ziggue Posted December 7, 2011 Posted December 7, 2011 My ex boyfriend and I had really great chemistry and got along really well. Even one of our mutual friends said she thought things were going great with him and I at the start. He ends up ending it with me because he had little time for me because of work and study. At times he would cancel on me as well and I was getting a little frustrated because I was not seeing him as much as I would like. We had a talk about it and I tried to talk him around seeing me at least one day a week and he still could not promise me that. I did not think I was asking for to much and did not have to see him everyday. I had my own friends and life as well. I could have lived with that. Still. He was pretty skeptical because I did sound a little bit upset in some of my texts I sent him when he cancelled. Wish I had not initiated texts as much. Maybe that might have made a difference and keep thinking if I had just backed off things might have been different. I was then just willing to go with the flow again and then he tells me he is not ready for something serious either. He had gotten out of a serious '****ty relationship' he called it last year and was not in the right frame of mind to start something new. He said he still would like to remain friends though. He admitted to still liking me and gave me a compliment on my new hair cut and even went on about catching up again. It has now been a month and a half since we broke up. I have not heard from him at all. I did no contact but did cave a few times and sent like 3 texts over that period of time. Every couple of weeks. The last one was very short and was only one sentence. This was after I had deleted him off Facebook. I replied back to it and got no response. Got really annoyed by the fact he did not seem to want anything to do with me and ended up deleting his number. Realising he reacted this way with the last two as well. But when I wished him Happy Birthday on the one before hand. He did tell me to have fun in Queensland. Remembering I was going away that weekend. He was less friendlier in the last one and that kind of hurt. Backing off now though. Hence deleting the numbers and stuff. Just do not understand why he is being so cold to me when he was the one that dumped me and wanted to be friends in the first place. It hurt so much I ended up blocking him on Facebook. I keep blaming myself. Thinking if only I had done things a different way. I feel like I pressured him and scared him off without really meaning to and now he is probably out dating other girls and stuff. Now we don't talk or hang out at all. I can't believe that something so little would turn him off like that. .
aneesah1 Posted December 7, 2011 Posted December 7, 2011 Personally, from my point of view, i don't think it was really your fault. You were definitely not asking for much or being clingy. You have initiated to try to talk to him. You tried to work things out with him. And that's excellent. However, he didnt reciprocate in this relationship as well as you did. It seemed to me as if he was pushing himself away and saying he has little time. Maybe in truth, he might have been busy. But if he really, truly cared about you and loved you, he would have tried to make time, to spend time with you. Your exbf sounds just like mine more than a yr ago. He kinda left me saying he has no time for serious relationships and gave studies as an excuse. Even after saying he still wants to be friends, he deleted me off facebook. i got hurt but i knew he was not worth it. Nw, he has apologised and added me back on facebook. We are actually good friends now, though he can still be distant sometimes. He has even confessed to me that he is not ready for a relationship and just prefers to be single, without any commitment, without any problems. Moral of my story: Maybe your ex may be that type of guy who is afraid of commitments too. It's not your fault. He is just not ready while you were. You should try to move on with your life Looks like you are already, with you deleting him from facebook and his number and stuff. When the right one comes along, you will know it. Just keep your head up!
dasein Posted December 7, 2011 Posted December 7, 2011 Not your fault at all. He is just not interested it seems, and is being rude in not being able to communicate that clearly. In the end it's a good thing he hasn't been responsive, as you know to move on without any lingering hope for the relationship to move forward. Good luck.
Soxfaninfl Posted December 7, 2011 Posted December 7, 2011 You didn't do anything wrong. He wasn't right for you. You want someone that wants to spend time with you and that is ready for a relationship. There is nothing you could have done differently. Me personally I don't do friends with ex's because some times it will bring back old feelings. He is the past. Move on and find someone that wants a serious relationship and doesn't have commitment issues.
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