Jackie Lightly Posted December 6, 2011 Posted December 6, 2011 I want to prefix this by saying that I'm brand new here and I do apologize for just barging in with my question but I'm kind of at that point. I need help figuring this situation out and everyone I know has long standing, entrenched opinions on the matter. So! Seeking out new input has brought me here. I appreciate any help I can get... I have know this man for about a decade at this point. For about nine out of those ten years, I have loved him. At first it was a crush and then it grew, faded away for a while, and then grew again. He is the kind of person that no matter how much he pisses me off or screws up in his own life (not that he's a total screw up, but he has made mistakes), I naturally forgive him. I will be mad, yes, but ultimately I feel the most joy in just appreciating him for who he is. I love talking to him, being with him, and I really, really enjoy making him happy/being happy with him. The truly happiest moments of my dating life have been with him and deep down I just have this feeling like we belong together. The problem of the situation is that we have always lived at least half the country away from one another. We talk online, Skype, talk on the phone, and have hung out in person for several weeks. Unfortunately we have hardly ever even been single at the same time. I love him and I know he loves me but we have both always been afraid to take the big chance of moving the relationship to the next level, whether that means long distance or one of us moving to be with the other one. I've been in many other relationships while I've known him and usually they start out great. Usually, I don't even think of him as anything more than a friend for a while but as time goes on I find myself back to thinking about him. And then I think about him all the time, a lot of times I even wonder if I should break up with my boyfriend for him. There's a lot more to this story and why I feel the way I do but I don't need to bore anyone with details. Am I crazy? Am I in love? Should I move on from this guy somehow or do I need to take a shot? I'm so confused about this and I have been for so long but now I am starting to get into serious relationships and I want to understand this before someone asks me to make a major commitment to them. I'd appreciate anyone's input at all. Thank you!
Seneca Posted December 6, 2011 Posted December 6, 2011 Wow your story has got me quite curious and intrigued. I love him and I know he loves me but we have both always been afraid to take the big chance of moving the relationship to the next level, whether that means long distance or one of us moving to be with the other one. "Fear... these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart." - Steve Jobs
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