Lowib Posted December 7, 2011 Posted December 7, 2011 It's all about being rational. It sounds simple but it really isn't. Let me explain, I've been seeing a psychologist since my break up as I feel like I've lost myself and I'm only 25. Anyways, he's done an excellent job of isolating my thoughts and rationalizing them and you know what it makes sense. Now, my ex left me 3 times. We got back together twice because each time I was so heart broken and desperate to get her back. In my head I knew this was a bad idea, and my family and friends warned me each time. But, I would rationalize and believe that things would work out. She never changed and I knew this, and if I came on here before all this you probably would of all warned me as well. Why did I go back? I was being irrational. She left me for another guy, and all I could think is am I worthless? I must be ugly? I must suck somehow or else she wouldn't leave me. But, rationalize the truth and it's that she has found a guy who is paying attention to her. She doesn't know him, she only knows what she thinks it's going to be. She's known me for a long time, she knows what she can have with me, and to be honest things haven't always been smooth. So, it's not cause I'm worthless, it's cause he's new. Now, rationalize that further, your ex jumped right into another relationship? It may work out, it may not. But, really they are that desperate they can't be alone? You on the other hand are single, and as long as you live life, you're going to meet someone. If you're rational, it's just nonsense not to think you'll not meet someone. Was your ex your first ever? Probably not. And the great thing you can take VICTORY in is that you will have been alone, improved yourself and are stronger than before. But, your ex on the other hand has a good lesson ahead of them So, in the end when we are heart broken we are irrational but if we step outside ourselves we can really see what it is. These thoughts we play over in our head our detrimental and plain WRONG. Just throw out some examples of what you are thinking and tune them into some that makes sense. Then look at what you think, and what is rational, and make a choice what is the best answer.
mike588 Posted December 7, 2011 Posted December 7, 2011 It's all about being rational. It sounds simple but it really isn't. Let me explain, I've been seeing a psychologist since my break up as I feel like I've lost myself and I'm only 25. Anyways, he's done an excellent job of isolating my thoughts and rationalizing them and you know what it makes sense. Now, my ex left me 3 times. We got back together twice because each time I was so heart broken and desperate to get her back. In my head I knew this was a bad idea, and my family and friends warned me each time. But, I would rationalize and believe that things would work out. She never changed and I knew this, and if I came on here before all this you probably would of all warned me as well. Why did I go back? I was being irrational. She left me for another guy, and all I could think is am I worthless? I must be ugly? I must suck somehow or else she wouldn't leave me. But, rationalize the truth and it's that she has found a guy who is paying attention to her. She doesn't know him, she only knows what she thinks it's going to be. She's known me for a long time, she knows what she can have with me, and to be honest things haven't always been smooth. So, it's not cause I'm worthless, it's cause he's new. Now, rationalize that further, your ex jumped right into another relationship? It may work out, it may not. But, really they are that desperate they can't be alone? You on the other hand are single, and as long as you live life, you're going to meet someone. If you're rational, it's just nonsense not to think you'll not meet someone. Was your ex your first ever? Probably not. And the great thing you can take VICTORY in is that you will have been alone, improved yourself and are stronger than before. But, your ex on the other hand has a good lesson ahead of them So, in the end when we are heart broken we are irrational but if we step outside ourselves we can really see what it is. These thoughts we play over in our head our detrimental and plain WRONG. Just throw out some examples of what you are thinking and tune them into some that makes sense. Then look at what you think, and what is rational, and make a choice what is the best answer. My ex. dumped me for her ex.and I was thinking the same thing,, he's better,maybe he's more handsome etc. etc. even though I knew I was a rebound guy I still felt if I was better than him she wouldn"t of left. I too have been taking time for myself (4 months now) healing and trying to better myself but my ex. is a relationship jumper and now that she's back to her ex. 2nd, maybe 3rd time I wonder how long that will last before it blows up again and she will be contacting me for comfort.
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