense" means you're exhibiting sexually passionate behavior towards them, which appears to be reciprocated, to a degree.

[The Tiger]

Judging by your quarrel in the Ashton Kutcher thread, intense is a euphemism for pompous *******.

[Wolf18]

Well, yes. But if you're both sober, and reach a point where you are making out naked on a bed together, then you are both willing participants. It doesn't sound like you're forcing yourself onto anyone based on what you described, but rather, things are getting heated between the two of you physically. So in that context, "you're intense" means you're exhibiting sexually passionate behavior towards them, which appears to be reciprocated, to a degree.

 

Yes, this has been happening to me lately, women getting my engine revved up then backing out at the last minute because they suddenly remembered some unattainable guy they see once in a blue moon who they call "boyfriend" (but he isn't aware that he is her boyfriend).

 

 

 

Judging by your quarrel in the Ashton Kutcher thread, intense is a euphemism for pompous *******. [/Quote]

 

You can get it in Aisle 9: http://www.pinkapple.com/productphotos/2001_large.jpg

[snug.bunny]

Yes, this has been happening to me lately, women getting my engine revved up then backing out at the last minute because they suddenly remembered some unattainable guy they see once in a blue moon who they call "boyfriend" (but he isn't aware that he is her boyfriend).

 

 

 

 

 

You can get it in Aisle 9: http://www.pinkapple.com/productphotos/2001_large.jpg

 

If she's mentioning her "boyfriend" as the reason things stop when things get hot and heavy between the two of you physically, then she is cheating on her boyfriend. If you suspect that she is stopping things from going all the way because she is dating or is interested in someone else, well, that kind of needs to be addressed first.

 

Sometimes women just aren't ready yet to go all the way, and there can be a multitude of reasons why. Some of them can include, she's not interested in having sex with you, she's not sure if you're going to sleep with her and then bolt the next day (i.e. used), she's not at that point yet emotionally to have intercourse with you, she's multidating/sleeping with someone else, she's afraid she will come across as a "slut, she wants to continue exploring each other's bodies sexually/making out versus going all the way, she's a Virgin, she has an STD, being on her mensies, she's not on birth control, she's religious and wants to save herself for marriage.

[Cypress25]

Yes, this has been happening to me lately, women getting my engine revved up then backing out at the last minute because they suddenly remembered some unattainable guy they see once in a blue moon who they call "boyfriend" (but he isn't aware that he is her boyfriend).

 

Is that the real reason, or are you just making wild assumptions? Maybe she's just not ready to have sex yet, sheesh. As snug.bunny said, there are a million reasons why a woman might want to delay sex.

[Wolf18]

If she's mentioning her "boyfriend" as the reason things stop when things get hot and heavy between the two of you physically, then she is cheating on her boyfriend. If you suspect that she is stopping things from going all the way because she is dating or is interested in someone else, well, that kind of needs to be addressed first.

 

Sometimes women just aren't ready yet to go all the way, and there can be a multitude of reasons why. Some of them can include, she's not interested in having sex with you, she's not sure if you're going to sleep with her and then bolt the next day (i.e. used), she's not at that point yet emotionally to have intercourse with you, she's multidating/sleeping with someone else, she's afraid she will come across as a "slut, she wants to continue exploring each other's bodies sexually/making out versus going all the way, she's a Virgin, she has an STD, being on her mensies, she's not on birth control, she's religious and wants to save herself for marriage. [/Quote]

 

Is that the real reason, or are you just making wild assumptions? Maybe she's just not ready to have sex yet, sheesh. As snug.bunny said, there are a million reasons why a woman might want to delay sex.

 

 

The last few cases have been some guy who sees these girls 1 time a month for what is essentially a booty call, then when I come into the picture and see I'm not just another "friend" they stop taking these girls for granted and put in a little effort to keep stringing the girl along (the old "push-pull"), I get friendzoned, get angry, beak things off, and these dudes go back to using them as booty calls .

 

Trust me, it's not about "being ready", "birth control", or saving your virginity for Jesus, it's about women obsessing over rich or guys out of their league and taking me for granted (just like these guys take them for granted) in the process.

[snug.bunny]

The last few cases have been some guy who sees these girls 1 time a month for what is essentially a booty call, then when I come into the picture and see I'm not just another "friend" they stop taking these girls for granted and put in a little effort to keep stringing the girl along (the old "push-pull"), I get friendzoned, get angry, beak things off, and these dudes go back to using them as booty calls .

 

Trust me, it's not about "being ready", "birth control", or saving your virginity for Jesus, it's about women obsessing over rich or guys out of their league and taking me for granted (just like these guys take them for granted) in the process.

 

Oh. So you're collectively option 2, for them. Looks like you need to become option 1 and only!

[Nexus One]

Trust me, it's not about "being ready", "birth control", or saving your virginity for Jesus, it's about women obsessing over rich or guys out of their league and taking me for granted (just like these guys take them for granted) in the process.

 

Do you feel your chances would improve if you had a lot of money?

[Wolf18]

Oh. So you're collectively option 2, for them. Looks like you need to become option 1 and only!

 

Easier said than done.

 

Do you feel your chances would improve if you had a lot of money? [/Quote]

 

I don't want it, but of course it would. The common denominator of all these cockwranglers that I got passed up for is that they are older and have really good jobs.

[snug.bunny]

Easier said than done.

 

 

 

I don't want it, but of course it would. The common denominator of all these cockwranglers that I got passed up for is that they are older and have really good jobs.

 

Do you not have a "good" job?

[Wolf18]

Do you not have a "good" job?

 

 

Nah, mostly temporary jobs at the moment. In maybe 3-4 months I'm likely going to be unemployed again or working some droning service mcjob. I'm hoping finishing school will help me find stable employment.