kourix Posted December 8, 2011 Posted December 8, 2011 so the ex and i broke up ~three weeks ago, and today, i found out i had shingles, going to miss two weeks of work and have been instructed to strictly stay home. plus, it's almost that time of the month, so PMS is setting in and all i wanted to do was to text him. we've been NC since the breakup, 'cept last week when i bumped into him and we exchanged a few msgs and he said "i miss you... a little" for no reason, and when i replied yeah well it was fun while we were dating, he stopped replying and hasn't been in contact since. needless to say, he was the dumper, first saying he wanted a serious girlfriend, and didn't want to be in a relationship pretty soon after we "did it". practically forced me to end it after a horrible weekend together (could not deal with his ways any longer- he didn't stop me either, saying "yeah it's not fair if i want something physical and you want something serious blah blah bsbsbsbs", thus i still picture him as the dumper). he was pretty douchey, never really made me feel safe (always felt there was something "off", but gave it a shot and got slapped in the face anyway). however, now that i'm sick, i'm so afraid that i'll be so lonely etc that i just want to talk to him, or even just to say, hey, i know you don't care, but i've got the shingles... i don't know why i'm telling you this. i just want him to care, even though a part of me knows he probably wouldn't. i haven't succumbed so far, but that's because i was out. i'm going to be stuck at home for the next two weeks, and i don't trust myself. i just feel this urge to contact him so much more after finding out and i even almost cried in public today. we weren't together for long, i only knew him for like two months, but, meh, i miss that. i'm 24, just became single again after once again being played (i don't know why i always find men who seem to just want me for sex and it's really hit me hard) and now i find out i've got the shingles, a disease more commonly associated with people over 50. it feels like my whole life is a joke.
geegirl Posted December 8, 2011 Posted December 8, 2011 (edited) hey, i know you don't care, but i've got the shingles... i don't know why i'm telling you this. i just want him to care, even though a part of me knows he probably wouldn't. You have to have more respect for yourself, shingles or not to send him a text like that. If you have to prod someone to care for you, then they don't care for you. When they don't care for you, you don't beg them to care for you. 1. does not care for you 2. douchey 3. just sex It's normal to feel alone and helpless when you're sick but it's not a good enough reason to beg for someone to care for you. In two weeks you will be better, then what? Would you still want him to care? Or once you're past your shingles, you'll be strong enough to move on? Shingles is an excuse. Items 1, 2 and 3 are reasons. Stick to the facts. Maybe use these two weeks on some self reflection - statements you made 1) why you attract men that only want sex 2) your strong attachment to someone after only two months - rather than fixating on douchey. Edited December 8, 2011 by geegirl
Fufu Posted December 8, 2011 Posted December 8, 2011 2 months is a blessing in disguise. You should be happy to see this sight of him than months or years later on. Being alone is better than to be with someone who gives up on you easily.
Author kourix Posted December 9, 2011 Author Posted December 9, 2011 thanks, and this morning i just found out my dog (the one person? i absolutely love) has such a bad infection she's going to be operated on and she might not survive. they are removing her whole uterus but the toxins are already in her bloodstream, and if the operation doesn't manage to get everything out, she'll have to be put down. oh god i don't know how to deal.
Art_Critic Posted December 9, 2011 Posted December 9, 2011 Sorry about your dog.. hope she gets well soon.... The text... "i miss you... a little" wasn't meant the way you are taking it.. He didn't say he missed you a lot.. he said "a little" meaning I still don't want to get back with you... As hard as it is stick with the NC.. if you break NC, it will only make you feel worse later on when you don't get the response you were hoping for... Take care of yourself.... ~Art
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