hopelessbutterfly Posted December 3, 2011 Posted December 3, 2011 (edited) Hi guys Just found the forum I'm looking for a bit of advice. I've been in a LDR for a about a year. I met him through a friend while he was visiting down here and when we hung out, we really hit it off. He went back to Seattle (I'm in Oregon) and we continued talking and he asked me out. I said no the first time then we kept talking and he asked again, and I said yes. We haven't seen each other since the first time because he started school and we don't have any plans to yet Well the past few months have been really tough. He's become really depressed, possibly bi-polar and he was seeing a counselor for about two weeks. I really try to understand him because I've been through depression myself, but sometimes I feel like he doesn't make the effort he used to and I'm just always confused if he's really into me or not. Every time I get upset about something, which isn't very often, he'll bring up his depression as an excuse that he doesn't need to deal with it. I guess I can't blame him but just because he is depressed mean my feelings come second? I'm always there for him when he needed to rant or someone to talk to. The past 4 days or so we haven't talked because he just got some minor surgery the other day. I know he's been in pain and such so I've left him alone unless he texted me. I texted him last night and said "I love you, goodnight and i hope you're feeling okay." He just said "Night. Sorry I haven't talked I haven't felt well." I thought that was fine and he said Ok. and I said "Aren't you forgetting something? those 3 words? :)" he just wrote back "Oh my god whatever." I got a little hurt but I didn't feel like I overreacted, I said "I'm just trying to help, I've been leaving you alone while I've been lonely and you can't even say I love you.." and he told me to F off.. so I told him maybe we should just be friends until he learns to respect me because I don't let people talk to me that way.. and he said maybe it's for the best because he doesn't need people Fing with his head right now? Again we haven't talked today, no texts calls or IMs. :/ I'm not really sure what to do.. do you guys think I overreacted? Should I have brought up that he didn't say it at all? I've just tried to be there for him and I just wanted 3 words back.. Whenever I don't say it back or forget, he doesn't like it either.. One side of me wants to text him but I don't want to feel needy and I don't feel like I should apologize. Maybe I should give him some space and he'll come around? I didn't want to break up but I got so mad at what he said.. Edited December 3, 2011 by hopelessbutterfly
aisle_seat Posted December 3, 2011 Posted December 3, 2011 The guy's completely out of line. Sure, he's depressed but he's sounds pretty immature to me. You should not apologize and you also should not contact him again. If he contacts you, keep your distance...you've got to protect your heart. Don't be his doormat. Live your life...you're young and have plenty of options. He needs to get right with himself before he can be good to you...or anyone for that matter.
Author hopelessbutterfly Posted December 3, 2011 Author Posted December 3, 2011 I ended up texting him about two hours ago and I said I hope we're okay and I'm calm and here when he wants to talk and no response :/ now I regret doing it.. if he isn't going to try than neither am I
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