sonrisa Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 Hi people ! I really need an opinion on something and I don't know where else I can talk about this. I've been going for a few months to a gym not too far from my job, sometimes with friends, sometimes alone. The first time I went there I noticed a very attractive guy at the reception, I had to go talk to him because my membership card didnt want to work so he had to open the door. Our conversations wouldn't go as far as "hi can you open the door for me please" "yes" "have a good day", but I noticed he stares at me a lot. Now my membership card works, so I don't have to talk to him anymore, I thought he'd just ignore me now, but instead the two times I went to the gym he actually started conversation with me even when I was leaving he would ask a dumb question to make me stay and chat a little. Now my question may sound dumb but what does he want from me ? Is he playing or what ? I mean he's VERY good-looking he could get any girl he wants why would he chose a very average girl instead ? I barely have experience when it comes to relationships and it's actually very rare for me to be so much interested into a guy Your advice are welcomed Thanks for reading
Casablanca Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 Now my question may sound dumb but what does he want from me ? Is he playing or what ? I mean he's VERY good-looking he could get any girl he wants why would he chose a very average girl instead ? Beauty is in the eye in the beholder; and while not a perfect rule, the hotter a girl, the more maintenance Ive noticed they typically need; at least from my experiences. For me, every girl I have dated or tried to date with the exception of 1, I KNEW in the first moments of seeing them/meeting them I wanted to get to know them and see if they had long term relationship potential. And it was all because how they carried themselves (and in a couple cases, didnt even talk with them yet, maybe just saw them interacting with something or someone); that could the the case for you too, in terms of why you have caught his eye. Id say one day ask him out for coffee to get to know him better.
cerridwen Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 He thinks you're cute. He may also want to see if you're smart, funny, or receptive. He may be simply a flirt. Linger next he talks to you and you'll get a better feel for what he's after.
Feelin Frisky Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 Sounds like he might be into you. There are a number of things that might be at play. You shouldn't put yourself down. If you're interested, go for it. He may be a player or maybe he sees something about you that you don't see about yourself that he finds appealing.
insertnamehere Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 a very average girl Pics or this is a lie. Sorry, I raised a girl who is a knock-out. And she spent all her time acting like she was too hideous for public consumption.
jobaba Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 (edited) Now my question may sound dumb but what does he want from me ? Is he playing or what ? I mean he's VERY good-looking he could get any girl he wants why would he chose a very average girl instead ? You're not gonna wanna hear this, but... Really good looking guys go for average and above women all the time. Why? Because they know they can succeed and really hot girls are TOUGH. Women who are like 6s and 7s get picked up at a public places by guys who are 9s and 10s all the time. Seen my few friends/acquaintances who are that good looking do it. Seen really good looking guys hit on average girls at bars all the time AND get rejected HARD. Men have a broader range of what they find attractive. If he thinks you're kinda cute, there's a good chance he'll go for you. If he's a d@ouchebag hot guy, he's looking for pump and dump. But if he's a nice good looking guy (of which there are more than you think), maybe he likes something about you. Maybe he's a serial dater. To be honest, real good looking guys often don't pick the best looking girl to settle down with. Or he could be gay and want a new Zumba buddy. Win for you either way. Go talk to him... Edited November 30, 2011 by jobaba
Author sonrisa Posted November 30, 2011 Author Posted November 30, 2011 Beauty is in the eye in the beholder; and while not a perfect rule, the hotter a girl, the more maintenance Ive noticed they typically need; at least from my experiences. For me, every girl I have dated or tried to date with the exception of 1, I KNEW in the first moments of seeing them/meeting them I wanted to get to know them and see if they had long term relationship potential. And it was all because how they carried themselves (and in a couple cases, didnt even talk with them yet, maybe just saw them interacting with something or someone); that could the the case for you too, in terms of why you have caught his eye. Id say one day ask him out for coffee to get to know him better. Thank you for the advice, I'm shy I don't think I could ask him out...
Author sonrisa Posted November 30, 2011 Author Posted November 30, 2011 He thinks you're cute. He may also want to see if you're smart, funny, or receptive. He may be simply a flirt. Linger next he talks to you and you'll get a better feel for what he's after. I don't know why I have a huge feeling he's a big flirt, I will see next time I go to the gym
Author sonrisa Posted November 30, 2011 Author Posted November 30, 2011 Pics or this is a lie. Sorry, I raised a girl who is a knock-out. And she spent all her time acting like she was too hideous for public consumption. It's true that I have a problem with self-image so I understand what your daughter feels but I still don't think I'm a knockout, I'm average
Author sonrisa Posted November 30, 2011 Author Posted November 30, 2011 You're not gonna wanna hear this, but... Really good looking guys go for average and above women all the time. Why? Because they know they can succeed and really hot girls are TOUGH. Women who are like 6s and 7s get picked up at a public places by guys who are 9s and 10s all the time. Seen my few friends/acquaintances who are that good looking do it. Seen really good looking guys hit on average girls at bars all the time AND get rejected HARD. Men have a broader range of what they find attractive. If he thinks you're kinda cute, there's a good chance he'll go for you. If he's a d@ouchebag hot guy, he's looking for pump and dump. But if he's a nice good looking guy (of which there are more than you think), maybe he likes something about you. Maybe he's a serial dater. To be honest, real good looking guys often don't pick the best looking girl to settle down with. Or he could be gay and want a new Zumba buddy. Win for you either way. Go talk to him... Lol, I really don't think he's gay, eventhough it's not something always obvious. I'm not sure about your theory, where I live, good looking guys usually date good looking girls that's, still there are exceptions, but don't guys love to brag about how hot their woman is to their friends ? Judging from his body type he's more into bodybuilding than zumba
jobaba Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Lol, I really don't think he's gay, eventhough it's not something always obvious. I'm not sure about your theory, where I live, good looking guys usually date good looking girls that's, still there are exceptions, but don't guys love to brag about how hot their woman is to their friends ? Judging from his body type he's more into bodybuilding than zumba Good looking guys date average women and good looking women date average men. BUT ... men usually make the first move. So, they're not just going to hit on 9s and 10s all the time. Too much rejection. Know what I mean. And in NYC, if a woman sees a REALLY good looking guy, the first thing they say is ... he must be gay.
mtber75 Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Hi people ! I really need an opinion on something and I don't know where else I can talk about this. I've been going for a few months to a gym not too far from my job, sometimes with friends, sometimes alone. The first time I went there I noticed a very attractive guy at the reception, I had to go talk to him because my membership card didnt want to work so he had to open the door. Our conversations wouldn't go as far as "hi can you open the door for me please" "yes" "have a good day", but I noticed he stares at me a lot. Now my membership card works, so I don't have to talk to him anymore, I thought he'd just ignore me now, but instead the two times I went to the gym he actually started conversation with me even when I was leaving he would ask a dumb question to make me stay and chat a little. Now my question may sound dumb but what does he want from me ? Is he playing or what ? I mean he's VERY good-looking he could get any girl he wants why would he chose a very average girl instead ? I barely have experience when it comes to relationships and it's actually very rare for me to be so much interested into a guy Your advice are welcomed Thanks for reading Is he a personal trainer or something? It just might be that he wants you to try the gym's training program. You just have to talk to him more to find out. He just might be interested in a date also:)
insertnamehere Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 It's true that I have a problem with self-image so I understand what your daughter feels but I still don't think I'm a knockout, I'm average Actually it's my niece. I won't bore you with the details, but suffice it to say that raising a teenage girl while also dealing with your own dating life provides a unique perspective about women and their issues. It's funny, because I sorta got both sides of the story. Consequently, I have an abiding empathy for women and their image issues. I just wish women understood how much we guys want you to let it go and let us just be crazy about you.
Andy_K Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Now my question may sound dumb but what does he want from me ? Is he playing or what ? I mean he's VERY good-looking he could get any girl he wants why would he chose a very average girl instead ? Two possibilities: 1) You are actually average, and in this case chances are he thinks you'll put out easily for him because of this 2) You are way above average, and he may or may not have a genuine interest in you.
Necromancer Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 I think that you´r not average looking,but if.....then i think you might be his type. We can´t say what he want´s from you.....there´s only one way to see what he wants,go talk to him. I think you have a good chance,if he approached you then there´s very high chance that he likes you. at least i woudn´t approach a girl that i don´t like!. Good Luck! because you will need it ;D
Author sonrisa Posted November 30, 2011 Author Posted November 30, 2011 Is he a personal trainer or something? It just might be that he wants you to try the gym's training program. You just have to talk to him more to find out. He just might be interested in a date also:) I don't know if he's a personal trainer or not, but if he wanted to advertise a training program he would have done it a long time ago, when I went with a friend that wanted to try out, he explained everything to her right away.
Author sonrisa Posted November 30, 2011 Author Posted November 30, 2011 I just wish women understood how much we guys want you to let it go and let us just be crazy about you. With the kind of society we're living in, we have so much pressure to look good that it creates issues like these...
insertnamehere Posted December 1, 2011 Posted December 1, 2011 With the kind of society we're living in, we have so much pressure to look good that it creates issues like these... As a guy, nothing wears on me more than trying to tell a girl she's pretty. Throw us a bone every now and then and just say thanks. Lie if need be.
Author sonrisa Posted December 10, 2011 Author Posted December 10, 2011 So it's been a few days since I've made this thread, I saw him like 2 times, the first one I had such a bad week that I didn't feel like talking or making eye contact with anyone. Last night I went to the gym and had to meet a friend after, since she was far I waited for her inside the gym, I was talking with the security guy. Then the guy I have a crush on finished working and came to say bye to the security guy, then stared at me and said "what are you doing here" I was a bit surprised I told him I was waiting for someone, then I asked him why he was so agressive then he said "no but it's just that you're usually gone at this time" then he left. I'm even more confused I really don't know if he's interested in me or not I think I'm just going to give up =/
Tybalt Posted December 10, 2011 Posted December 10, 2011 Maybe he saw you talking to the security guy and didn't like it. Perhaps he came over to "say goodbye" to the guy to suss out what was going on between you two. If he was just being a friendly employee who was possibly trying to butter you up for some kind of class or training session, etc, I doubt he would have dropped the flirtatious, friendly demeanor and asked you a personal question that honestly was none of his business, in a more serious or "aggressive" way. If it were me I might find a way to ask him what he does for fun besides the gym. Try to open up the conversation and imply you're interested in knowing him beyond that environment. And if he backs off or corrects his course back to "professional" behavior, then leave it be. It sounds like his interest is more than just a friendliness with everyone, but you never know his situation. He might have a relationship he isn't totally happy in but he won't cross the line to cheating. Or he might feel uncomfortable with ethics surrounding dating a gym member. All you can do is give him an opening and be respectful of his position.
Author sonrisa Posted December 10, 2011 Author Posted December 10, 2011 Maybe he saw you talking to the security guy and didn't like it. Perhaps he came over to "say goodbye" to the guy to suss out what was going on between you two. If he was just being a friendly employee who was possibly trying to butter you up for some kind of class or training session, etc, I doubt he would have dropped the flirtatious, friendly demeanor and asked you a personal question that honestly was none of his business, in a more serious or "aggressive" way. If it were me I might find a way to ask him what he does for fun besides the gym. Try to open up the conversation and imply you're interested in knowing him beyond that environment. And if he backs off or corrects his course back to "professional" behavior, then leave it be. It sounds like his interest is more than just a friendliness with everyone, but you never know his situation. He might have a relationship he isn't totally happy in but he won't cross the line to cheating. Or he might feel uncomfortable with ethics surrounding dating a gym member. All you can do is give him an opening and be respectful of his position. Thank you for posting your opinion, well I would need to find a way to get to know him more, but I don't know how, he's quite busy with customers always around his desk, I also fear rejection that's why I'm not being "straight obvious" . I would prefer to be sure at 100% before making any move.
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