hibiscus21 Posted December 10, 2011 Posted December 10, 2011 So some background about me and my ex. We dated for 6 months, we both have a lot of mutual friends. We were actually friends before we dated. I hadn't gotten over my last bf of 2yrs when we started to date. It was a bad situation, so in the end we decided to break up so we could work on ourselves, and then eventually work out. That didn't go as planned. I ended up going to my ex-bf's party(ex of 2yrs) and my current ex found out, he started questioning me and saying really mean things. This went on for a few weeks, whatever i would do, he would get upset and question me. He left me a couple notes saying he loved me and he was sorry for getting so angry. But by this point, he had driven me to the point where I had to block him from everything because he wouldn't leave me alone. So it has been about a month and a half. At his point we pretty much hate each other. I decided to contact him because for one, we have mutual friends and it was getting awkward. Secondly, i didn't want to hate him anymore. We met up for coffee. He told me that i was pretty much horrible to him, he thought it was stupid that i blocked him. He has already started seeing someone, which honestly it hurt, but he said he was over me and found someone else. The other day he asked me if i had hooked up with my ex, which i had. I eventually told him. I didn't want to lie, but i didn't want to hurt him. He acted like everything was fine at first. But then he told me he would never ever trust me again. He said he was so betrayed and hurt. He said I was stupid and should have made better decisions than that. He basically made me feel horrible about myself. I realized my mistake, and I told him that. He told me he would have never put himself in that situation, or make that kind of mistake. I find that really hard to believe, because he cheated on one of his gfs and then hooked up with an ex after a week of breaking up with another gf. I am wondering if his anger is justified? He is already with someone, and yes I understand he would be hurt. But he is acting like he has never made any mistakes before. I'm not sure how to proceed. I feel bad for what I did, but we were broken up and it was a moment of weakness. If i need to explain anymore, i will try too. I just didn't want to make this post incredibly long.
Author hibiscus21 Posted December 10, 2011 Author Posted December 10, 2011 No I'm not. We broke up before any of this happened.
BoredAgain Posted December 10, 2011 Posted December 10, 2011 This is why it's generally a good idea to keep your distance from a person you just broke up with. Emotions run high and a lot of drama is caused. Give him and yourself some time and space for a few months.
smokey bear Posted December 10, 2011 Posted December 10, 2011 ok, couple questions. The ex who is angry, do you have feelings for him, honestly if you admit you werent over your old ex. The ex you slept with, why did you sleep with him, why didnt you's get back together, was it him or you?
mike588 Posted December 10, 2011 Posted December 10, 2011 So some background about me and my ex. We dated for 6 months, we both have a lot of mutual friends. We were actually friends before we dated. I hadn't gotten over my last bf of 2yrs when we started to date. It was a bad situation, so in the end we decided to break up so we could work on ourselves, and then eventually work out. That didn't go as planned. I ended up going to my ex-bf's party(ex of 2yrs) and my current ex found out, he started questioning me and saying really mean things. This went on for a few weeks, whatever i would do, he would get upset and question me. He left me a couple notes saying he loved me and he was sorry for getting so angry. But by this point, he had driven me to the point where I had to block him from everything because he wouldn't leave me alone. So it has been about a month and a half. At his point we pretty much hate each other. I decided to contact him because for one, we have mutual friends and it was getting awkward. Secondly, i didn't want to hate him anymore. We met up for coffee. He told me that i was pretty much horrible to him, he thought it was stupid that i blocked him. He has already started seeing someone, which honestly it hurt, but he said he was over me and found someone else. The other day he asked me if i had hooked up with my ex, which i had. I eventually told him. I didn't want to lie, but i didn't want to hurt him. He acted like everything was fine at first. But then he told me he would never ever trust me again. He said he was so betrayed and hurt. He said I was stupid and should have made better decisions than that. He basically made me feel horrible about myself. I realized my mistake, and I told him that. He told me he would have never put himself in that situation, or make that kind of mistake. I find that really hard to believe, because he cheated on one of his gfs and then hooked up with an ex after a week of breaking up with another gf. I am wondering if his anger is justified? He is already with someone, and yes I understand he would be hurt. But he is acting like he has never made any mistakes before. I'm not sure how to proceed. I feel bad for what I did, but we were broken up and it was a moment of weakness. If i need to explain anymore, i will try too. I just didn't want to make this post incredibly long. Your current ex. has no reason to be upset that you went to the other ex.s party or got back together with the other ex.because you two were broken up. Sounds like he was still in love with you and is jealous you went back to the ex.
happypanda21 Posted December 10, 2011 Posted December 10, 2011 He still has deep feelings for you, it's as simple as that. It still hurts him, the idea of you sleeping with other guys even though ya'll are not together. Most people will feel that way about their ex if they have feelings, so it is very understandable. It seems as though you have feelings for him still, just not as strong as he is feeling. Just as it hurts you knowing that he is dating someone, its the same for him. Do yourself a favor and keep your distance from him until you are ready to get back with him, fully and 100%. Do not invite him for coffee, drinks, movies, or anything. You cannot change how he feels about you. He still likes you and being close to him will only make it stronger. As far as your mutual friends. Talk to them. Let them know what's going on. Tell them it is hard and wierd to be around him and them at the same time, and ask that they understand. It's not that your purposly making it hard, it's just that moving on is very hard and spending time around him makes it worse. If they are truly your friends, they will understand.
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